Anorexia

[Trust1]

sorry for posting this here but i didnt know where else.

ive got a friend who is kind of anorexic

that prob sounds stupid, but i think shes on the way to becoming seriously anorexic. shes not quite there yet.

she keeps throwing her food away when no ones looking, and exercises before she eats so that 'it speeds up her metabolism.'

i cant tell anyone because shes asked me not to, and shes not a very rational person. she'll prob end up killing herself or something.

she looks like a walking skeleton, and her cheeks are all sucked in.

she wont accept that she needs help, and i know she still thinks shes fat.

i dont know what to do. i cant tell anyone, and i cant persuade her to stop. shes not really into sikhi, not that i havent tried explaining stuff to her.

what should i do?

[proud_to_be_singhni]

Sorry bout whats happening to your friend penji....

There may underlying issues why she's chosen this way...Media another influence with those super skinny kinda weird looking models/actresses, attracting boys...maybe someone made a horrible comment to her which made her self esteem go down.

Try and talk to someone elder who may be in better position to explain to your friend that she needs to ask for help and/or eat a balanced and full diet.

Vaheguroooo....hope it goes well penji for your friend...

[WGJKKWGJKF]

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH

Sister im sorry for whats happening to your mate.

And by the way its a good job you posted here, so the sangat can try and help you to help your friend (and by the way the fact that you are concerned and want to help her is very sweet of you- your a good friend).

The fact that shes not into Sikhi, maybe you could persuade her to come to the Gurdwara Sahib with you, so she thinks that she thinks shes supporting you going to the Gurdwara Sahib, when she will be really helping herself find peace and get rid of depression if she has any.

Like the sister above said maybe shes got problems or she might be aiming to be skinny like a model to attract lads. You could try to find out whats going on in her head, like how shes feeling.

And you could remind her you will support her all the way what ever shes going through, and she can trust you, and tell her that you care for her. You could ask her why she throws food away, and what ever she replies the sangat on here can maybe give you solutions on the problems that shes got.

Maybe you could indirectly make her realise she looks good how she is, and she should be happy with what shes got, and that shes got a duty to look after it as Waheguru give us this body, and remind her that this body is temporary so looking good to impress the lads isnt going to help.

I have emailed someone to see what advice she can give on this (she might email me in which i will copy n paste what she writes on here or if she might just write the advice on this forum for you to help your friend).

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH

[WGJKKWGJKF]

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH

I just found this link which talks about the best treatments for anarexia which might help:

http://www.besttreatments.co.uk/btuk/conditions/13354.html

WAHEGURU JI KA KHALSA WAHEGURU JI KI FATEH

[singh_comradz]

sorry for posting this here but i didnt know where else.

ive got a friend who is kind of anorexic

that prob sounds stupid, but i think shes on the way to becoming seriously anorexic. shes not quite there yet.

she keeps throwing her food away when no ones looking, and exercises before she eats so that 'it speeds up her metabolism.'

i cant tell anyone because shes asked me not to, and shes not a very rational person. she'll prob end up killing herself or something.

she looks like a walking skeleton, and her cheeks are all sucked in.

she wont accept that she needs help, and i know she still thinks shes fat.

i dont know what to do. i cant tell anyone, and i cant persuade her to stop. shes not really into sikhi, not that i havent tried explaining stuff to her.

what should i do?

148559[/snapback]

keep trying to persuade her, but then it seems futile as she's not listening..the usual tell tell signs..

i really think you should alert someone from a medical background because she seems as if she's starving herself to death...here is something i came across on a website.

hope it helps

What is anorexia?

Anorexia nervosa, simply known as anorexia is an eating disorder that mainly affects young girls around the age of 16-18, but it can affect anyone.

It is normal for people to be worried about their weight, especially women but people who have anorexia are obsessed with their weight and being thin. They therefore lose a lot of weight so that they are below the normal weight for their age and height.

Even when they have lost weight people with anorexia still see themselves as overweight and so refuse to eat or eat very little, they may also exercise all the the time to try and burn off more calories. As time goes on people with anorexia may develop symptoms of bulimia such as, using laxatives or making themselves sick to lose weight. However, unlike people with 'pure' bulimia, their weight will remain low.

The eating disorders association estimates that about 165,000 people in the UK have eating disorders with 10% dying as a result, but experts also fear this figure could be higher.

What causes anorexia?

People can develop anorexia for all sorts of reasons, though there usually is an underlying emotional or psychological disorder which is the cause. Puberty, deaths in the family, parents divorce, a relationship break-up, bullying and other stresses are all potential triggers of anorexia. People with anorexia tend to believe that their life will be improved if they were thin.

The increase in the number of people with eating disorders has also been blamed on super-thin models. The media constantly advertise being slim as beautiful and fat as unattractive and with the many miracle diets now promoted people are constantly trying to reach their ideal weight.

Anorexia can begin with a normal diet which is then carried to extremes, with sufferers eating as little as possible and finding their whole life revolves around food. You might also be more at risk of developing anorexia if a family member has previously been affected by an eating disorder.

What symptoms are linked with anorexia?

Warning signs that someone might be suffering with anorexia could include any of the following:

Weight loss, that may be hidden by the sufferer wearing baggy clothes.

Fear of putting on weight.

Obsession about food or calories and with body shape or size.

Refusal to eat.

Denial of hunger.

Excessive exercising.

Fainting spells.

Constipation.

Greater amounts of hair on the body or the face due to a lack of protein in the diet.

Always feeling the cold.

Lack of concentration, moodiness and difficulty sleeping.

Dry skin.

Absent or irregular periods.

Loss of scalp hair.

What is the difference between anorexia and bulimia?

The main difference between the two is people with bulimia usually manage to keep their weight within a healthy limit. This is because they binge eat (eat a lot of food at once) and this will often include eating fattening foods, for example they may eat a few cakes at one time. They then feel guilty and so make themselves sick or will take laxatives. However, people with anorexia starve themselves and avoid high-calorie food so tend to lose a lot of weight.

How is anorexia diagnosed?

There are no specific tests available to diagnose anorexia, though your doctor may want to do a blood test to check for anaemia or other possible causes of weight loss. You should also be prepared for the possibility that your doctor may ask some strange questions.

It is usually friends or family members who will suddenly realise that something is wrong when they notice that not only has the sufferer lost weight but is continuing to do so. The sufferer will often deny they have a problem and will still believe they are overweight. If you are worried that someone you know is suffering with anorexia, make sure they get help but be gentle with the suggestion.

How is anorexia treated?

Treating anorexia can be difficult as the person suffering usually doesn't believe they need help or treatment. Over 25% of people with anorexia become so weak that they require hospitalisation and they may need to be force fed. The main aim of treatment is to restore the person to a healthy weight, this is achieved by finding the underlying cause of anorexia and by helping the sufferer to get back to normal eating patterns. However, for treatment to be successful the person with anorexia must want to change and accept the help and support of family, friends and doctors.

People with anorexia will usually need counselling for a year or more to treat any mental health problems.

Medication, such as antidepressants may be necessary where depression is severe.

What happens if anorexia is untreated?

If the person suffering with anorexia doesn't get help they might be at risk at death from starvation. Over time, a lack of food can also cause the following:

An irregular heartbeat.

Muscles to waste away.

Kidney failure.

Osteoporosis, due to a lack of calcium.

As people who suffer from anorexia are usually depressed they are also at an increased risk of committing suicide.

[japmans]

hanji...... frankly, if she passes away from her eating disorder, will you be happy with yourself for having keot the secret?? will "being a good friend" be okay?

personally.. i've been in your situation... thought it wasn't as bad.... the girl had alot of respect for me so she listened to me about eating.... she wasn't a sikh, but i don't think tha thas anything to do with it.

i think you'd be a better friend if you save her life.... honestly, if she dies from an eating disorder.... would you regret not having told someone, or would you be satisfied with your acitons because you kept her secret?

i'm not trying to sound harsh, but if no one helps this girl, that is the situation you will end up facing.

[Trust1]

thanks for the replies.

shes just getting worse, but theres not really much i can do.

would you regret not having told someone, or would you be satisfied with your acitons because you kept her secret?

your right. im just gonna have to tell someone.

thanks to everyone who replied, it means alot.

[singhni84]

double post

[singhni84]

There are lots of agencies that can help you talk to your friend and can tell you how you can best help, what to say etc. A lot of the time, those who try to help don't end up helping at all. Eating disorders aren't just a simple case of feeling fat and teh cure isn't to simply tell the person that she looks fine. It's a lot deeper. Whereabouts are you? You can probably do a quick google of agencies that deal with this sort of thing near you and they could provide you with useful resources.