Sardar Hari Singh Nalwa & Bibi Bano

[puzzled]

I heard this sakhi at the gurdwara a few weeks back. Hari Singh Nalwa was a true Sikh, he remained true to Sikh values and morals. He was a real man with values, morals, dignity and self respect.  Very inspiring figure in our history. 

 

"During the times of Sher-e-Panjab, Raja Ranjit Singh, the Sikh Raaj (kingdom) stretched from Delhi to Kabul (in Afghanistan). Raja Ranjit Singh's key general was Sardar Hari Singh Nalwa, who was a Rehatvan (strict observant) Sikh of the Guru. Once Hari Singh Nalwa had set up camp with his army in Jamraud in Afghanistan. A local Muslim woman called 'Bano' watched the Sikhs set up camp. She found Hari Singh Nalwa very handsome and attractive, and wished to have an illicit relationship with him.

One day Bano came to see Hari Singh Nalwa. He was sitting in his tent, when the Sikh guards told him that he had a local woman who wished to see him. Not knowing who this lady was or what she wanted, Hari Singh gave permission to come and see him. Bano said, "I had heard of the Sikhs. You are remarkable people. I have been watching you from a distance. I am not married and have no children, but desire to have a son who is like you."

Hari Singh did not understand the motivation or intention of Bano and said, "May Waheguru bless you that you may have a son with the qualities of a Sikh." Bano irritably said, "I want to have a son with you Sardar Ji."

Hari Singh Nalwa said, "O sister! I am already married. I am sorry I cannot marry you or give you what you want."

Bano's eyes welled up with tears of disappointment. About to leave, she said, "I had heard your Guru Nanak was great and that no one leaves empty handed from Guru Nanak's House, but today I am being turned away without the wish of a son being fulfilled."

Hari Singh Nalwa, a true example of a Sikh of the Guru, replied, "It is true that no one goes empty handed from Guru Nanak's House. I cannot give you a son, but if you desire a son to be like me, then instead if you accept, from now on I will be your son, and I will consider you my mother." Bano was shocked and overwhelmed by Hari Singh Nalwa's sincerity, high moral character and faith in the Guru. She said, "I had heard that Sikhs of the Guru are great honorable people, but today I have seen it with my own eyes. From that day on Hari Singh Nalwa addressed Begum Bano as "Maa" (Mother) and she addressed Hari Singh as "Putar" (Son) "

[puzzled]

Mughals/invaders often used to send attractive mughal women as spies or distractions into their enemies camps. I'd imagine many soldiers fell for these traps. 

[jkvlondon]

52 minutes ago, puzzled said:

Mughals/invaders often used to send attractive mughal women as spies or distractions into their enemies camps. I'd imagine many soldiers fell for these traps. 

no they didn't because they valued their Guru PIta ji's instruction against marrying such bibian

[dallysingh101]

3 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

no they didn't because they valued their Guru PIta ji's instruction against marrying such bibian

They were scared of becoming sullay by the pollution. Early accounts strongly suggest that having sexual relationships with a sulli automatically made a Singh a sullah according to Sikh code of conduct. 

[dallysingh101]

1 hour ago, puzzled said:

I heard this sakhi at the gurdwara a few weeks back. Hari Singh Nalwa was a true Sikh, he remained true to Sikh values and morals. He was a real man with values, morals, dignity and self respect.  Very inspiring figure in our history. 

 

"During the times of Sher-e-Panjab, Raja Ranjit Singh, the Sikh Raaj (kingdom) stretched from Delhi to Kabul (in Afghanistan). Raja Ranjit Singh's key general was Sardar Hari Singh Nalwa, who was a Rehatvan (strict observant) Sikh of the Guru. Once Hari Singh Nalwa had set up camp with his army in Jamraud in Afghanistan. A local Muslim woman called 'Bano' watched the Sikhs set up camp. She found Hari Singh Nalwa very handsome and attractive, and wished to have an illicit relationship with him.

One day Bano came to see Hari Singh Nalwa. He was sitting in his tent, when the Sikh guards told him that he had a local woman who wished to see him. Not knowing who this lady was or what she wanted, Hari Singh gave permission to come and see him. Bano said, "I had heard of the Sikhs. You are remarkable people. I have been watching you from a distance. I am not married and have no children, but desire to have a son who is like you."

Hari Singh did not understand the motivation or intention of Bano and said, "May Waheguru bless you that you may have a son with the qualities of a Sikh." Bano irritably said, "I want to have a son with you Sardar Ji."

Hari Singh Nalwa said, "O sister! I am already married. I am sorry I cannot marry you or give you what you want."

Bano's eyes welled up with tears of disappointment. About to leave, she said, "I had heard your Guru Nanak was great and that no one leaves empty handed from Guru Nanak's House, but today I am being turned away without the wish of a son being fulfilled."

Hari Singh Nalwa, a true example of a Sikh of the Guru, replied, "It is true that no one goes empty handed from Guru Nanak's House. I cannot give you a son, but if you desire a son to be like me, then instead if you accept, from now on I will be your son, and I will consider you my mother." Bano was shocked and overwhelmed by Hari Singh Nalwa's sincerity, high moral character and faith in the Guru. She said, "I had heard that Sikhs of the Guru are great honorable people, but today I have seen it with my own eyes. From that day on Hari Singh Nalwa addressed Begum Bano as "Maa" (Mother) and she addressed Hari Singh as "Putar" (Son) "

I'm careful of such narratives myself. Until I find an early/earlyish source.  

[jkvlondon]

Just now, dallysingh101 said:

They were scared of becoming sullay by the pollution. Early accounts strongly suggest that having sexual relationships with a sulli automatically made a Singh a sullah according to Sikh code of conduct. 

That is direct from sakhi where Singh was injured and captured on the battlefield, they cut his hair, did sunnat and so he was scared he would not be parwan to Guru ji , but Guru ji told him until you marry/have knowledge of a non sikh you will remain a sikh

[dallysingh101]

1 minute ago, jkvlondon said:

That is direct from sakhi where Singh was injured and captured on the battlefield, they cut his hair, did sunnat and so he was scared he would not be parwan to Guru ji , but Guru ji told him until you marry/have knowledge of a non sikh you will remain a sikh

That narrative occurs a number of times in earlier sources. 

That kureit of having bhog with sullis was changed to all extra-marital relationships during the Singh Sabha reformations. 

[jkvlondon]

1 minute ago, dallysingh101 said:

That narrative occurs a number of times in earlier sources. 

That kureit of having bhog with sullis was changed to all extra-marital relationships during the Singh Sabha reformations. 

hardly , other sakhi of Guru ji behaving as Chonkidar to prevent his Gursikh from sin of extra marital sex shows it was always a sin no matter what the marital status or faith

[dallysingh101]

6 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

hardly , other sakhi of Guru ji behaving as Chonkidar to prevent his Gursikh from sin of extra marital sex shows it was always a sin no matter what the marital status or faith

Yeah, but 'bhoging' a sulli was a major one for Singhs - it turned them into sullay. 

[jkvlondon]

1 minute ago, dallysingh101 said:

Yeah, but 'bhoging' a sulli was a major one for Singhs - it turned them into sullay. 

judging by the results of singhs marrying hindu girls they become hindu in outlook too and allow their wives to make the kids into hindus despite asian traditions stating it is normal for kids to be same as dad...