Our Wedding

[manmoorakh]

Sat Kartar

We are planning to get married next year around Aug - Sep in the London area.

Both on our paths in Sikhi.

We have both devoted our lives to Kirtan and would really like for our chosen Kirtanis to do the Kirtan and Anand Kaaraj.

We are not having any reception as such but would like to have a nice lunch/dinner for the guests. No meat, no alcohol, no party

Ideally we want a nice place for the dinner after the Anand Kaaraj where the families could enjoy a nice meal and get to know each other. It would be even better if the Gurdwara had a multi purpose hall where we could have the dinner but most Gurdwaras that do have halls, have been linked with some form of Beadbi by allowing alcohol or other non Gurmat things on their premises.

The problem is that most Gurdwaras do not let us have our own Kirtanis. If they do it is only for Kirtan after their own Kirtanis do the Anand Kaaraj. But we both insist on own our Kirtanis throughout. We tried many Guru Ghars in our area and even further away but have had problems either with the Kirtanis or no place for Dinner.

It has now been suggested to us to hold everything in a School. We tried local Sikh schools but they all had problems, insisting on their own Kirtanis. So then a Gursikh suggested a local school that has just been built. Its a new school so its a nice place and they havn't hired out for any social events.

The question is:

What is the Sangat's views on a Gursikh Anand Kaaraj being held in a School?

It isn't a Hotel or Bar or Club where they serve alcohol. This hall is only used for examinations and we could also use the main dining hall for the dinner.

It seems the only way we can get the Kirtan our way and keep Satkar as well as have a Dinner which is not classed as a hall party but an elegent family dinner.

We are a couple who also strongly disagree with the Beadbi of Guru Maharaj in the past in places where alcohol is even in the same hall of the Anand Kaaraj. This is why we are requesting the sangat's opinion.

Sat Kartar

[Matheen]

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa! Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

Try Sikh Missionary in Southall - I think they'll let you bring your own Kirtanees. Have Langar afterwards, not a lunch/dinner. :sleep:

[manmoorakh]

Thank you.

We have just recently spoke to them and it is an option but we do not want to use the banqueeting hall opposite for tea or Roti.

Thank you

[Only five]

Ideally we want a nice place for the dinner after the Anand Kaaraj where the families could enjoy a nice meal and get to know each other.

Elegant dinner, I guess Guru ka Langar isn't good enough anymore. If this was Guru Nanak Dev ji's time he wouldn't even let you have his darshan before eating Guru Ka Langar.

[manmoorakh]

Gee thanks for the support.

We are the only ones in Both our families that are into Sikhi. We have only just about convinced everyone so we can have a Gursikh Wedding without meat or alcohol but this was our comprimise.

Guru ka Langar wasn't there in its present form at Guru Nanak Dev jis time. But thanks for being the Guru's spokesperson and taking on the duty of refusing Guru jis Darshan.

[Only five]

Gee thanks for the support.

We are the only ones in Both our families that are into Sikhi. We have only just about convinced everyone so we can have a Gursikh Wedding without meat or alcohol but this was our comprimise.

Guru ka Langar wasn't there in its present form at Guru Nanak Dev jis time. But thanks for being the Guru's spokesperson and taking on the duty of refusing Guru jis Darshan.

I tell you something Guru Nanak Dev ji wants from his Sikhs and you take it as an insult. Do you also walk backwards.

Guru Nanak Dev ji started langar and it is surely no different today. Today Sikhs first go pay their respect to Guru Sahib and when Guru Nanak Dev ji started it, he made everyone take langar first then he would allow Sikhs or others come pay their respect.

And today I say Sri Akal Takht should issue the same Hukam because Sikhs are forgetten what langar is.

Thanks for the perfect example of what not to do.

[Bundha]

For God's sake 'Only Five' do we have to reduce every single bloomin' thread into a criticizm ? Do we have to always just get into an argument??? What is wrong with people these days ???

Manmoorakh is asking a simple question, he is not having any meat/ alcohol etc etc at the wedding, instead of congratulating him on this great step in this dark age that we live in where every wedding degenerates into booze and bhangra, shouldn't this couple be praised ??? no, instead we pick up one little thing and start critisizing again and again and again, for god sake give it a bloomin rest! He want to have a meal afterwards that is all.

Manmoorakh, you are doing a great thing, good luck in your search for a gurughar where you can have a wedding like you want it and dont be put off by people who just want to critisize all the time.

[Hoshiarpuria]

For God's sake 'Only Five' do we have to reduce every single bloomin' thread into a criticizm ? Do we have to always just get into an argument??? What is wrong with people these days ???

Manmoorakh is asking a simple question, he is not having any meat/ alcohol etc etc at the wedding, instead of congratulating him on this great step in this dark age that we live in where every wedding degenerates into booze and bhangra, shouldn't this couple be praised ??? no, instead we pick up one little thing and start critisizing again and again and again, for god sake give it a bloomin rest! He want to have a meal afterwards that is all.

Manmoorakh, you are doing a great thing, good luck in your search for a gurughar where you can have a wedding like you want it and dont be put off by people who just want to critisize all the time.

WELL SAID BUNDHA !!!! Its sad when we turn on people or orgs who are genuinly trying to be positive !!! so idiotic !! Congrats to the happy couple, best wishes !!

[mala]

Try Guru Gobind Singh Khalsa College in Chigwell, Essex. I think the langar hall is quite large and they won't have an issue with kirtanis. The Ramgharia Gurdwara in Forest Gate also does not have a major issue with non-residential Kirtanis (the caste committee culture may be an issue to some)

Also the Gurdwara in Alice Way, Hounslow has a large langar hall as well as the Brent Sikh Centre in Kingsbury but you may have the kirtani issue.

Guru Nanak School in Hayes has a big langar hall and they may accomodate other the kirtanis.

[manmoorakh]

thank you Mala.

tried all the above. Alice way and GN Sikh college have issues with Kirtanis. Amarjit Singh said it very bluntly that no1 else could do the ceremony apart from him.

What do the Sanagt think about the whole event being held in a School?