The When I Started Then I Stopped Thread

[sikhni777 838]

Habits can make or break a person. This change happens slowly without us realizing it. Then one day all of a sudden we stop to think and wonder - what went wrong there?

Developing a new habit can help you keep up with things. A new habit has to be a conscious thing. That means you need to have a goal to achieve. For instance you want to loose weight. Therefore you will start to eat healthy. When you start a new habit you will automatically drop a bad or less healthier one. The purpose of this thread is to make us aware of the good habits floating around. So this thread goes like this

GOAL : weight loss

When I started drinking black tea then I left drinking tea with milk.

GOAL: Spiritual awareness

When I started reading Sikh sangat I stopped reading mumsnet

GOAL: Healthy Eating

When I started eating beans on toast I stopped eating paronthe.

GOAL: Controlling anger

When I started praying regularly I stopped shouting and negative talk

Please share and lets learn what others are doing too.

[khalsaman1 126]

This a great thread brother.

May I suggest one thing? Let's say "Waheguru has given me XX and I've stopped doing YY"

Remember the Guru's words. We humans are capable of nothing. Everything happens in Waheguru's will.

[sikhni777 838]

Thanks bro I'm a sis. You have made the thread even greater. Or Waheguru has made the thread greater through you.

[Bundha 619]

Our body is like a temple and we need to keep it clean outside and in.

Outside, because it houses our soul and if it does not function properly then we cannot concentrate on our soul.

So set goals for your body:

Lose weight; we can all do with losing a little weight.

Eat more greens. The deeper the vegetable colours are the better they are for the body, full of antioxidants.

Deep breathing exercises, good for calming the nerves and prepares the body for meditation.

Set goals for the soul: This is our main goal everything else is peripheral.

Set goal to get up amritwella.

Set goal to recite daily the panj banies.

Set goal to mentally do mutha-take of jyote of AkaalPurkh that resides within you.

Set goal to recite mool mantra whenever you are cooking or making a sandwich or making a cup of tea.

Think about what you are good at, if you doodle on pieces of paper then try taking up drawing. Do you have an eye for a good picture then try photography. Be creative , open your mind, be happy and keep Guru Jis name on your lips at all time.

[Bundha 619]

Try this, think of the person you hate the most or the person who hates you the most.

Now close your eyes and in your mind say "<Name of person>, Guru Nanak Dev Ji tay-ra bhulla karay"

do this every day for a week. This kills your hate, that bitterness, that negativity you have for this person starts to dissipate.

Guru Ji also blesses you. It is easy to say good things about the people we love but very hard to say positive things about those we hate. We then start to mold our mind away from negativity towards people and not only do we feel better but our Mann gets proper chittar, because he is the one who takes us down the wrong road.

Little changes make a difference, little changes we can manage in this hectic world. So make those little changes do not stay stationary make those changes. Make changes about naam and simran. One day do meditation on "nothing" clear your mind, the next day try 5 mallas of Waheguru, the next try 5 chaupai sahibs, the next just repeat Dhan Guru Nanak, Dhan Guru Nanak.

Make that change.

[kaurp 32]

wow, very nice idea to kill hate BUNDHA.i am surely going to try this cause when we have bad feelings for someone it disturbs our own peace.

[sikhni777 838]

Rangeele jiba har ke naye.

The first effort has to be made by your yourself...

then follows

so rang rangile har har dheyae

When Waheguru inspired me to start saying Waheguru then I just had to put a full stop on this sentence and go and do some simran.

After the simran session, it was Waheguru's meher that he gave me the strength to have this thought of remembering Waheguru. Be thankful for the Waheguru inspired effort which happened in the first place and pray it keeps happening.

[Bundha 619]

Have you ever noticed people who go to the Gurdwara and they have been going to the Gurdwara for years yet they are the same now as they were years ago. Nothing has changed in their lives they come to the Gurdwara do mutha-take, listen and go home. Some come to the Gurdwara, they even do sewa in the langar hall or elsewhere, for years, yet they remain the same. Why has meeting the sangat or doing sewa of the sangat not affected their lives? Why are they the same now as they were years ago? Why has all that bani all that sewa not had an effect on their soul?

Because it goes in one ear and out the other. They have not made a conscious effort to follow Guru’s path, they have not made a conscious effort to make changes in their lives to move closer to Guru Ji. To them going to the Gurdwara is just something you do on a Sunday and maybe meet friends and relatives. Even doing sewa has not the motive it should have. Rather than thinking that sewa to the sangat is sewa to the Guru, that sewa brings nimarta and humbleness, that sewa washes away your paap, that sewa is a form of bhagati and through it one moves closer to your Guru, instead it is more of a social thing and as such it does not bring about the changes within oneself that it should.

One example contrary to this, at Soho road Gurdwara there is a man who on weekends cleans the toilets. He cleans the bowls and the sinks and mops the floor and replenishes the toilet rolls and the soap. When I first saw him he was clean shaven, now years later he is keshdhari. Well done that man, I say. Your humbleness in cleaning the toilets (who amongst us would do this on a regular basis) has been seen and blessed by AkaalPurkh Guru Ji so positive changes have come into his life.

Apart from this person, I see the same faces week in week out, some come just for the langar and go home with full bellies. Some come and do sewa but then partake in langar and all that pun-dhaan built up is cancelled out, they go home with nothing it all balances out. We want to increase our punn/good deeds but if we write them off by eating all that langar then it all balances out.

If you are doing sewa then for that day why not abstain from langar, at least go home with something in your karmic account. I have seen sewadhars who do sewa and then sit down to double helpings of saag with extra adhakar/ginger and makkhi rotis with two full glasses of lassi. I am not criticising them in the least, it is Gurughar and it is Guru-ka-langar and they can eat as much as they like, however this is not what Guru-ka-langar is all about.

So make those changes, little ones, ones that you can cope with and progress in your life. Do sewa, very important, but make sure you take something home with you spiritual wise.

[simran345 2,500]

Singh ji, who are we to judge others like that?? Even if you have become a brahmgyani and have mastered yourself, then what is the point to judge others? They will receive what they will, it is better to focus on individual sadhana. We do not know what is going through there minds, so stop guessing?

I like these thoughts.

[sikhni777 838]

When you listen deeply to the wordcof God then nothing matters. For some reason one day the katha was so great that when I was having langar, I was just full of thankfulness. It was just dhal parshadha and I waa surprised that I was not yearning for the sabji too. However before I used to get upset when the halls full and you have to stand around. When people do hard physical seva however they need to eat their fill. We need to purify our mind and never judge how much others eat. Guru ghar provides for everyones needs. We are blessed to have langar. Guruji has thought of our every need.

I remember a sakhi about a bhagat ji whose wife was having to do extra work because they had a visitor. This was God himself testing her. One day her neighbour asked her why she has lost weight and she is very thin. She replied that their visitor eats a lot. The visitor disappeared and bhagat ji was very angry with his wife. So we need to remember this everytime we come close to looking at what others are eating. Take it as your test. It is a natural instinct to look into others plates.

[Bundha 619]

Maybe my English is not that good, this is not what I am saying. It matters not to me how much anyone eats in langar. Maybe someones langar was a bad example, I try not to not look down on anyone, eat as much as you like whenever you like in langar, it is all Gurus and He gives to all. What is am saying is don't look at another person plate, look at your own.

It is just that sometimes things need to be highlighted because they never occur to you and when they are pointed out it’s like "Oh yeah it never occurred to me", that is all.

Someone once asked me “Where does God reside?” I said “Within all of us” he asked “then when was the last time you did internal nimaskaar to the One who resides within you?” I was like “well it never occurred to me”. Sometimes things stare you in the face but they need pointing out and you can reap the benefit.

If you are doing heavy sewa and you need your fill then by all means go ahead and have as much langar as you like, have seconds, have thirds it is all Gurus kirpa. But if you want to ‘KHAT’ something, if you want to take home some good deeds that you have earned then maybe think again.

[jkvlondon 5,246]

Try this, think of the person you hate the most or the person who hates you the most.

Now close your eyes and in your mind say "<Name of person>, Guru Nanak Dev Ji tay-ra bhulla karay"

do this every day for a week. This kills your hate, that bitterness, that negativity you have for this person starts to dissipate.

Guru Ji also blesses you. It is easy to say good things about the people we love but very hard to say positive things about those we hate. We then start to mold our mind away from negativity towards people and not only do we feel better but our Mann gets proper chittar, because he is the one who takes us down the wrong road.

Little changes make a difference, little changes we can manage in this hectic world. So make those little changes do not stay stationary make those changes. Make changes about naam and simran. One day do meditation on "nothing" clear your mind, the next day try 5 mallas of Waheguru, the next try 5 chaupai sahibs, the next just repeat Dhan Guru Nanak, Dhan Guru Nanak.

Make that change.

reminds me of my Nani ji she would say to people who did her grief 'Rabb tera bhalley kare' and also 'nee tera vaeda taar jahe' she never ate until she fed all the jia of the household including janwar first ...always doing naam ...no surprise she got partak Darshan of Dhan Dhan Guru Teg Bahadur sahib ji in her lifetime (i only found out after her passing) never have a harsh word or more importantly thought for anyone she used to say , and people will remember your karam rather than your face so don't worry about what you see only what you do, and do right

[simran345 2,500]

" 'Rabb tera bhalley kare' and also 'nee tera vaeda taar jahe' "

Brings back memories of my elders too, lovely. ???

[Bundha 619]

It is a very simple belief but fraught with difficulty and one can waiver from the path without even knowing it, that is to believe in the ONE.

Dass Patshahia but the saroop is One. Choose whichever sarooop you are most in piyar with, be it Guru Nanak Dev Ji or Guru Gobind Singh Ji or any of the ten Gurus, believe and love that saroop like your own father, more than your father. Sometimes thoughts may arise that I am remembering Guru Gobind Singh Ji, what about Guu Nanak dev Ji ? Then you are moving into maya, into illusion, you are regarding them as different, but they are One. So bring your thoughts back, remember the One. If you remember Guru Goding Singh Ji or say, Guru Arjan Dev Ji that all dass patshahia will come for they are the same jyote.

Some remember devis and devtay but they are not mukhat themselves how can then give you mukhti? You remember a devi/devta then you will end up in his/her puri you will not get any further. Those Hindus who remembered or did aradhana of the One made it to mukhti. The Bhatts whose bani is in Guru Granth Sahib Ji scoured the land, found many sanyasi, pandits, tantrics but their mind was still on fire. They then heard of Guru Nanak Dev Ji and that on the Gurgudhi was fifth Patshah Guru Arjan Dev Ji as soon as they saw the wondrous vision their minds became cool and still. They did aradhana of the One and became mukhat. Raja Janak, Vyaas Rikhi, Dharoo and Parlaad all believed in only the One and became mukhat.

Remember the One, remember Guru Gobind Singh Ji and you are remembering the Almighty who pervades throughout the universe who is ‘enakh’ in His forms YET He is one, He is nirgun and sargun at the same time.

When you leave this world then we each make our own way to the court of Dharam Raj. Some will have to walk alone through nightmare landscapes naked and hot, some will have jamdhoot come for them, they will put you in chains and cart you off, some will find there is no way forward and are stuck here or along the way. Blessed are those who find Shaheed Singh/Singhnia waiting for them on the other side, blessed are those who have Sant Mahapursh waiting for them on the other side and words cannot describe for those who have Guru Sahib Ji waiting for them.

[sikhni777 838]

Would you kindly please explain further nirgun and sargun saroop. My boodhi seems too small to understand what it means.