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Erasing sins


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Guest Beginner

Hi

I was fortunate to have kirpa over 10 years ago, I was practicing well but then it all just went pear shaped. Cutting a long story short I went from practicing rehat to being a complete sinner. I spent many years drinking, tried drugs, and also committed a huge amount of bad lustful actions. I went from one extreme to the other. For a couple of years I use to drink and then get upset about how I threw everything away, the chance Waheguru gave me away but then slowly I forgot about that lifestyle and became comfortable in this new lifestyle of not thinking much about my Sikhi. I got married (to someone who doesn’t practice much sikhi, but now is taking a slight interest) and I also have three children. 

I have recently found the love again for Sikhi, I feel waheguru has given me a second chance by showing me the light again, I  am now trying to practice and change by waking up for Amrit vela, stopping meat, and alcohol too... not that I have drank on many occasions since uni. I want to change my inner self, become compassionate, control my panj Chor etc. I have realised I do not want to waste this life, I am thirsty for gyan and spiritual connection again. 

I am worried now, will I ever be able to erase the sins I have made over the last 10 years? Will simran do that or no matter how hard I try do I have no chance to obtain mukhti now?

I use it to always think I would marry someone who was a practicing sikh as I believed you are the sangat that you keep. I look back and wonder was it meant to be this way as in was I meant to meet my spouse who I never would have if I was wearing a dastar like before, were we meant to be like this as my spouse may also get into sikhi and this was our path? Or was there someone else I was meant to marry who was Amritdhari. As we have had a rocky marriage, due to my spouses drinking habbits. That’s a separate question but what’s stressing me out is the guilt of the sins I have committed. I feel disgusted in myself that I went against my Guru, especially the lustful actions. Can I ever pay for these sins in this lifetime and clear them before I leave? When I was younger I use to do simran and feel so much bliss, now I still haven’t got to that level, I get distracted and have to work hard to keep my mind from thinking too.
 

 

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10 hours ago, Guest Beginner said:

Hi

I was fortunate to have kirpa over 10 years ago, I was practicing well but then it all just went pear shaped. Cutting a long story short I went from practicing rehat to being a complete sinner. I spent many years drinking, tried drugs, and also committed a huge amount of bad lustful actions. I went from one extreme to the other. For a couple of years I use to drink and then get upset about how I threw everything away, the chance Waheguru gave me away but then slowly I forgot about that lifestyle and became comfortable in this new lifestyle of not thinking much about my Sikhi. I got married (to someone who doesn’t practice much sikhi, but now is taking a slight interest) and I also have three children. 

I have recently found the love again for Sikhi, I feel waheguru has given me a second chance by showing me the light again, I  am now trying to practice and change by waking up for Amrit vela, stopping meat, and alcohol too... not that I have drank on many occasions since uni. I want to change my inner self, become compassionate, control my panj Chor etc. I have realised I do not want to waste this life, I am thirsty for gyan and spiritual connection again. 

I am worried now, will I ever be able to erase the sins I have made over the last 10 years? Will simran do that or no matter how hard I try do I have no chance to obtain mukhti now?

I use it to always think I would marry someone who was a practicing sikh as I believed you are the sangat that you keep. I look back and wonder was it meant to be this way as in was I meant to meet my spouse who I never would have if I was wearing a dastar like before, were we meant to be like this as my spouse may also get into sikhi and this was our path? Or was there someone else I was meant to marry who was Amritdhari. As we have had a rocky marriage, due to my spouses drinking habbits. That’s a separate question but what’s stressing me out is the guilt of the sins I have committed. I feel disgusted in myself that I went against my Guru, especially the lustful actions. Can I ever pay for these sins in this lifetime and clear them before I leave? When I was younger I use to do simran and feel so much bliss, now I still haven’t got to that level, I get distracted and have to work hard to keep my mind from thinking too.
 

 

You’ll be fine. You’ll probably pay off the karmas for misdeeds you committed, eating meat not included as that’s okay, good for health and if you workout which you should be doing.. respect the body. 
 

God is all forgiving, we are led astray from the path and led back to it. Ultimately we dictate our own lives and you’ve chosen to walk the path again. External appearance doesn’t matter, stay pure internally recognizing God to be everyone everything everywhere, love everyone and everything as Him in Norboah and Nirviar and have no enmity for anyone. You will learn to forgive others as you are constantly forgiven and you need to forgive yourself, we all mess up and no one is perfect. 
 

Take care of your body mind and soul, ie work, exercise, mediate. And live everyday life, don’t dwell on the spirit world, Darshan etc. Be confident, happy and life a good life beyond the five thieves. Be good to others and yourself.
 

 

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