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warrior*princess
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I don't think the faults of our parents are good enough to justify going into Manmat.

If our parents aren't Gursikhs and aren't able to find a suitable Gursikh partner, then there's always the option of getting something arranged through Gursikh sangat.

I've heard of many cases of Gursikhs being born to Manmukh parents. Instead of relying on their parents to find them a partner, the Gursikh's own sangat arranged something.

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How would the Gursikh go about finding a partner without any outside interference?

Would he/she base his choices off of infatuation? Probably not since he/she's a Gursikh right? So we've eliminated looks as a way to find a partner.

What other criteria is there? Keeping in mind that everyone is his/her brother or sister (a hukam from Guru Sahib that we can't disobey unless blessed with Anand Karaj ceremony) would he go and find out how much rehit each individual girl/guy keeps? I'm guessing this Gursikh would then choose the girl/guy that does the most paatt/simran right?

Is that what you have in mind GKD?

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jaapnaam singh, veer ji no matter how gur-sikh a person is, sometimes they still notice ppl

and its not about looks its about personality and then for a gur-sikhs the persons level of sikhi

yah tha's what i'm saying G, a gur-sikh my fall for a person who has a certain level of sikhi, and because of that sikhi

after all a gur-sikh is a human?

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But GKD,

The whole foundation of the relationship would be based off of infatuation/crush, etc.

Here's a good post I found on the whole topic:

This concept of crushes is very very common. If it happens, I won't say "my god, you terrible person...you're going to hell". It happens because of a weakness and it's best to analyse how this happened, and cut the probelm at the root.

Most commonly, the reason is curiosity. "Wow, it'd be great to have a bf/gf". It seems like a very attractive option. But honestly, of all the people we see who have bfs/gfs, how many are happy? How many are content? Doesn't the answer automatically lead to the question...then why would I be any happier if I were like them?

Another common cause is that the person we have a "crush" on, is a figment of our own imagination. It's not to say that the person doesn't exist, it's to say that what they are in our minds, is not real. I may see "Boy X" from a far and think "wow, he's great...he'd be so kind and listen to me and be such a great person!" when in reality, you know nothing about that person. In such a case, most people tend to have a crush not on a person, but on a concept. And they create a person to fit the concept. Understand what I'm saying?

The final test is this: the person I'm obsessing over, if he or she was horribly disfigured, would my feelings change? Be honest with yourself. In most cases they would.

Crushes are usually the creation of an idle mind and a sense of boredom. The solution is definitely gurbani and nam and it can also be to occupy yourself with something else in life.

That's my

take.

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