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Classic definitions


Guest balwinderkaur
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Guest balwinderkaur

i got this in an email...quite funny ;)

Classic definitions :

* Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at

one end & a fool at the other

* Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor

degree and a woman gains her master

* Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the

lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of

either"

* Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number

present

* Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that

everybody believes he got the biggest piece

* Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is

defeated by feminine water power

* Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nothing listens &

everybody disagrees later on.

* Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read

* Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight

* Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life

* Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

* Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you

actually do.

* Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to

decide that nothing can be done together.

* Experience : The name men give to their mistakes

* Atom Bomb : An invention to end all inventi

ons

* Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken

of when dead

* Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way

that you actually look forward to the trip.

* Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally

falls into a river.

* Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says

in midway "See I am not injured yet"

* Pessimist : A person who says that 0 is the last letter in Zero,

instead of OPPORTUNITY

* Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich

* Father : A banker provided by nature

* Criminal : A guy no different from the rest.... Except that he

got caught

* Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are

early

* Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your

confidence after

* Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with

his bills

* Dentist : A magician who puts metals in your mouth and pulls out

money from your pocket.

Regards,

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[quote

* Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you

actually do.

thats soo me...hahahaha

Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the

lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of

either"

* Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is

defeated by feminine water power

ohmy.gif oyi...u shoud've deleted this one out :T:

* Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nothing listens &

everybody disagrees later on. ;) (happens on this form often doesn't it) blush.gif

* Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight :nihungsmile:

* Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich

thes are soo cuteee

B)

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