Running Away From Home

[Guest girl]

Bhainjee, personally, I think there's a solution to every problem, but every situation is different. If its affecting the safety/well being of you and/or your family member then yea you should. Have you tried seeking counselling from a professional counsellor, I would suggest to see one whom you or your family doesn't know and see what they think, they have experience in these types of situations. BUT, if you think that running away is the ONLY solution then its best to possibly do a search online for stories of people running away from home and their experiences, I don't think anyone here has ever run away from home so they wouldn't be able to tell you, but I'd advise doing some research before you go through with it.

Secondly, make sure you have it planned out, you have enough finances to cover your move, etc. Maybe you want to leave a note back? These are all questions you want to ask yourself. You're an adult now and can make your own decisions and live life how you want to live not how you're told to live.

If you decide to go through, make sure you do ardaas and understand the hukamnama it can only help you.

Advice appreciated.

[Guest Guest]

ok so there is some kind of threat being imposed on you right? violence as you said. Ok im not a scoail worker but i do a similar role. I have had girls run away from home beofre in similar situations. This can be sorted out the proper way. Family mediation etc... the world is a big ugly place sister and you dont want to be in it alone. There is help out there before you take this drastic step... Do you live in Sandwell at all? if so i can try and help you.. and if i cant help you i can direct you to someone who can. Sometimes running away seems liek the only way, but once the reality of what you have done hits you, its just too hard.. Think about it..

[Guest Guest]

There are practical solutions to every problem.

First take sharan of WAHEGURU jeeo and let go of ego.

Major cause of trouble is due to ego problems.

Listen to Gurbani and do Ardas in front of Guru Sahib jeeo.

On the other hand if you are still interested in reading my manmat then

here are other options.

1. Take a break, do seva or social service.

2. A vacation to relax and taking time to decide future course of action, can go to a Sikhi Camp.

3. Can visit relatives in India, see historical Gurudwaras.

4. Enroll your self for higher studies in some other city or country.

5. Take a part time or volunteer job like (Community Service Volunteers www.csv.org.uk/ )

6. You can opt for an early engagement or marriage.

If you like to know of any other alternatives then let me know.

[Guest girl]

ok so there is some kind of threat being imposed on you right? violence as you said. Ok im not a scoail worker but i do a similar role. I have had girls run away from home beofre in similar situations. This can be sorted out the proper way. Family mediation etc... the world is a big ugly place sister and you dont want to be in it alone. There is help out there before you take this drastic step... Do you live in Sandwell at all? if so i can try and help you.. and if i cant help you i can direct you to someone who can. Sometimes running away seems liek the only way, but once the reality of what you have done hits you, its just too hard.. Think about it..

I realise it's an ugly option. But i see the time arriving very soon. I'm not keen on family mediation because there is one thing my family and I totally agree on and that would be privacy. We have tried communication, and i can safely say i've exhausted that channel. It's difficult to appease the ego of a stubborn adult. These tirades do sound typical of a lost little girl, i'm well aware of that, but rest assured i do realise the gravity of what i'm about to do. I was just hoping for help planning it. I'm not near Sandwell. How could i contact you?

[Jangal Da]

If your staying with your family will put someone in serious danger of harm (not assumed danger), then you must act in the best interest of what you think is morally right.

I respect your right not to go into details here, but do go over things with someone - a teacher, trusted older friend or relative, Samaritans, counsellor... Then make the decision for yourself.

Do not just think of logistics (job>income>rent,food,bills), but think about the consequences (good and bad), of your action and the potential of any 'baggage' that you carry to hit you at some point like a scorpion's sting.

Above all maintain your health - physical and mental. The latter especially, as I personally know for a fact that many run-aways are at greater risk of developing a spectrum of psychaitric problems.

At 19y and doing this alone will be a monumental struggle and I can only hope that Waheguru guides your path - for some of us it will be a very hard and painful path, but never forget Waheguru and overcome the 'test,' for ultimate victory in life.

[Nehmat]

I ran away once...

I was so sick of my dad and his controlling problems that I had a fight with him and ran away...

I couldn't think about taking my clothes with me or anything else because really I was too angry to think about these things and I wasn't expecting to run away anyways...

I was so maddddddd so maddd that I just kept driving and hadn't a clue where I was going...

To my luck I saw a nishan sahib and knew a Gurudwara must be coming up on the way...I went into the Gurudwara...It was Maharaj ji's plan to keep me driving his way...

I went into the Gurudwara...And you know what... Path was going on and the first thing I heard through Gurbaani was:

"Let go of that ego you fool, why are you wasting time involving yourself with other people, you are here to jap naam, don't waste time in getting angry over things/people, these things will make you a coward who doesn't have the strength face situations and accept the lord's HUKAM, recite the naam of the lord and you will find peace"

I sat in the Gurudwara sahib for six hours, I believe...It was worth it...

Then Maharaj ji gave me a thought about my mom...about how hard life will be for her without me...She'll be in a horrible state...That was it...I did Matha Tek and thanked Waheguruji for pulling me towards him...and went home...

Overall...my run away plan was a flop...

However, life changed! Maharaj ji was right...reciting naam is actually peaceful...

You should try it...It's not about if you understand Gurbaani or not...It's about trying at first and then trust me Gurbaani itself will reveal its meaning to you...and you'll love it...

Start off with saying waheguru for 10 mins a day...it'll flip over your life for the good...

How old were you?

19 years old... =)

[fists_of_fury]

please make an account and pm me, got some info/experience for u that could help.

[Guest Guest]

bhenji please email me at khalistani_lioness@hotmail.co.uk x thanks.....i know from personal experiences with another member of my family what happens when u run away

[Guest girl]

There are practical solutions to every problem.

First take sharan of WAHEGURU jeeo and let go of ego.

Major cause of trouble is due to ego problems.

Listen to Gurbani and do Ardas in front of Guru Sahib jeeo.

On the other hand if you are still interested in reading my manmat then

here are other options.

1. Take a break, do seva or social service.

2. A vacation to relax and taking time to decide future course of action, can go to a Sikhi Camp.

3. Can visit relatives in India, see historical Gurudwaras.

4. Enroll your self for higher studies in some other city or country.

5. Take a part time or volunteer job like (Community Service Volunteers www.csv.org.uk/ )

6. You can opt for an early engagement or marriage.

If you like to know of any other alternatives then let me know.

Thank you for your suggestions. Unfortunately, in the severity and imminence of my situation, options 1, 2, 3 and 6 are near enough impossible. I'm already involved in 4 and 5.

[Guest girl]

If your staying with your family will put someone in serious danger of harm (not assumed danger), then you must act in the best interest of what you think is morally right.

I respect your right not to go into details here, but do go over things with someone - a teacher, trusted older friend or relative, Samaritans, counsellor... Then make the decision for yourself.

Do not just think of logistics (job>income>rent,food,bills), but think about the consequences (good and bad), of your action and the potential of any 'baggage' that you carry to hit you at some point like a scorpion's sting.

Above all maintain your health - physical and mental. The latter especially, as I personally know for a fact that many run-aways are at greater risk of developing a spectrum of psychaitric problems.

At 19y and doing this alone will be a monumental struggle and I can only hope that Waheguru guides your path - for some of us it will be a very hard and painful path, but never forget Waheguru and overcome the 'test,' for ultimate victory in life.

I understand what your saying bhaji/bhainji. But as you said maintaining one's health is vital and thus i need to prepare for the monumental struggle this is going to be in the physical sense. Preparing myself mentally only i can do and therefore i'm here for help on the logistics, as oppose the morality of what i'm about to pursue.