Should I Do This Pooja?

[Guest REP]

I'm 25 with no job and various other problems. I am a keshdhari singh and believe in going to the gurdwara as the route out of any problem. I am heavily against poojas.

The thing is, my mother is not as sikh inclined as me. She used to do sukhmani sahib paat and maybe still does now and then. She has grown really worried and tired of me not having a job and my general condition, so out of being very desperate she went to see an astrologer behind my back.

The astologer told her a few things about me which were quite accurate. He also told her that people who were born when I was born, we have all been pretty messed up due to the alignment of certain planets. He also told her that during my life, there are two rakshas (demons) who are constantly messing with me and my life. They won't let me apply myself to anything and are out to disturb the peace.

He told my mum that the only way out is to do repitition of OM NAMO SHIVA 125000 times and then do a pooja. The thing is, he has said that I have to be present at the pooja.

My mother is more desperate than me to see me out of this and she is losing the plot over it. Shes telling me I have to go the pooja or she'll never talk to me again. My dad and sister are very worried over what shes going to do if i dont go. Last week she flipped out over this, because i keep telling her i wont go as it is against my beliefs but she does not listen. She really flipped and unfortunately she was holding a gurbani gutka at the time. She threw it hard on to the floor. We were all very upset over that. She didn't mean it but she lost the plot.

My sister believes she is very capable of hurting herself and it is affecting everyone. My dad is a heart patient and he is very streseed over this too. He told me for my mums sake, go the pooja but just do mool mantra in my mind and thats it. He said go just so that my mum is happy.

What do you all think i should do, i dont know what to do. It is completley against what i believe in. I'm going to feel like an <banned word filter activated> at the pooja, a sardar partaking in some ritual i dont believe in. But if i just have to sit there, maybe i should just go and just keep saying waheguru in my mind if my mothers health is at stake?

Does anyone even know what happens at these sorts of poojas?

Thanks for reading, i know it was a bit long

[Balait_da_Sher]

I know someone like you. I tell him all the time, turn this whole thing upside down. You say you don't have a job. Then apply for anything and everything. Once you get any job then you will not feel so helpless. As they say, beggars cant be choosers so don't have any expectations from the job,just get a job. This is what i tell my friend.

It is difficult to give you advice without knowing whether you have any qualifications. If you dont then get some. 25 isn't that old. Do a course in college and get a job in some office as an admin etc.

she is telling me I have to go the pooja or she'll never talk to me again. /quote]

I just went through this. Parents wanted me to do something which i didn't want to do. So they said they wont talk to me. I said ok you do that. So we didnt talk for a week. Then after that things just turned to normal.

If it was me i would tell her that you will do the pooja but you will not speak to her after that. See what she says. If you refuse to listen to her flat out, you will give her a reason to do something. If you turn the tables and say yes you will do it but she will loose you, then now she has to make the decision.

[Matheen]

Don't do it, keep faith in Guru Sahib and keep doing ardas, seva etc. Gurbani says that people who beg from many doors are no better than dogs.

When Bhagat Namdev Ji was being tortured to convert him to Islam, his mother asked him to start saying Allah, to please the Muslims but he refused on principle and disowned his mum. I guarantee that your mother will not stop talking to you - it's just emotional black mail. Do ardas for her as well.

[SunSingh]

there are different viddhis for getting jobs etc written in sankat mochan granth. read the granth and do those methods, this kind of pooja is inline with Gurmat so there's no problem. u can d/l the granth from PJS or khojee link on scribd, see my signature at bottom of my post.

[Guest mehtab1singh]

Amritdhari Singh from Brahmin family responding...hope it makes sense...I was in a similar situation once...

The astologer told her a few things about me which were quite accurate. He also told her that people who were born when I was born, we have all been pretty messed up due to the alignment of certain planets. He also told her that during my life, there are two rakshas (demons) who are constantly messing with me and my life. They won't let me apply myself to anything and are out to disturb the peace.

If possible, find out who this astrologer is, find out where he is at, and when you get a chance, make sure you go see him, and once you have, promise me you make sure that he ends up in the hospital. This is something I wanted to do but couldn't, so you do the honors.

He told my mum that the only way out is to do repitition of OM NAMO SHIVA 125000 times and then do a pooja. The thing is, he has said that I have to be present at the pooja.

Do Moolmantar 125,000 times, and before the pooja make sure he is admitted in the hospital. Problem solved!

My mother is more desperate than me to see me out of this and she is losing the plot over it. Shes telling me I have to go the pooja or she'll never talk to me again. My dad and sister are very worried over what shes going to do if i dont go. Last week she flipped out over this, because i keep telling her i wont go as it is against my beliefs but she does not listen.

My mom yelled at me once "What if I tell you that if you don't cut your beard, I will jump out of the window?". I kept quiet, but I was almost going to say "I will open the window". I knew she would laugh and so would I, but I kept my mouth shut. Now see, its not easy to see your mother in agony 24/7, it kills you, but you have to live with it.

she was holding a gurbani gutka at the time. She threw it hard on to the floor. We were all very upset over that. She didn't mean it but she lost the plot.

Sorry to say this but she has attracted a ship load of paap on her head.

My sister believes she is very capable of hurting herself and it is affecting everyone. My dad is a heart patient and he is very streseed over this too. He told me for my mums sake, go the pooja but just do mool mantra in my mind and thats it. He said go just so that my mum is happy.

My personal experience is that if you make one damn compromise for this world (especially family), they will make you do 10 million compromises after that. Put your foot down now and solve your issues forever.

What do you all think i should do, i dont know what to do. It is completley against what i believe in. I'm going to feel like an <banned word filter activated> at the pooja, a sardar partaking in some ritual i dont believe in. But if i just have to sit there, maybe i should just go and just keep saying waheguru in my mind if my mothers health is at stake?

I am telling you man, beat up that pandit and make sure he can't make it to the pooja. Then you get an excuse that its all the pandit's fault, and say that now I will put my faith in Gurbani. Simple!

Does anyone even know what happens at these sorts of poojas?

Don't worry about that. Everyone goes to have the sweet parshad.

I am NOT kidding about kicking the pandit. I regret I never got a chance to do that. I did request my dad to call some pandit home as I wanted to talk to him about all the trash he was telling my parents, but dad knew what I was upto. He knew the pandit will not go back in 1 piece if he came in front of me. My folks know enough astrologers (some within the family itself), but none dares to come in front of me (not yet atleast).

The easiest solution for you is to talk to this pandit in front of your parents, prove to him that nothing is above Gurbani, show him Gurbani quotes where Gurujee condemns such garbage, and shut him up. Make sure that your mom sees the pandit make a face like a terrified rat, and then she will know who is the real lion.

chakk de phattay Singha...dari na jotshi de bachey ton...khich ke rakh kamm...my parents are Brahmins as well, so it was worse for me...you are lucky your family is Sikh...it will take you half the effort...morchaa maar tu!!!!

[Only five]

Mehtab Singh, your awesome

One thing to add, Singh go in to the pandits hut with a kirpan and Bir Rass comin out of eyes. Show him how the planets and stars get alined.

[babbar_sher]

im sorry to say this but grow up man, you are 25 years old... time to take hold of your life and make your own decisions on what you think is right (which in this case you are). if you dont want to go then dont go, its as simple as that. you are not 16 years old anymore...you know very well that saying something a billion times isnt going to get you a job but a impressive resume and solid skills that are required in your field will get you a job. so work on improving those instead of hoping for a miracle...

tell your mother that you are not going to go because you do not believe in these rituals, show some courage and tell her that politely and also say that you are working on improving your resume and skills, explain your reasoning in a calm manner and tell her to be patient. im sure she will understand...

get any low level job in your field (or any field for that matter) for the time being so she can at least stop worrying about you... and then try to climb the corporate level from there onwards or work part time and study(bachelors, master etc etc) because if saying om navo shiva 125000 times can get you a job then i might as well say this too so i can become the next peyton manning :lol:

good luck though and let us know how things turn out to be.

[Guest mehtab1singh]

impressive resume and solid skills that are required in your field will get you a job. so work on improving those instead of hoping for a miracle...

good point.

tell your mother that you are not going to go because you do not believe in these rituals, show some courage and tell her that politely and also say that you are working on improving your resume and skills, explain your reasoning in a calm manner and tell her to be patient. im sure she will understand...

Punjabi mothers never understand yaar!

if saying om navo shiva 125000 times can get you a job then i might as well say this too so i can become the next peyton manning

Lets say he does om namo shivaaye 125,000 times and then gets the best job, dude, then he is stuck for life...because tomorrow no matter what happens, om namo shivaaye will become like tylenol...he will be asked to recite it even when he has pain in his shoulder after playing cricket...

fer har gall te mantar parrhne pene...ser dukhda te falanna mantar...gas hogi te falanna mantar...tidd khraab te falanna mantar...jindgi haraam hojugi bande di...thats 1 reason I gave my parents...I said if I do the stuff you say, and if things work out, tusi saari umar meri jaan khaa leni...chal eh kar, chall hun oh kar lai...I said no...Guru Sahib di apaar bakshish naal I got out of it easy, somehow!

Are you in USA? menu contact details de pandit di...ehnu phone karna pena...je aase paase hega te darshan vi dene pen sheyd...labb ke dass kitho da eh...ehnu dasda namo namo keenu karna...

[SunSingh]

sometimes, no matter how much we try, we can't get that top dream job we want. this is b/c we don't have the merit for it in our karams. i don't know about your merit as u may just plain and simple need experience from volunteering or something and that's different. the merit can be built up through seva and simran. the mantr the pundit gave was from different dharm, you can instead use something from our dharam. just japping gurmantr will build up merit. but sometimes, instead of a general medicine, it's better to use a specific targetted medicine, this is why i recommend a viddhi (technique) from sankat mochan which is written by shaheed bhai mani singh ji. it makes it easier to get what you want, the methods given reduce "friction" to that end. you of course, also have to be smart, make a plan, study, and work hard. there is no ignoring that. perhaps you should consider just getting a lower wage job to make ends meet for the time being while you go to school and study for what you want or while you search for what you really want. in this way the pressure will be reduced.

btw, some astrologer/pandit types believe in what they are doing, others are straight up swindlers.

[Guest MK]

Not sure how helpful this is, but astrology is actually only 30% accurate anyway (i heard a mahapursh say once, not sure who).............anyway before i got shot down for that......mool mantar repitition can change your fate to complete prosperity..

ALSO i see no harm him going for his mums sake, just do ur paath while. If it eases his mums anxiety, its fine. But put ur boundary after that, and say that it wont ever happen again. Then maybe do some darshan of a mahapursh and ask for his advice and get ur mum to see the mahaprush too, who can explain to ur mum the useless point of pandits. Btw they are not all legit anyway, they just say it for money.

Guys, his mum really is stressed and yep she will get some paap for dropping the gutka sahib, but that just shows how stressed she was. i aint saying it was justified, cuz it aint, i am sure we have all done some pretty stupid things when badly stressed. But its done now and hopefully maharaj will forgive her for it.

To the op, dedicate urself to do bani for a certain amount of days for the sole purpose of the worries, for example, 5 maleh of mool mantar for 40 days, i cant see how maharaj cant change it if its EVEN true. At least it will give u piece of mind, and u have done some bani to help ur soul.

Also,at the end of the day, make ur own decision, everyone here has given u there opinion, its very subjective...u just assess ur life, ur values, ur sikhi...and see what the best deciison is for that situation. Take on board what everyone says, but ultimately make ur own decision and stick to it and face the consequences if it..if any..which wil be either good or bad..........