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Sikhs Marrying Their Own Cousins


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On the Nihal's morning discussion show (on the BBC Asian Network) they were discussing (after 10am) for an hour about religious tensions amongst the south Asian communities. A Muslim woman on the show stated that she had made a documentary on forced marriages were Sikhs were forced into marrying their own cousins. I was really shocked by this. Is this true? Does this really happen? How can such a marriage occur in a Gurdwara were a Sikh couple are each others cousins?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio/aod/asiannetwor.../asiannihal_tue

Listen about 1:45 minutes into show.

I too used to take great delight in reminding my muslim friends that we sikhs are so against cousin marriage that we go to great lengths when choosing a marriage partner, to ensure that our paternal and maternal 'goths' do not match so as to eliminate even the slightest chance of a distant blood relation.

I thought this was a sikh thing. Little did I know it was a 'jatt' thing.

Then.....with the deteriorating situation in Afghanistan, up to 10,000 Afghan sikhs moved into our west London neighbourhood. I found that they, being exclusively arora and khatri, married their first cousins the same way that muslims do.

Later, found out that it wasn't just an 'Afghan' thing to do that. Found out that all bhappe....whether in Delhi, Bombay, Calcutta or Jalandhar do the same thing....i.e marry their first cousins.

I then realised why most non sikhs in India think all sikhs marry their cousins. The average sikh in the city in town is of a bhappa background...and so the average non-sikh associates all bhappe activities with normal everyday sikh activities. They have no interaction with the rural jatts.

That, is also why the Indian drama serials think it is quite normal for a sikh to do pooja at home and to inter-marry with hindus etc.

Personally though.....I prefer my jatt ways. The jatt way is the sikh way.

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I thought this was a sikh thing. Little did I know it was a 'jatt' thing.

Then.....with the deteriorating situation in Afghanistan, up to 10,000 Afghan sikhs moved into our west London neighbourhood. I found that they, being exclusively arora and khatri, married their first cousins the same way that muslims do.

That's not true - Non- muslim Punjabis of all backgrounds observe these rules. Muslim Jatts do not. Also your statements about Afghani Sikhs is false.

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I thought this was a sikh thing. Little did I know it was a 'jatt' thing.

Then.....with the deteriorating situation in Afghanistan, up to 10,000 Afghan sikhs moved into our west London neighbourhood. I found that they, being exclusively arora and khatri, married their first cousins the same way that muslims do.

That's not true - Non- muslim Punjabis of all backgrounds observe these rules. Muslim Jatts do not. Also your statements about Afghani Sikhs is false.

Fella, a quarter of my road are 'Afghan' sikhs. We don't live in isolation from one another. We do talk to each other and attend each others functions....and, we do have eyes.

So, either you're one of these 10,000 west London Afghan sikhs yourself, in which case this would be a good opportunity to admit and dondemn what 'some' afghan sikhs do or.....you just like saying "thats not true", because its easier than admitting something thats actualy quite shamefull to our sikh community.

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Fella, a quarter of my road are 'Afghan' sikhs. We don't live in isolation from one another. We do talk to each other and attend each others functions....and, we do have eyes.

Used to work with the Refugee Council so know many Afghani Sikh families personally. From what I know, they go through the same checks before choosing marriage partners as other Sikhs.

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Fella, a quarter of my road are 'Afghan' sikhs. We don't live in isolation from one another. We do talk to each other and attend each others functions....and, we do have eyes.

Used to work with the Refugee Council so know many Afghani Sikh families personally. From what I know, they go through the same checks before choosing marriage partners as other Sikhs.

^ Admirable and much needed work.....especially with our immoral govt thinking it right and safe to send sikhs back to Afghanistan. Top man.

But.......Generally, rightly or wrongly, I think you'll find the main issue of contention between the jatt / ramgharias and the newer arrival aroras and khatris in west London is the way that the jatts / ramgharias regard the arora / khatri marriage practices as insest.

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Is this true about Afghan Sikhs??

Or just caste based mud slinging?

There are very few Afghan Sikhs in East London (some but not that much compared to the west.

I think if it is true then it may be a case of Afghan Sikhs adopted the normalised practices of the Muslim majority over the centuries. But did someone say this was common in Indian based Arora/Khatri etc. Sikhs?

This is strange. But it must be a new thing. I read Prem Sumarag and it laid out the rules and was specifically against this type of stuff.

Please don't turn this into "bruaah main jaat aaan!!" nonsense by the way. Singh and ting.

Waheguru!

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Is this true about Afghan Sikhs??

Or just caste based mud slinging?

There are very few Afghan Sikhs in East London (some but not that much compared to the west.

I think if it is true then it may be a case of Afghan Sikhs adopted the normalised practices of the Muslim majority over the centuries. But did someone say this was common in Indian based Arora/Khatri etc. Sikhs?

This is strange. But it must be a new thing. I read Prem Sumarag and it laid out the rules and was specifically against this type of stuff.

Please don't turn this into "bruaah main jaat aaan!!" nonsense by the way. Singh and ting.

Waheguru!

Not just an Afghan thing bruvs. Its the norm among the aroras and khatris. It is in fact the main issue of contention here in west London between the traditional jatts / ramgharias and the newly arrived aroras / khatris. The jatts / ramgharias do see the arora / khatri marriage practices as insest and this creates alot of bad feeling within the sikh community. I was gonna say bad blood but that would be a bad joke.

Read this : http://www.sikhnet.com/discussion/viewtopi...?f=10&t=968

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Is this true about Afghan Sikhs??

Or just caste based mud slinging?

There are very few Afghan Sikhs in East London (some but not that much compared to the west.

I think if it is true then it may be a case of Afghan Sikhs adopted the normalised practices of the Muslim majority over the centuries. But did someone say this was common in Indian based Arora/Khatri etc. Sikhs?

This is strange. But it must be a new thing. I read Prem Sumarag and it laid out the rules and was specifically against this type of stuff.

Please don't turn this into "bruaah main jaat aaan!!" nonsense by the way. Singh and ting.

Waheguru!

Not just an Afghan thing bruvs. Its the norm among the aroras and khatris. It is in fact the main issue of contention here in west London between the traditional jatts / ramgharias and the newly arrived aroras / khatris. The jatts / ramgharias do see the arora / khatri marriage practices as insest and this creates alot of bad feeling within the sikh community. I was gonna say bad blood but that would be a bad joke.

Read this : http://www.sikhnet.com/discussion/viewtopi...?f=10&t=968

If this is the case I think the following:

Firstly I imagine the practice will end in a few generations as the people brought up here will see it for what it is.

Secondly other Sikhs should tactfully and respectfully educate these brothers/sisters over time.

Thirdly and controversially (for conservatives) we should encourage "inter-caste" marriages so the Sikh gene pool doesn't become stagnant. This is already happening quite a lot these days, so the trend is good.

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Ohh like this!! Now I get it... Yes many Singhs do.. I didn't think like that... Now that you guys are talking about other than Indian Sikhs, I have remembered that Pakistani Sikhs do it very much. I had read a report where the inbreeding of NWFP (a state in Pakistan) Sikhs and Muslims was written. Sikhs were much more inbred than those Muslims, in many cases!! In Afghanistan, this happens too. This mainly happens in Pakistan and Afghanistan, mainly due to some reasons like people of India or foreign countries that are unwilling to marry their children in Pakistan, thus, due to their minimal population, they are forced to marry in the family. Some Muslim influence can be possible too.

I will look for a few links on this issue..

Bhul Chuk Maaf,

WJKK WJKF

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