Leaderboard

Like my response to JSinghz who likes to impress a ban on everything not to his liking, we should encourage healthy debates and Admin should step in to delete posts that do not fall within house rules (I dont know what these are) but banning everything not to our liking is frankly communist ideology. I for instance had a run in with DallySingh but does that mean I hate his guts NO, would I sit with him and have a chat at a Gurdwara if I bumped into him, YES. Reminds me of the Sakhi when Maharaja Ranjit Singh bumped in to Sada Kaur at Harmandhir Sahib, arch rivals still sharing Degh, wow what a story!

I've read all the pages and I've made my thoughts very clear in my posts in this thread. I'd like the mods to close this thread because quite frankly this entire thread is a joke. The only thing this thread has confirmed is Sant Baba Jarnail Singh's prediction: There will only be Khalistan when we are all ready to be Khalsa. We can't even treat our fellow Sikh's with humanity. It's sad.

VAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA, VAHEGURU JI KI FATEH "We wouldn't be having these issues before the SGPC was formed" Sure we did - they were called Mahants and were under colonial British government control. Hindu rituals incorporated into Gurdwaras, ancestral claim to Gurdwaras as personal property, and many other unsavory things. Unfortunately, the Gurdwara Act 1925 still maintained government oversight over Gurdwaras and transitioned from British corruption to Indian government corruption and interference. "http://etheses.bham.ac.uk/3990/1/Riat13PhD.pdf" - pg. 122. I liked this. Read parts of it and it captured the problems of the post Raj period with Gurdwaras.

I think we all need to try and act like leaders ourselves. I think given the fiercely independent nature of many apnay, formal leadership often doesn't work too well with our community.

We are all human. Just because you feel tired and lazy does not mean you mean professional help - thats just my thoughts. I feel like I want a change too sometimes. You are the best judge of what your body and your mind needs. There are some days when you just need to rest. Nothing wrong with that. We are then able to deal with things in a more refreshed manner. Working out hard also requires you to rest your body - as the body needs time to repair itself. Working out causes small cuts to appear in the muscles - so only protein, the right nutrients and rest will get you back to normal. It is also important to replenish your body with some nutrients - especially a healthy fruit like banana within an hour post workout. This helps recovery faster. All in all you did well - achieved your goals which was having another drink free day.

Simple sangat stops giving daswand ...appey akkal tikana aaaju ...

Gurdwaras have become the playthings of the worst types of personalities to be found in our communities. Thankfully, a building is not a pre-requisite for joining with God. It becomes finding sangat that much more difficult, but I believe it's possible to go solo if there's no alternative.

Some 3,000 students are expected to attend the 47 Punjabi Education Centers (PECs) nationwide run by a unit of the Khalsa Diwan Malaysia (KDM) which began classes this week. http://asiasamachar.com/2016/01/10/5463/

Jealousy and Anger are just thoughts. If u can catch these thoughts as they occur, you can avoid reacting in anger. This is difficult to do at first because reaction is really fast but if u start realizing even after youve reacted: like ive just let anger win or let jeolousy consume me, then slowly u will start to recognize anger, jeolousy before it controls u. Then u will have to fight to subdue it. Sometimes u will lose because it feels good to lash out. But sometimes u will win. When thoughts of anger or jeolousy come dont be ashamed. We all have vices and they are powerful. But it is ur fault if u act on them or dwell on them. U r not ur thoughts. Also when ppl ask when just tell them its all wahegurus bhana or when its the right time or some other vague, smug answer to send them on their way. As per jeolousy, my mom used to say, no matter what we bring these kids fir vi dusare di cheej dekh ki halk pai janda (even if kids are well fed seeing others treats they go rabid) Your guru is samrath, capable of giving u many things, and he has given u lots of things so why like an orphan are u looking at other ppls things and coveting. Have sabar, patience, u will get it soon. Also one always notices what one lacks in other people. So tell similar things to ur mind to help it combat jealousy. For examply say, let others enjoy what they have, my mind, have bharosa my guru will give it to me too. PS have u thought about adopting?

God did NOT want us to be inactive brother. If there is anything that our Guru's taught us, it is this. We as individuals must constantly strive to uplift and improve not only ourselves but our community too. You have to realise and believe that you can help change things and not passively be on the receiving end. In my short life I've already seen some change for the better, if in nothing else - the younger generation are willing to face and discuss things in an open minded fashion that would never have taken place when I was a teenager. Probably helps that some of the new 'elders' aren't stifling conservatives...... <big myself up> lol

Hopefully I'm not talking out of turn here when I call them travellers or gypsies but some of these guys are hard as nails. They commonly settle scores internally with bare knuckle fights and they train their children to fight early on in the same way so they become hardened to face and body punches. A person trained in martial arts where full on contact is watered down in a fight against a gypsy will be a one way street to A&E.

Don't think about it until May time. See where you are at, then. Cross each bridge as it comes. Deal with things day to day for now. Until then keep doing what you're doing! Great to hear you're training!!! I use music a lot when I train. Put that mopey Coldplay stuff down! Play pumping music. Boast yourself up! Training legs occasionally (which I know can be a chore) might help because it stimulates the release of testosterone. Try that one day? Buy a cheap £10 pull up bar if you ain't got one already too. We're all rooting for you man!

I agree. And we've got a historical precedent for this with Sarbat Khalsa, where all and sundry were allowed to voice their opinions on things that effected the panth and themselves. There is absolutely no way forward other than debating and forming consensus. All of us are limited in our understandings due to bias, upbringing, experiences, lack of information/education, neuro-biological factors and whatnot. At its best, discussion is a brilliant way to explore perspectives that we might not be able to see on our own. This is much more healthy and likely to stimulate intellectual growth than just rigidly sticking to one stance until the end of time. We know the old school ways of our parents, where much was taboo and never discussed has caused its own issues with problems growing under our very noses whilst we turned a blind eye to avoid discomfort (like grooming and conversions for instance). I think some people want to continue along that vein rather than confront uncomfortable issues. This is no way forward and will only make things worse. The other thing is that with the growth of education throughout our community, and the increased availability of hitherto hidden/hard to get information, we are in a position where we are discovering more and more unknown (and uncomfortable) things about our past, be this 1984 or (especially) the colonial period or even events before that. People better get used to hearing and discussing things that make them uncomfortable if they have any sort of commitment to get at truth - warts and all. It's weak to live in some idealised bubble - not least of all because reality has a tendency to come along and burst it when you least need or expect it.

I remember listening to Parmjit Singh Anandpur Wale recently and the first thing we should ask for from Maharaj is Darshan before worldly mangaa. You're spot on, our Pralabadh Karams are what dictate these types of situations and as we have seen with Sarab Rog Ka Aukadh naam camps, anything is possible through massive naam abhyiaas, which is when Ardas is heard quicker.

The importance of good Sadh Sangat should not be downplayed as per Sukhmani Sahib and ਬਿਨੁ ਭਾਗਾ ਸਤਸੰਗੁ ਨ ਲਭੈ ਬਿਨੁ ਸੰਗਤਿ ਮੈਲੁ ਭਰੀਜੈ ਜੀਉ ॥੩॥ Without good fortune, the Sat Sangat is not found; without this Sangat, people are stained with filth and pollution. ||3|| But there is no doubt we are judged on our own actions and many Mahapurash have reached great heights doing bhagti on their own. ਦਦੈ ਦੋਸੁ ਨ ਦੇਊ ਕਿਸੈ ਦੋਸੁ ਕਰੰਮਾ ਆਪਣਿਆ ॥ Do not blame anyone else; blame instead your own actions. ਜੋ ਮੈ ਕੀਆ ਸੋ ਮੈ ਪਾਇਆ ਦੋਸੁ ਨ ਦੀਜੈ ਅਵਰ ਜਨਾ ॥੨੧॥ Whatever I did, for that I have suffered; I do not blame anyone else. ||21||

Obviously the buildings are not dysfunctional. The power hungry & kursi loving committees are responsible for running them like businesses and misuse of Sangats money is rife. The last thing on their minds is education Sikhi or worldly or with providing sports facilities.

I agree. Their ego conjures up thoughts such as, "Well, at least I'm not drinking and smoking like the rest of them" in order to placate their conscience when they sit around with their religiously inclined chums, partaking in chugliyan, and in other cases, a lot worse. But as long as there's no drinking and smoking, hey(?) As if these are the only two vices a Sikh is to concern him or herself with!

Ok Paji, I apologise, I got mixed up with the other id, Khalsa something which maybe admin. But you are the one that keeps going about it, not me. I ended it ages ago. You are right about creating own sins, but i said nothing wrong, so don't understand why you keep quoting my comments only. I also am speaking the truth, but I've established whats going on now. God bless you too.

The weather sometimes gets me down a bit I think. So all manner of factors can effect our mood and outlook. Got to say, a little dose of simran and paat, does often help pull me out somewhat. I think beside the spiritual, it helps by disrupting negative thought patterns.

Glad to hear that, Singh Ji. One gets the impression those who strongly assert there is no salvation for a Sikh unless he or she spends the bulk of their spiritual efforts in a group scenario, are usually the types of opinion espoused by those ensconced in the daily social hullabaloo of a jatha. For such people going it alone is either a terrifying thought that doesn't bear considering, OR they simply are unable to cultivate a direct, one-to-one relationship with God, instead choosing to delude themselves into thinking that others can do the spiritual heavy lifting that is required of the individual.

Relative to what's written in the article the large majority of Gurdwarey are dysfunctional. ape beej ape he kao, good Sangat help massively but in the end we are judged alone.

We went through a similar situation for 12 years. Everyone kept on asking us questions and we did feel down. However we just choose to ignore them. Approaching 35,I decided it did not matter anymore. The will of God was supreme. If he wished us to have a baby we will have one. My prayers just consisted of Tera kiya meetha laage. My mum in law pressured me into praying for a child. i just said yes all the time. I laughed off what people said - just took their comments lightly as jokes. We were taken to many places for a matha tek and prayers specifically for a child. When we started relaxing, keeping cool, and stopped worrying - it was the best. That is when we were blessed. So the best is to relax, dont blame others or yourself and blessings will arrive soon. Pray for strength to get past the situation. Hopefully it should not last too long. Soon everything will be forgotten as you get busy with the little ones - then you will miss these carefree days and understand that the worrying and jealousy were just a big waste of time. You could have done better, coz kids keep you so busy. They literally just come and take over your life.

Cheering you on bro. Somehow you're an inspiration to even those who don't drink. We can all do better for ourselves is what I'm learning from you. With respect to changing your circle and cutting people out, err on the side of caution. But if you are feeling strong enough, you can still interact with those people in other environments and do different things. They can be carefully planned so alcohol is simply not feasible. It can make things more difficult if you are not respected by them for your stance, plans change and you're tempted. However, it might also make things easier if you can maintain some social ties with very old friends. Drinking or not, friendships evolve over time and through life's stages. Be smart about it and it's OK to see the good in your old friends and still call them your friends.

A very good point made in the post above is to have a single answer that you can resort to whenever asked. Regardless of your personal situation, it's not a question that ever requires a direct answer. You can keep the answer as vague or even suggest a broader mind in your answer as you wish. I don't suggest the answer be too flippant as you should not have to deal with negative energy. The answer should take little energy. People ask like robots, insensitively. Sometimes it's for conversation and greeting more than an answer. Forgive them for that failure and reciprocate with as little thought as they have put into it. Your mind will magnify what is going on for other people because of your own situation.Keep in mind there are huge number of couples with similar challenges. Many good people struggle with the step prior, which is having a life partner. Other people also have behind the scenes personal struggles of all kinds, marriage, financial, health, trust issues, mental health, etc. Sikh bonds and love are no where near blood or DNA. Don't restrain from enjoying and loving life and contributing to your community. Every one of us can imagine different circumstances. We are all blessed in different ways. You have honesty and insight about your own feelings. That will go a long ways in keeping positive.

First of all, a sikh is a person who believes in God, the 10 gurus, Guru Granth Sahib and believes in no other religion. And believes in amrit and olans to take it someday. So yes both ur parents are sikhs and getting laha or profit from it. As for you, idk. It seems like u say u dont believe in god, but in reality do? I really think you should watch basics of sikhi you tube channel to learn what sikhi is and how it can fit in ur life and improve ur life.

Try to look at those that don't have children and how they cope with life. There are many in that position or have been through the same emotions and thoughts and you, but have children at a late age or not at all. It is Waheguru also that helps one through this, so who better to turn to for help in dealing with it? If the blessing of a child is in Gods will, then so is having the strength, patience and to deal with it. You are more likely to get this understanding from seeing those in similar situations as you. The unique homes children are a reminder that they came into this world, but don't even know who their parents are. There's no need to tell anybody anything personal, you just need the strength to be able to change the emotions, and not worry about not being excepted by society because one does not have children. On the positive side in your situation you are seeking treatment at a hospital, so there is hope in that. 30 isn't really that old, there's women that go past 40 and have similar problems. I know a lady who had a baby at 50, after giving up hope, so don't let it get you down. Be stress free for yourself and your wife as you don't want this to reflect on any treatment. Seek professional advice if you need help with it.

I hear this a lot from well-meaning types. The sentiment is welcome, but when has it, in recent memory, ever been practiced? It's all tied into politics and convoluted caveats. I don't doubt there's one-off cases that we don't hear about where it happens, but as a widescale, common occurrence it doesn't happen as much as we like to convince ourselves it does. In fact, it smacks of self-congratulatory aggrandisement that bears very little connection to the reality of what Sikhs are truly like in this day and age.

Don't underestimate me Paji, don't bring Waheguru into this as an excuse. Waheguru has given people free will too, and if somebody is going to make false statements about me, then I will defend it. You may call it stress, but to me it's self defence. Any Tom, D I c k or H a r r y cannot just go around making false statements about another when there is no reason too. If I made a comment, there fair enough he could write something, but where I've written nothing, what reason was there to bring me into it. Read what was written and if your name was against it, then tell me about stress. " But your message, with all its ignorance, reveals a hellava lot about the state of our people. The true extremely low intellectual state that we're in. I mean, your message above got a 'Like' thumbs up from Simran345. She's a girl. A Sikh girl and yet she's supporting and saying nothing should be said against a group of Sikhs that strictly only marry their own 1st cousins and believe that girls (wives) should only exist as sex objects there to sexually arouse their man. The fact that a Sikh girl could come to the defence of such people is a truly damning indictment of the state of our community as Sikhs and a very clear explanation as to why the Indians have a national stereotype of us being incredibly thick. " Slander definition = make false and damaging statements about (someone). Exactly what has been stated above in quotations, then tell me about stress. Are you seriously questioning me, when it's obvious who took the initiative to provoke a negative reaction? How many others do you ask this question too, when they write pages of junk? I think you need to concentrate on actual admin role, rather than making excuses for somebody else's stupidity. If you want a forum to work on a stressfree, and in the manners set out in the guidelines, then it would be wise to do it in line with them too. It wasn't stress, it's called self defence and standing up against negative comments to me, which you think one should listen to. I'm afraid that way of thinking is wrong. You asked me, why I get stressed over things? I ask you, why are you adding more negativity to this topic, when that has ended? It's finished, over and done with. I've forgotten about it, so should you and carry on. What I don't understand is, why is this topic even on, when it's about caste? What do the guidelines and rules say about topics on caste? Thank you ji.

Sorry Im not any where close to dehradun. But just wanted to tell you that u could get some resources like leaflets, phamplets from basics of sikhi channel. They also have the waheguru course and also street parchar videos. You could maybe learn feom them. Also i wanted to ask, are there a lot of ramraiye in dehradun?

Its definitely ok just to listen to rehiraas sahib and recite along. If it takes u too long to do japji sahib, listen to it too. The whole morning nitnem audio by jarnail singh takes an hour. Its on youtube too.

Humbled volunteers donate winter kits to Ilfords homeless http://www.ilfordrecorder.co.uk/news/humbled_volunteers_donate_winter_kits_to_ilford_s_homeless_1_4373355?utm_source=Twitter&utm_medium=Social_Icon&utm_campaign=article_teaser_social_icons

This is not the first time you've made a thread about this sort of topic. http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?/topic/77394-do-punjabis-lack-athletic-genes-compared-to-other-races/ http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?/topic/78673-why-lack-of-sikh-in-boxing-mma-an-other-combat-sports/ Do you have amnesia, or just an inferiority complex? If you're worried about your so-called 'racial weakness', get up right now and go to the gym. Sitting on your bum in front of a computer grousing about how physically pathetic you are, probably with a bag of doritos next to you, definitely won't help you overcome your 'racial weakness'. My friend you clearly have some issues with yourself, and trying to find solace in the idea that "other people are just as mediocre as I think I am" is not a good attitude. I'm sorry if I have offended you in any way, but if all the other responses in all the other threads still haven't elicited a change in your thinking, you need a kick up the backside to get you to change.