Flirting

[Mehtab Singh]

I don't think its as severe as "breaking" your Amrit. Amrit can't be "broken", its the individual who falls short of fulfilling the commitment(s). I can understand how some of us have a friendly and open nature and so once in a while may pass funny comments to someone of the opposite gender. Ultimately its all about what your intention is. If it is just a joke, I personally wouldn't care much. But if you have ulterior motives like "hitting" on the person, or trying to get "close" in order to start "something", then its a shame that an Amritdhari would do such a thing. But don't blame yourself and feel guilty. Get up and move on. Best touchstone at such times is to ask yourself "Would I say/do this in front of Sahib Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji Maharaj?"

We are not one of those who believe that talking to the opposite gender is outright wrong, however, being an Amritdhari you got to live by some rules, there are certain clear cut restrictions for you, and for your own good. Gurujee didn't put these restrictions on us to enslave us, rather He freed us from all sorts of manmade inhibitions. The restrictions that we have are like the ones that a doctor prescribes to his/her patient, and that is for their own good. If you are feeling guilty, do a wholehearted Ardas to Maharaj and ask for forgiveness. He accepts and loves even the worst sinners, and you, I am sure, are among His beloved children. So don't worry, be true to Him and to yourself, and you'll be fine.

[Guest _gupt singh_]

hey lol... how u guys even think abt it.... guru maharaj says... *dekh parai changia mava pena dhia jaane*

****dyiK prweIAW cMgIAW mwvW BYxw DIAW jwxY]

dhaekh paraaeeaaa(n) cha(n)geeaaa(n) maavaa(n) bhainaa dhheeaaa(n) jaanai||

The Sikh ought to treat beautiful women of others as his mothers, sisters and daughters.****

****eykw nwrI jqI hoie pr nwrI DI BYx vKwxY]

eaekaa naaree jathee hoe par naaree dhhee bhain vakhaanai||

Having one women as wife he (the Sikh) is a celibate and considers any other's wife his daughter or a sister.****

soo for gursikh every1 of dere age is brother or sister... so guys how can u flirt wit ur borther or sister????

ithe quetion karan to pehla guruji nu v kadi puchlea karo jiii

waheguru

bhul chuk maaf

G Singh

[CaptainQ]

flirting is wrong. end of topic lol

read this chapter from 'Say Kinehiya', autobiography of Sant Baba Harnam Singh Jee Rampur Khera Wale

THE WILLPOWER OF BABA JI

Baba Ji used to mention that during the years he spent serving

sadhu Santokh Das in his village, one day he casually told Baba Ji that,

"When a youth steps into manhood, he should lower his gaze, as a mark

of humility. For those who do not, are often deceived by what they

see." The sadhu's words became engraved on Baba Ji's heart. When

Baba Ji was returning home that day, a young lady was turning the

corner into the street. Upon seeing Baba Ji, this young lady pulled her

veil over her face, as was the custom in those days (as a measure of

modesty young women would cover themselves in front of men). Baba

Ji thought, "This woman covered her face in my presence because she

considers me to be grown up. I must therefore behave like an elder and

lower my gaze."

The next day, when Baba Ji was going towards the fields to work,

a respectable elder from the village saw him passing and called out to

Baba Ji. On calling him over he said, "Harnam Singh, I need to advise

you on a matter. Do not take it wrongly." Baba Ji replied very politely,

"Bapu1 Ji, please say what you must without hesitation, I trust it will be

for my benefit only." The old gentleman said, "Man's youth is like a

flooded river of emotions. If one loses their foothold in the water, you

are carried with the water and only good fortune of your destiny can

save you. You are deeply religious, even in your youth. Be vigilant of

the mind and careful of your emotions. Do not look upon anyone with

vanity or lust. That's all! This alone is the way to save yourself from

misdeeds."This advice from the elder reinforced Baba Ji's earlier

conviction. Miraculously, the old man's words sank deeply and firmly

into his being. This incident gave Baba Ji such great fortitude and

willpower that, for the 34 years he lived amongst his family and the

village, he never looked upon another woman with bad intentions. He

would go about his daily work, in and around his house with his gaze

lowered, in respect and humility. As a result, of this thinking, lustful thoughts would never arise in his mind or cloud his conscience. Except for his mother, Baba Ji would avoid trivial chitchat with other women.

Thus, in his behaviour, he fulfilled the words of Bhagat Namdev Ji…

He who forsakes another's wealth

He who forsakes another's woman

Near him alone does

God (the man lion) abide

par Dhan par daaraa parharee.

taa kai nikat basai narharee

(Bhagat Namdev Ji, page 1163)

He whose eyes gaze not

Upon the beauty of another's wife

Who serves the holy Saints lovingly

taa kai nikat basai narharee

saaDh kee tahal satsang hayt.

(Gauri Sukhmani 5th Guru, page 274)

These lines of Gurbani became the pillars of Baba Ji's chastity.

He did not feel any temptation from desires, in attaining spiritual heights.

He believed that the eyes play a major role in making our mind wander

outside. Whatever a man sees with his eyes, is received by the mind

and under the attraction of materialistic things, the mind then wanders

outwardly. The more we try to control this extrovert nature of the mind,

the quicker we'll be able to concentrate our mind on meditation. All

spiritual achievements are proportional to the concentration of our mind.

It is essential that the mind be controlled, by restraining the eyes.

http://www.rampurkhera.net/files/sekinehiya2006.pdf

so the question is, if Baba Jee had such a strict budhi bibek of not looking at another bibi for 34 years and doing 32 rosaries of 108 bead mala a day; then how can such a thing like "innocent flirting" be acceptable?!?!

lol i think its called a rhetorical question. am i making sence?? lol

[Guptkaur1]

You cant 'break' amrit. You can break your rehat..but not amrit.

Flirting wouldn't is not considered a bujjer kurehit so if u were to do it you wouldn't have to go for pesh.

As it has been said in a previous post..look at others as you sisters/brothers.fathers/mothers.. etc

Talking to the opposite gender is fine..i think it would be wrong to say your not allowed. We 're all part of guru gobind singh jee's khalsa.. we should get spirtual guidance off eachother..learn a few things from eachother.

But then..it can get out of hand. Its all about ur intentions and guru jee knows all.

Jus to repeat what some else has said..which i thought was brilliant. If guru jee was sittin here...would u do it/say it?

WAHGURU WAHEGURU!

[sherlsurj]

i think i have just been shut up!!!!!and thats hard to do

im wrong...thanks for letting me know in such a nice way. flrting with sister yukkkkkkkkkkkk

[Guest Kaur551]

I once read in a post that in order to avoid kaam you must stop talking to the opposite gender COMPLETELY. You can't look at them, talk to them, text them, etc.

It seems just SOOO harsh and weird. I talk to boys and I have brother/sister or friendship relationship with them and I'm amritdhari.

The person who wrote that post was so wrong and mistaken!! Talking with ppl is okay but just don't like, get all physical with them, or do anything that will make you get farther from Guru Ji.

[Wingz23]

............... dont flirt at all.... whether youre amrit dhari or not