Update someone help me with this

[Guest Jasmeet Singh]

This is an update on my post on 19th sept.

A lil bit background about us, I’m 21 year old kesadhari sikh male and she’s 20 years old atheist white female, we met through mutual friends. 

Turns out she didn’t have any objections with me having an unshorn beard. She was very respectful and understanding. 

that being said, I made a dumb mistake. We’ve been seeing each other everyday now and have come really close and she was inquiring about my religion and stuff, so I told her about our gurus and some stuff briefly like what do we believe in what are our values. She liked what she heard. Anyway we had a long talk and I gave her a spare kara that I had She took it, she’s been wearing it, and also she lives with her mum whom she told that I gave her that “arm ring” whos now really curious and wants to meet me. (kuri lives with a single mother).

how do I get out of this mess that I made? I shouldn’t have given her that, I don’t know what I was thinking. She doesn’t drink or smoke, she does eat meat tho. 

Im going to meet her mother, and I don’t want her mother to think that I got some shady intentions (like I wanna convert her or something) any suggestions how I get out of this pickle

waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh.

[puzzled]

this is just stupidity.  you would think that a confused 16 yr old kid would behave like that but your a grown 21 yr old man!   no sharam at all.   Shes a atheist so how you gnna do anand karaj with her if she doesn't even believe?   And kara was given to us by our guru you dont just go out handing it out like that.   and dont even think about sleeping with her   

 

[dallysingh101]

On 9/30/2019 at 10:19 AM, Guest Jasmeet Singh said:

This is an update on my post on 19th sept.

A lil bit background about us, I’m 21 year old kesadhari sikh male and she’s 20 years old atheist white female, we met through mutual friends. 

Turns out she didn’t have any objections with me having an unshorn beard. She was very respectful and understanding. 

that being said, I made a dumb mistake. We’ve been seeing each other everyday now and have come really close and she was inquiring about my religion and stuff, so I told her about our gurus and some stuff briefly like what do we believe in what are our values. She liked what she heard. Anyway we had a long talk and I gave her a spare kara that I had She took it, she’s been wearing it, and also she lives with her mum whom she told that I gave her that “arm ring” whos now really curious and wants to meet me. (kuri lives with a single mother).

how do I get out of this mess that I made? I shouldn’t have given her that, I don’t know what I was thinking. She doesn’t drink or smoke, she does eat meat tho. 

Im going to meet her mother, and I don’t want her mother to think that I got some shady intentions (like I wanna convert her or something) any suggestions how I get out of this pickle

waheguru ji ka khalsa waheguru ji ki fateh.

Anyone who gives a kara away to a nonSikh is a maha-murakh in my opinion. As a child maybe, but an adult.....

And we should REALLY bring this point home throughout the community. In the past, I believe it was loved-up, dimwitted apneaan who gave their tonday 'lovers' a kara. These went on to be passed around their community and used by some to fake a Sikh identity to entrap girls. So we need to be careful of karras and other Sikh symbols - not just because of whom they point at, but also because they can be used by our enemies too. 

The gora family are probably thinking what you've done means something really significant - like an 'engagement ring' or something. lol

If this gets serious, I hope you're not going to be another knob trying to have an Anand Karaj with a nonSikh in a Gurdwara. 

And from my experience, many girls, when they really like a guy (in the early stages), often seem to agree to anything a guys says. Overlaugh at crappy jokes etc. etc. 

My point is that when anyone fancies someone, when they have conversations with the said person - they often say what they believe, the other person wants to hear, or agree to lots of things - so I wouldn't take what she is saying to you as a genuine interest in Sikhi. 

If you had been a sullah she fancied and he went on about The Koran, she'd probably be lapping that up too. That's what guileless, loved-up girls do.  lol

Be clued up about these things.