Messed Up In The Head

[Singh559]

I can't give advice, but i know this would work:

Read Gurbani with faith and understand what Guru Sahib is trying to tell you.

[Guest Turbanated]

Bro what medicine did they put you on?

They put me on Citalopram. Its pretty mild but its known to help with OCD. It did I guess but it made my emotions numb.

[lionkingdom]

I'm a keshdhari sikh male in my mid twenties.

I have a pretty serious psychological problem. My turban and beard severely upset my mental state. I want to keep my hair but I am wandering if it would be better to go clean shaven.

I am not always like this but when I have a turban on, I feel like women despise me. They give me dirty looks thinking they are better than me, especially these indian women. Its not just a woman thing though. I feel like people are hating on me because of my turban. It makes me so paranoid. I can easily pick up a fight with someone when I get paranoid about my turban as it brings out a rage I cannot control. I was looking at this man the other day just glancing but then he must have thought I was looking at him with an intent to scare him so he looked back at me for ages. I went up to him and faced off for a fight because my paranoia got the worst of me and thought he was hating on me because of my turban and being an indian. I was a few moments away from a punch up but luckily my friend intervened.

I feel I am not healthy enough to be on the streets when I am in this condition. I have just come home now because I flipped out in the car at my dad and sister. They don't know what was bothering me but its the way some posh indian chick looked at me. After that, I was screw facing (staring with an intent to face off) every person on the road and I could feel that i was a moment or two from picking up a fight. Thats why I drove myself home and told my dad and sis to take themselves to where we were going.

Its not a healthy mind state. But I have it less when I wear a patka with my hair tied back. Only issue with that is that I get dirty looks from white people because I kind of look Islamic especially with my beard. I think wearing a turban has psychologically messed me up.

What should I do?

veer ji veer ji i think u sould try some pajeeri with {raisins}

[buddasingh]

The psychologist was for the paranoia and OCD. She didn't seem to be able to help. Used some CBT. The pyschiatrist mainly worked on my depression and some other things. I remember this happening in the past years ago and people with me would actually confirm my beliefs from what they saw. Its real man, but I guess I've been scarred by these experiences and maybe extra paranoid now and probably do misconstrue some (not all) of the situations.

I'm taking it a day at a time. I feel like when I am conscious of wearing my turban and remembering it as a crown which it essentially is, this makes me feel proud and gives me more confidence. Thats what I did today and i felt better. Less paranoid too. But then i'm not going to get too excited as i know from experience that this pride and confidence just goes up and down like crazy. Maybe one day it will settle, at high confidence and pride I hope.

Something doesn't quite make sense here bro. If it was real why would you be getting professional treatment for paranoia? It is very real to the person who is experiencing it and one must respect that experience. However, a psychologist should not be treating for paranoia if it does not exist. By the way good question by dalsingh101 as to what drug you were put on. A side effect of citalopram is paranoia. Not sure how prevalent it is but this link will shock you but also perhaps give you hope. http://rxstories.com/celexa.html

Keep in mind that even if we were qualified we could not give you professional opinions on a forum. So don't try any drastic med changes etc. without professional guidance and support. You may feel better initially only to have something else become much worse. Find out who the best mental health professional/psychiatrist is in your area. Try to establish a rapport with that person. Take it a day at a time...these things can take a bit of trial and error and time to stabilize.

Research everything you can. Read up as much as you can. There is simply too much information out there for professionals to have it all at their fingertips, but you can sometimes get to know things pretty well and be educated to assist your psychiatrist assist you.

Mental health issues aside... to the extent anyone experiences others laughing or looking at them because of their dastar; in my experience I am walking with superpowers with my dastar. When I am recognized in a positive manner, it's humility; if i'm recognized in a negative manner I still get a charge of positive power and energy. I may do any of ignore, educate, challenge, confront the person. Regardless I am in control of that my world and assume control of that persons world. This is the only way I've known how to wear the dastar from fights in younger years to moving forward and seeing more systemic discrimination and only the odd encounter. I am always the one laughing. I can't tell you exactly what is going on for you and don't have it all figured out myself... but enough to assure you that the dastar of a Sikh worn properly as a Sikh will let you rule the world.

[Guest Turbanated]

buddasingh, the treatment for paranoia by the psychologist was a different kind of paranoia. Specifically, it was the belief that some people can read my mind, especially holy people in the Gurdwara. It wasn't the paranoia I mention in this topic. I didn't really want to mention that, thats why I didn't before hand. We (me and the psychologist) didn't really touch upon this issue, she mainly tried helping with the reading thoughts belief.

I actually found citalopram helped with my paranoia. It was worse before I started taking it and now that I am off it, I see it coming back a bit. The main side effect of it was the numbing of my emotions. That's why I had to come off it.

[Guest bored_sardar]

I don't wear pugg nor do I have a beard, but from my own personal experience, having a history of mental health issues in the past, I can tell you that it isn't easier having no turban or beard, it can be just as painful, and people do give you the same rubbish on a day to day basis. Look at it this way, there are plenty of Gursikhs out there who are doing well in life, I'm sure people give them a hard time as well, but they have to take it no matter what, so don't let this put you down. Do you maintain an active social life or do you find yourself at home most of the time..? All the best and wjjkwjkf.

[Guest Turbanated]

I don't wear pugg nor do I have a beard, but from my own personal experience, having a history of mental health issues in the past, I can tell you that it isn't easier having no turban or beard, it can be just as painful, and people do give you the same rubbish on a day to day basis. Look at it this way, there are plenty of Gursikhs out there who are doing well in life, I'm sure people give them a hard time as well, but they have to take it no matter what, so don't let this put you down. Do you maintain an active social life or do you find yourself at home most of the time..? All the best and wjjkwjkf.

I've been unemployed for some time now. I'm mainly at home for now. Don't really have much of a social life at present. Meet up with a mate or two once in a blue moon. They're all working. Thanks.

[dalsingh101]

Brother, how able are you to 'disidentify' with your thoughts? Separate yourself from them? If you get what what I mean?

[Guest Turbanated]

Brother, how able are you to 'disidentify' with your thoughts? Separate yourself from them? If you get what what I mean?

I know what you mean. At one point, I could kind of do it well. But my OCD just doesn't allow it to happen most of the time now. I've had this obsessive thinking trait ever since childhood. I even had the urge to pull out my hair and did so many a time (in my case it was my eyelashes) when I was a young teenager. This is typical of OCD affected brains it is called trichotillomania. It is like a thorn in my mind, i've had this flipping thorn in my head all my life man.

[dalsingh101]

I think developing a detachment of yourself and your 'thoughts' is a good strategy to try? So the thoughts can come but you have a detachment from them, you ignore them, play them down, think of them as just 'thoughts' that you have a choice to 'get behind' or let waft away into the sky and evaporate. Let the person behind all the thought waves emerge, don't let the person be defined by the thoughts if you get what I mean.

How does your OCD manifest specifically? Anything else other than trichotillomania? Do you do compulsive cleaning for instance?

Was there any issues at home between mom and dad when you was younger? Brother remember not to give out any info that might compromise your anonymity in any response you may make.

I think a better way of seeing it is that you don't have a 'thorn in your mind', rather your mind generates thoughts of its own sometimes that aren't positive for you. Mine does too. I slowly learned to disidentify with the thoughts. Simran helped, although it was hard at first because the thoughts would keep popping up. But then you learn to just observe them without buying into them.

Do you think you would like to try this?