to marry a sikh

[Not2Cool2Argue]

Well, good luck with whatever u guys decide.

But if you don't mind, I would really like to hear your story: how a cherokee became a muslim.....

If it's presumptuous, sorry.

[dalsingh101]

I feel your pain curious.

That being said, we have to realise that our ideals can often be seriously mismatched with this world we live in. And you know it IS far from ideal. All sorts of factors come into play in our daily lifes and interactions with other people - cultural, historical, political. It's just the nature of things for better or worse (usually worse).

See a problem exists between the ideal of a unified world and the preservation of identity. We all experience it in different forms. Sikhs aren't exempt from this. Our society/faith developed in a very plural, multicultural background, however it still insists on maintaining a clear, distinct identity and preserving and propagating our society, especially through marriage .

You know with modern life and globalisation and the subtle and overt pressure to go along with the mainstream, it sometimes feels like it is becoming harder and harder to maintain our community. Truth be told, I'm sure a few of us sometimes feel like our identity is in danger of being compromised through indifference. And I know many numerically smaller communities feel this way right now!

Plus frankly speaking, yes, we also have to acknowledge that historically speaking there have been serious issues with certain elements from Islamic backgrounds and Sikhs which have left some measure of (dare I say negative) legacy on collective Sikh memory (only in my grandfathers time there was agreat slaughter). This isn't blaming every last Muslim of the past or today for attacks on Sikhs past and present by the way! Just acknowledging the past and its impact on the present.

As a lover of culture, and someone who feels strongly strongly anti-imperialist, I have nothing but admiration and fascination for native American culture/traditions. And I respect your decision to adopt whatever faith you have by the way.

But with all that being said. Men are men, the world over. That's a fact. I'm not presupposing anything, but you should ponder on whether this guy is being like most blokes and having his cake and eating it too. If he comes from a Panjabi Sikh background, our community is notorious for its conservatism and rigidity when it comes to marriage, this has its advantages and many disadvantages too - trust me!

The advice I give you now is that which I would give any women in a position similar to yours. At the very first instant, protect yourself, mainly I mean emotionally here. Get to understand people's intentions/minds through their behavior and not what they say. Don't be thinking about marriage yourself when he clearly has NO intentions that way. Avoid projecting your desires on the situation or reading it in a way that you would like it to be, see things as they are, even if this might cause some measure of heartache. Better a little heartache now (with a realisation of truth) than living in an illusion and having even more heartache later. I don't know this guy, you do. Just keep your wits about you and don't put yourself in any position to get used.

I'm sort of rambling on here, but I hope you get my drift?

[gurdssingh]

sorry curioustoknow but i think your a wind up merchant, just going by your post, like i said sorry you may be 100% honest but i doubt it.

[dalsingh101]

^^^

Yeh, I think it may be wind up too. Probably some Muslim guy?

I mean, most Muslims know that Muslim women can't marry non-Muslims.

[curioustoknow]

sorry curioustoknow but i think your a wind up merchant, just going by your post, like i said sorry you may be 100% honest but i doubt it.

not sure what you guys mean by this but I assume you mean you don't believe my story? It's cool, I'm not asking you to believe I am just asking for advice

As for my journey to Islam, I'll start a new thread because the story is long :-)

But I'll think about what you guys have said, no matter how strong my feelings are for, I guess I'll just hold off and try to move on...and I'm not a guy....

[curioustoknow]

sorry curioustoknow but i think your a wind up merchant, just going by your post, like i said sorry you may be 100% honest but i doubt it.

not sure what you guys mean by this but I assume you mean you don't believe my story? It's cool, I'm not asking you to believe I am just asking for advice

As for my journey to Islam, I'll start a new thread because the story is long :-)

But I'll think about what you guys have said, no matter how strong my feelings are for, I guess I'll just hold off and try to move on...and I'm not a guy....

[dalsingh101]

As for my journey to Islam, I'll start a new thread because the story is long :-)

Here we go............lol

abra cadabra! dawah

lol

[gurdssingh]

I think your a liar. Who works for nothing but just lets some one pay the rent. How did you pay bills, food, clothes look after your kids? That is just stupid. your story is ridiculous, native american lori who found allah - like where? Oh yeah when somone asks you something you just change the story abit. Like he doesn't really have family his friends are his family is what i meant. how old are you do you think we are all teenages and can't see when someone is chatting bob. now eff off.

[singher23]

I think your a liar. Who works for nothing but just lets some one pay the rent. How did you pay bills, food, clothes look after your kids? That is just stupid. your story is ridiculous, native american lori who found allah - like where? Oh yeah when somone asks you something you just change the story abit. Like he doesn't really have family his friends are his family is what i meant. how old are you do you think we are all teenages and can't see when someone is chatting bob. now eff off.

Man why are you being so aggressive. I had my doubts too but kept them in. There's no use starting a long <banned word filter activated> argument thread that will end in people getting banned like Auzer's thread did

[curioustoknow]

I think your a liar. Who works for nothing but just lets some one pay the rent. How did you pay bills, food, clothes look after your kids? That is just stupid. your story is ridiculous, native american lori who found allah - like where? Oh yeah when somone asks you something you just change the story abit. Like he doesn't really have family his friends are his family is what i meant. how old are you do you think we are all teenages and can't see when someone is chatting bob. now eff off.

Wow...seriously? Is cool if you don't believe me, but do you have to be so mean? I mean not compare myself to such a great man, but take Guru Nanaak as just an small example, and please don't take offense it, please, but he kind if led the same life, am I right?

I mean why is it so hard to believe that a person does not care about material possessions or money or all of these worthless things will not get you anywhere but stressed out?

My story is true and I don't care what you think, but try to be just a little bit understanding...and I'm truly sorry if I offended anyone