I've Done Something Wrong

[Kaljug Singh]

I'am a Keshdhari Sikh, looking to take amrit soon . However recently i was at the end of some racial abuse on a bus. A few white youths (chavs) made some remarks about my dastaar. Upon hearing all this abuse i lost my sense of control and attacked the youths. I didnt use my sarbloh kara or any weapon just my hands, elbows and knees. A few passengers tried to hold me back, but my sheer rush of andrenaline was enough to push them away and i continued attacking these chavs until i got kicked off the bus. Ever since this incident, i have been lablled a psycho by my friends. Sangat jee what can i do to replinsh these sins i have committed?

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

Get new friends who aren't judgemental cowards.

You did the right thing. When some fool disrespects your dastaar he is doing more than disrespecting you, he is disrespecting Guru-given saroop. Good on you for having the presence of mind and compassion not to kill those chavs where they stood or at least sending them to the nearest hospital on a stretcher.

If you had beaten them up because they called you fat/ugly/smelly/whatever, it would be a different thing. But to be honest, I would have patted you on the back for standing up for yourself. Honour and courage among young Sikhs seem to be diminishing.

Replace your friends with those who still have some self-respect.

K.

[harsimran kaur]

It's easy to have physical courage and beat someone when feeling angry. Think if every Sikh started beating up the people who make remarks about dastaar, kesh etc. Often what the bullies expect is to disturb the individual's mental state, so that he gets angry. And it's they who have won when that happens. We have to rise above it. aaee panthee sagal jamaatee, man jeetai jag jeet.

Sikhs are supposed to take up arms when severe injustice is done to people, not take part in petty brawls. Guru Sahib himself showed so much love for Datu even when he kicked him. How many of us could have such a strength and courage?

Some Gursikhs have sometimes posted here that Sikhs don't believe in sin.. there are just things that take us further away from our destiny and deeds that bring us closer. And to counter and avoid the doings and thoughts that take us away from Vaheguru, we just have to keep doing simran, paath, seva, ardaas to get closer to Him, and maybe most of all have patience and accept His Will.

Vaheguru ji ka khalsa, vaheguru ji ki fateh!

[Guest HS*]

Well firstly, I think that you did what felt natural and it worked pretty well. A note of caution though: racist whites are wising up and I'm surprised they didnt try to take pictures of you in order to report it to the police. Fortunately the ferocity of your response caught them off guard and will make them think twice in the future.

On a side note: I was warned by a friend of mine after we got involved in something similar. She was studying to be a lawyer and told me that british law is different to other countries. In other countries, if you are threatened, you are allowed to use reasonable force in response. In british law, however, when faced with a situation like this, you have to prove that you showed restraint or tried to defuse the situation. Then if the other side carry on or escalate their actions, you can respond in such a manner. I'm not sure how sound her advice is nowadays, but it would explain all the times skinheads have started on me and then said 'are you threatening me?' over and over again. Next time, ask them to stop in a clear, confident booming voice. Or stand up and ask them to make it clear what they were saying to your face. If they make any physical move, even if its getting in your personal space (which could mean anything), or more verbal abuse, you are vindicated to a certain extent. Is anyone a lawyer on sikhsangat? They could clear up the grey areas of what i'm trying to explain.

As for the friends, well you would be a fool to constantly seek their approval. School friends, college mates, uni mates all come and go, but the ones you will stay in touch with are the ones who accept you for who you are and wont judge you.

[Singhing2]

Paaji my reply was more like "What f***k did you say?" as i approached them. However if i did say what you said it would just make the situation worse, infact it would just infuriate me more.

lol I'm trying to get used to the stares. it is a demanding thing but you'll realise they are lovely people.. Who have no sense whatsoever.

[Guest guest101]

alot of people seem to be condoning violence on here, fair enough if they attacked you then you were in your rights to knock em out, im not sayin it was an unprovoked attack but 'sticks and stones'...

name calling is just childish they were just trying to provoke a reaction, which they did and no matter what way you try to dress it up your in the wrong for physically attacking them, if you were clever you couldve made a witty reply to shup them up, but you didnt, you used your anger towards them and went at them, if i was in the same situation i most likely wouldve done the same but to hit someone who hasnt laid a finger on me is just a bit wrong...

[Jag_Singh]

Paaji my reply was more like "What f***k did you say?" as i approached them. However if i did say what you said it would just make the situation worse, infact it would just infuriate me more.

lol I'm trying to get used to the stares. it is a demanding thing but you'll realise they are lovely people.. Who have no sense whatsoever.

Geting used to with stare with lovely people do not match!

[Singhing2]

Then why don't you be more lovely......^^