Marriage Problem?

[Guest Guest]

Indecisive ji,

The only way to know the truth is to test this guy's INTEGRITY.

My James Bond mind suggests that you should use another i.d and get in touch like before.

Just portray yourself as a better proposition then before i.e Rich, good looking, orphan, gullible plus stupid American trying to gain knowledge about Sikhism over CHAT site.

If required later send him a snap of Miss Universe 2011

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4131/5053954113_1693a11a19_z.jpg

Tell him how lovely it is to see such married couple

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1352367/Daughter-Tory-MP-Jonathan-Aitken-Alexandra-weds-Indian-lover.html

Soon you will get the picture

"Dudh da dudh, Paani da paani ho jayega"

[Guest uyh]

i agree with above.....

people from india think usa,uk and other countries are the place to be. Even if u go to india, when u say, or if they in some way later find out that ur from abroad. Note the difference people act to you. As earlier mentioned, you cant trust someone on the internet. What if the guy is a 35 year old man, two times divorced...sending younger pictures of himself ..or other people???

U should leave the marriage issue on our parents.. they think the best of u

what if he comes abroad, but he's having typical indian views, so u cant b the normal american girl...?

Trust me, this happens a lot..its sad people from india dont understand our morals and values from abroad

bhul chuk di khima

[Wicked Warrior]

The biggest issue is doubt. You have doubt or you would not be posting on here.

In the end, you don't know who he is. There are people, many thousands, who marry their partner and then realise the partner is different - they've changed (for the better or worse). Some may co-habit for decades before marrying and are still surprised.

Go with Vaheguru in your mind and heart but don't go with eyes closed. There are too many alarming things. Either find out more, explore and analyss, or step back and let go.

[AmarjitKaur]

wjkk wjkf to all,

I havn't been active for a while on this forum. And look where I enter from, Gupt section. My favorite.

Anyways, so looks like you got the sangat's opinion and not single one of above posters said to go for this guy and put down your parents who raised you, made you capable of standing against their own wishes.

I often get an interesting dream early in the morning. Part of me, knows I have to get up and part of me wants to just sleep and keep enjoying the dream as something interesting is about to happen.

Eventually I have to face the reality and get up. Then I think about a dream for a while during the day, but as day goes by. I forget and I realize that it was just a dream and reality is what I am living.

Hope you got the answer from my above lines.

Forget the guy, forget the chat with him or calls. Life is so precious that it shouldn't be wasted for people begging you, it should be rather spent for meaningful things.

And BTW, how do we define MAYA. Anything or anybody or any situation that makes you forget or take you away from waheguru. THIS IS infact taking you away from your NITNEM or concentration in life in general. SO you got it girl. ITS maya. Do ardas to Vaheguru to keep you above maya and connect you to wahegurujee through your nitnem, through respecting your parents, obeying them, working hard etc. etc.

[Bored]

WANTING AN EDUCATED partner is not a egotistical thing. U should really consider not going through with it. U dont even know him long enough for this to be a tuff decision for you. Let him go and Id suggest stick to someone who lives in the west and knows this lifestyle rather than someone coming from India.

[Guest Truth]

'The only way to know the truth is to test this guy's INTEGRITY.

My James Bond mind suggests that you should use another i.d and get in touch like before.' Thats funny!

On a serious note, this guys feelings would be seriously hurt if he knew you were doubting him so much and the universal truth law which is Gurbani states never to break someones heart as god resides there.

Ask god within if this guy is a good match for you, listen carefully to gods answer. We are all capable of doing this, if we all did our lifes would run alot smoother. We need to listen for gods hukam and follow it.

Be Truthful with this guy as Truth is what the path the god is all about, he is Truth itself. If you have questions, ask them.

Only you can find the answer, only god within you can answer your questions and noone else.

God bless you

[Guest 1720]

p.s 'Bored' I love this

'I am neither a child, a young man, nor an ancient; nor am I of any caste.' - Guru Nanak

Satguru Nanak was stating his true state and the state of us all, we are drops in the ocean, we are the same as Him, but unrealised as yet.

We are formless, without identity, without image and are limitless. We are infinite. I pray that one day the whole of the human race will discover the Truth.

Satnam Ji

[Guest Inda singh]

Do not go against ur parents! It's the biggest mistake u can make!

The only suggestion I have is if ur parents dnt wanna meet him and his fam then the got grounds for this, however they should try to make effort for u also!

But my dear sister do not defy ur parents!

After that if u truly believe in Vaheguru sache pathsha, then ur sanjog has already been decided u just have to wait and see what happens!

Vaheguru ji ka Khalsa

Vaheguru ji ki Fateh!

[Guest decided]

just wanted to give a little feedback to the sangat here.

Yes I made the right decision by hearing all of you Sangat's advices. I am grateful that I did. It is Guru ji's blessings that I came out of it.

Compatilibilty is very important to me and my family, i told him that and he could think it as a matter of ego or greedy DOesnt matter what he thinks. Its up to guruji to judge me on that.I made it well clear to the guy that I am not for it at all and totally stopped talking to him, cut off all the contacts. Even though he was still insisting that we could still be friends. But I didnt want to keep any contacts with him or be his "friend". That could never work. PLus i learned my lesson - No more chatting online with anyone, they might be veerji or bhaaji or just a friend, at first, could lead to worse things in future. I would also suggest the same to my other brothers and sisters who indulge in chatting online to NOT to make this mistake. :excl:

Anyway I am very thankful to the sangat and Guruji for helping me make the right decision

[Guest worried]

with respect to all d above posters how does one tell while interacting with a person on net that he/she is a genuine or fake.

if we like someone (considering for marriage on the net) or visa versa then y d need to address as him/her as veer/ bhen? would apppreciate all advice, thanks.