Wearing A Turban Has Ruined My Life

[Guest Guest]

The title says it all really. I cant stop wearing it, because my hair started falling out when I was younger from it being tied tight....and have ugly bumps on my scalp from the hair being twisted.

I have had numerous discussions with my parents asking why they didnt let me cut my hair when I was younger, but they are ignorant about life and the negative effect it has on my life. I see girls going off with clean shaven guys all the time. Im an intelligent and honest guy but my turban and beard alienates me. Added to that Im not religious so feel fake, I have no option but to keep wearing a turban.

It has killed me everyday looking in the mirror and seeing such hair loss, when the rest of my hair healthy. Why did this happen to me? It happened because I was a Sikh, and in turn I have become more distant from Sikhism and more towards spirituality. Noticing the beauty of life and being free to do whatever you want, without following rules of your religion.

I shave and trime my beard, smoke and drink and I wear a turban-because I have no choice, does that make me a bad person? I feel like another person wearing a turban.....I didnt come into this world wearing one, I came into it with HAIR! if hair was given to me by god, and god is within each of us, its the individuals chose to do whatever he wants.

I dont have a sense of identity, because I am not my past or my future. I am this moment, I am not my thinking but the consiousness that is behind it....the stillness. I am at peace and free of pain, but do not wish to have external symbols identifying me to something. The turban and being forced to identify with a religion before I could decide has created alot of disharmony.

3 of my friends in high school cut their hair and are leading more happier and fufilled lives, yet I am tied to always wearing a turban or cap when I go out, I wish I could do the same, but I'm forced to endure this nightmare.

[japmans]

get an account.

pm me.

we've got some discussin to do!

the fact taht you wanted to post here shows that not only are you still unhappy, you want to be happy , AND you wanna be happy through sikhi.

[Revolutionary]

..right

I'm afraid most of us are stuck in this "nightmare "of yours and seem to be happy. I guess we are all delluded in this backward twisted turban thing.

By the way, I'm guessing you didn't really look at Sikhi proprely, because saying "more distant from Sikhism and more towards spirituality" is like saying "more distant from fire and more towards the heat" lol.. challo..

Study Sikh Spirituality dude.. trust me. You can;t get spiritual with all the drinking/smoking etc. Ever wondered the fact that they might cause your life to suck? Nope, let's blame it all on the turban.

If you're losing hair over tying a joora then you're doing it wrong. Go back to sqaure one and try different techniuqes of doing the joora.

[ocelot]

Dear brother;

I assume that you are only weraing turbon and not reciting any bani; That is the cause of all trouble.

There is saying in Punjabi "Door de dhool suhavne lagde nae". There is pain everywhere, only truth is bani. Your are asikh only in external form, until you recites bani you will not get peace. I only request you to recite bani just start with few pages with there meanings.

There is alot of suffering in this word and only way is to recite bani which is only learn inpraise of god.

Guru Maharaj has written

" Khalsa Mero roop hai Khass|

Khalse Maen main koroo Niwas|| "

Just remember everything is wish of God, you must have done a lot of good deed that you areborn in sikh family, The only thing is your parents made you external sikh but not teach you Bani. Just i request you start reciting bani you will get a lot of peace. Remember one thing

"Karan karawanhar Prabh eek hai doosar nahin koi"

You must be happy that God has given you so much. Just think about your life, only thing i want to say that recite bani and have faith in God.

Whenever you fely weak just remember sahibjadas, you will find strenght.Life is very small so follow the path which our guru has shown.

Please Recite bani and read our History.

waheguru jee da khalsa|

waheguru jee dee fateh||

[Ik-Oun-Kaar]

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ke Fateh

Ok I don't mean to sound rude or everything

but to the starter of this topic

Did you wright that as a joke or is that real???

because if thats real I am really really really shocked

but anyway if it is real please email me on info@thekhalsa.net because i really got to talk to you

and where are you from jio???

Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ke Fateh

[Guest Guest]

..right

I'm afraid most of us are stuck in this "nightmare "of yours and seem to be happy. I guess we are all delluded in this backward twisted turban thing.

By the way, I'm guessing you didn't really look at Sikhi proprely, because saying "more distant from Sikhism and more towards spirituality" is like saying "more distant from fire and more towards the heat" lol.. challo..

Study Sikh Spirituality dude.. trust me. You can;t get spiritual with all the drinking/smoking etc. Ever wondered the fact that they might cause your life to suck? Nope, let's blame it all on the turban.

If you're losing hair over tying a joora then you're doing it wrong. Go back to sqaure one and try different techniuqes of doing the joora.

I am merely stating from my point of view, wearing a turban has been a nightmare. If you have a strong sense of identity and belonging wearing the turban...it can bring alot of stability. However I have felt a contradiction over the years, wearing a turban...not being able to speak the language not feeling religious. The men in my family who wear a turban are arrogant and selfish people, and that is all I have seen growing up. But I know everyone is not like this.

I am more distant from Sikhism in the external symbols it uses to promote Sikhism. I have been wearing a turban for about 10 years now and it has killed me inside doing so. I feel confident at first but when I go out and around other people I feel fake, and the only reason Im wearing it is to cover up the hairloss. I remember being 11 years old and washing my hair, and clumps of hair falling out...and my parents solution was to make me wear a turban and not take me to the dr's (if my hair had been cut it would have grown back within a few months).

I only started drinking/smoking over a year ago when I just became dissilusioned with Sikhism, I harldy drink and have cut down smoking with the aim to quit and be more healthy. If I look at my thoughts....my life sucks because: I look disgusting, I am a bad Sikh for letting my hair fall out, I am a bad person for not doing well at school etc I was on track to doing medicine but couldnt face people because I felt like wearing a turban isnt me. But now I still have to wear a turban, but I have to live life, however I am still unhappy over wearing a turban.

My family tell me I look good in a turban, my older sister is against me cutting my hair, not that I can with the bumps on my scalp. However for her son who is 4 years old now, she is going to let him have cut hair because she has seen the effects its had on me. In response to spirituality and sikhism, they both have things in common like feeling at one and at peace. I try to be more acutely aware of the present moment, to notice my thoughts and emotions but to have a higher level of consiousness...so to observe them, notice the changes in my body when I feel an emotion, and realise I am not that emotion. But wearing the turban is such a strong external statement....it signals who I am not to everyone.

My hair loss is far too extreme now, I have had to cut my hair in order to apply steroid cream onto the bumps on my scalp. I get constant head aches from the bumps, called cutis verticis gyrata. If the creams dont work, then the dr's will use injects and then finally surgery.

[Guest Guest]

The title says it all really. I cant stop wearing it, because my hair started falling out when I was younger from it being tied tight....and have ugly bumps on my scalp from the hair being twisted.

I have had numerous discussions with my parents asking why they didnt let me cut my hair when I was younger, but they are ignorant about life and the negative effect it has on my life. I see girls going off with clean shaven guys all the time. Im an intelligent and honest guy but my turban and beard alienates me. Added to that Im not religious so feel fake, I have no option but to keep wearing a turban.

It has killed me everyday looking in the mirror and seeing such hair loss, when the rest of my hair healthy. Why did this happen to me? It happened because I was a Sikh, and in turn I have become more distant from Sikhism and more towards spirituality. Noticing the beauty of life and being free to do whatever you want, without following rules of your religion.

I shave and trime my beard, smoke and drink and I wear a turban-because I have no choice, does that make me a bad person? I feel like another person wearing a turban.....I didnt come into this world wearing one, I came into it with HAIR! if hair was given to me by god, and god is within each of us, its the individuals chose to do whatever he wants.

I dont have a sense of identity, because I am not my past or my future. I am this moment, I am not my thinking but the consiousness that is behind it....the stillness. I am at peace and free of pain, but do not wish to have external symbols identifying me to something. The turban and being forced to identify with a religion before I could decide has created alot of disharmony.

3 of my friends in high school cut their hair and are leading more happier and fufilled lives, yet I am tied to always wearing a turban or cap when I go out, I wish I could do the same, but I'm forced to endure this nightmare.

You're parents let you shave/trim the beard, smoke and drink but insist on you to wear the turban. Makes no sense.

Since you have made so much negative remarks about Sikhi, i'm not even going to bother telling you what to do.

Waheguru Jee has given us free will, do what you desire.

[Guest Guest]

Dear brother;

I assume that you are only weraing turbon and not reciting any bani; That is the cause of all trouble.

There is saying in Punjabi "Door de dhool suhavne lagde nae". There is pain everywhere, only truth is bani. Your are asikh only in external form, until you recites bani you will not get peace. I only request you to recite bani just start with few pages with there meanings.

There is alot of suffering in this word and only way is to recite bani which is only learn inpraise of god.

Guru Maharaj has written

" Khalsa Mero roop hai Khass|

Khalse Maen main koroo Niwas|| "

Just remember everything is wish of God, you must have done a lot of good deed that you areborn in sikh family, The only thing is your parents made you external sikh but not teach you Bani. Just i request you start reciting bani you will get a lot of peace. Remember one thing

"Karan karawanhar Prabh eek hai doosar nahin koi"

You must be happy that God has given you so much. Just think about your life, only thing i want to say that recite bani and have faith in God.

Whenever you fely weak just remember sahibjadas, you will find strenght.Life is very small so follow the path which our guru has shown.

Please Recite bani and read our History.

waheguru jee da khalsa|

waheguru jee dee fateh||

I don't think I am lucky to be born in a Sikh family. My mums life was ruined by her grandmother, forcing her to marry my dad at a young age, and not letting her go to school and to work in a factory instead. My dad being an abusive alcoholic and beating my mum, sisters, bro and me. He wears a turban by the way and acts like India and Sikhism is better than everything...I can not speak punjabi, I have tried but I have too many negative associations with punjabi, due to the constant belittling and bullying from my dad.

What do you think of when you use the word God? I do not like to use that word because it conjours up a mental image of a guy with a white beard who made life. However "being" is universally common, God if meaning happiness can have the opposite of unhappiness, evil...the devil if you will. However when you are in a state of "being" that is a feeling of joy and does not have any opposites, there are no thoughts or emotions....funnily enough the word emotion comes from the latin word electrum meaning inbalance. When you feel love, anger, jealousy, happiness etc...it creates an inbalance in the body. But I respect Sikhism for looking inward for peace and not through the external world, however being in that state of consiousness links us all, and is above being labelled.

[Guest Akirtghan]

being free to do whatever you want, without following rules of your religion.

think of a domesticated bird. it lives in a cage (rules). BUT because its in a cage it has no worries, yeh it can't be "free" to fly. but being in a case has advantages which outnumber the disadvantages. if the bird is in a cage, its master will provide it food, free of cost. the master will provide water, and make sure if it rains, the bird is inside the house and doesn't get wet. etc...... being in a cage also means security, a cat for example, cannot do anything to the bird if the bird is in the cage.

now, lets look at the other side, its a free bird, free to fly wherever it wants, when it wants. but then first and foremost it has to look for its own food, which is not easy. second it has to be ALWAYS on the lookout for predators, basically fear for its life all the time.

you can decide which is better :umm:

[Mehtab Singh]

being free to do whatever you want, without following rules of your religion.

think of a domesticated bird. it lives in a cage (rules). BUT because its in a cage it has no worries, yeh it can't be "free" to fly. but being in a case has advantages which outnumber the disadvantages. if the bird is in a cage, its master will provide it food, free of cost. the master will provide water, and make sure if it rains, the bird is inside the house and doesn't get wet. etc...... being in a cage also means security, a cat for example, cannot do anything to the bird if the bird is in the cage.

now, lets look at the other side, its a free bird, free to fly wherever it wants, when it wants. but then first and foremost it has to look for its own food, which is not easy. second it has to be ALWAYS on the lookout for predators, basically fear for its life all the time.

you can decide which is better :umm:

What a beautiful example that was. Simply amazing!