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What Should I Do


Guest Singh In Need
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Guest Singh In Need

i am a 27 year old sikh male who was happly married with two children, until i found out that my wife of five years is having an affair with another male. I am amrit dhari sikh and my wife is amrit dhari was well. Before people on this thread start saying have i got any proof well I have photos of her with this home wrecker hugging and kissing. I have yet to confront her on this issue i would ask for suggestions of how to handle this situation.

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Confront her... If she's sorry then forgive her... Otherwise ask her to think about the children and if that doesn't make anything better... get your parents involved... Tell your parents... you'll feel better...but first talk to her...listen to what she's gotta say...

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Waheguru. I think you need to contact the Panj Pyare and ask them to speak to you and your wife together and figure out a solution. She must confess in front of the Panj Pyare. I also suggest you try talking to her and asking her why she is doing this. It may hurt you that she is doing this... And her reasons may be even more hurtful... But it is important for her to know that you know, and for you both to talk about it with each other. All the best and do Ardas for guidance!

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im not married myself, so im probably not the best person to give out advice.

but before you start making decisions such as leaving her or getting people involved. The first thing you should do is talk to her. It maybe the most difficult option, but you have to just talk to her. Tell her about the photos, and hear her side. Do ardas that you are able to accept mahrajs sweet will. I know its probably gonna be really tough for you but dont forget you've got mahraj on your side. Its reallt sad that shes amritdhari and shes done this :) and youve got kids...... try and put there needs first. its horrible growing up when there so much tension between your parents.

sorry if ive said anything wrong, maybe you should contact older gursikhs from the tapoban forum.

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Guest The facts

When a married Amritdhari commits adultery, this is considered the most serious of the Kurehats. In my opinion advice such as 'forgive her', 'talk to her' are from individuals who have no experience with relationships or married life. The current situation shows so many factors are missing in the relationship with your wife. Such as her lack of trust+open ness, respect for your own relationship, respect for the children, loyalty, and that she feels she needs to look elsewhere for affection, this to me suggests she sees something missing in her current relationship and it is beyond repair.

My advice would be to consider seperation as hard as it may be, the type of person you are dealing with is not an appropriate figure either as a spiritual guide for yourself or as a maternal figure for your children. You mention the person she is cheating with is the 'home wrecker', I would disagree and say she is the main home wrecker. Since you have hard evidence of her infidelity, in a divorce situation the law would be completely in your favour.

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waheguruuuuuuuuuuuuuu

My brother im sorry for the suffering u must be going through at the moment.............coming from a broken home i can understand the concern u must have towards ur children...........i suggest you confront your wife but plz restrain ur krodh.........arrange to see ur panj pyaareh but make sure she is aware of u knwoing about her Bujjer Kuriet activities..........i cant believe she would do something like this firstly being amritdhari and secondly, having two beatiful children...........

But seek the advice of the the Panj Pyaareh and they will guide u both...........dont hold back to them and tell then exactly how u feeling.........

I pray this all works out well for you veer jee and keep ur sikhi strong

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

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I'm sorry to hear this brother, but the other guys who have replied are right in saying that you do need to talk to her first. Show her the photos and hear her side... I know it seems highly unlikely, but there may even be a simple explanation for these photos. If she does confess and is sorry, then maybe you should give her a second chance purely because there are children involved. I myself grew up without a father, and there are some things that cannot be replaced, so I would forgive her this once only.

Hope it all works out for you

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Im sorry to hear about this bro ...

One thing you might want to consider and i thought about it reading your initial post. Can it be a possibility those pictures are of the 'past' and not present? Like BEFORE you guys got married?

And i agree with everyone, that above all and foremost before you get anyone involved in this matter, you should confront her first.

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