Humilation Or Not.

[Guest someone]

This happened to me on Saturday. I normally do sangat and do my share of sewa. I went to an asa kee war keertan. I thought the people that usually do asa kee war would show up late as usuall. I started in the intention that the Granthi at that Gurdwara wants the Asa Kee War finished by 8:00am. I thought if I start at least it will help the kirtanias save time rather than go overtime. So I started it was 6:30am no one showed up. I kept going for the respect of Guru Jee. It was 7:00am no body showed up. I asked Granthi Singh is anybody coming he said no. I asked him do we have any tabla player from the ragi jatha he said they are sleeping. I though I did a good deed after 2 hours I completed the asa kee war all by myself. All day I felt postive. Next day a question came to my mind am I being humiliated. I started to think about how my X and the children never listened to me to follow my path. I was once asked that I should bring my who is now my x and the children and start asa kee war. They never listened to me. That reminder made me cry. I asked myself is this the punishment I get for going to asa kee war since a very young age. There is always two sides to a story but no one listens to someone like me. Everyone around me thinks I am stupid. I admit I am stupid I am a sinner. It seems that Guru Jee will never listen to me and make my life way I wanted. to. I have been punished and humilated before the sangat. I once had my hands tied and taken in the sangat. Depression can lead to you anything. A person in depression knows everything. A person in depression knows the guilt nows the punishment but a person with depression can not control. So I was punished by the 5 piaras. Oh well until the time is right suffering is my speciality.

[Guest Guest]

Humiliation, are you kidding.

Just read the following verse from Japji Sahib.

ਜਿਸ ਨੋ ਬਖਸੇ ਸਿਫਤਿ ਸਾਲਾਹ ॥

One who is blessed to sing the Praises of the Lord,

ਹੇ ਨਾਨਕ! ਜਿਸ ਮਨੁੱਖ ਨੂੰ ਅਕਾਲ ਪੁਰਖ ਆਪਣੀ ਸਿਫ਼ਤ-ਸਾਲਾਹ ਬਖਸ਼ਦਾ ਹੈ,

ਨਾਨਕ ਪਾਤਿਸਾਹੀ ਪਾਤਿਸਾਹੁ ॥੨੫॥

O Nanak, is the king of kings. ||25||

ਉਹ ਪਾਤਸ਼ਾਹਾਂ ਦਾ ਪਾਤਸ਼ਾਹ (ਬਣ ਜਾਂਦਾ) ਹੈ (ਸਿਫ਼ਤ-ਸਾਲਾਹ ਹੀ ਸਭ ਤੋਂ ਉੱਚੀ ਦਾਤ ਹੈ) ॥੨੫॥

On the contrary, what you did is commendable.

As for your past problems will quote Alexander Graham Bell

"When one door closes another door opens; but we so often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door, that we do not see the ones which open for us."

Being able to do Kirtan is a gift, try to explore this talent.

Waheguru aape kirpa karenge te dukh nivaran ge

[VanHelsingh]

Best not to dwell on the negative. You're doing Gurbani which is a lot more than some people are doing currently. I consider that to be a huge positive.

[DaljitKaur24]

I agree with the above member there's no point of dwelling over what already happened. Rather focus on the present and the future. Sometimes we have to go through bad deeds and time for good ones to develop. A lot of people have had bad incidents in their life but the point is to rise above it. Which you are obviously doing. I think it's very courageous of you to do paath by yourself at the gurdwara just keep doing that and don't think what others think of you. Because then there would be no point of doing paath if you are caught up in what others think. Just keep your head up and keep doing paath and seva and Guru ji will definetly give you peace of mind.

[simran345]

Paji please dont get depressed. I dont think its punishment. Sometimes in life there comes a time when we feel alone, but we are not.

So Wat nobody is there not there to listen to you doting paat? Maharaj ji is there is listening to you, your every word, your every breath, they listen to you everyday. What more can one ask for? When you do Asa di Vaar, there is always somebody there. How did you miss them? We look towards others for honsla, support. But in actual fact it is Waheguru that creates the support.

That would be so lovely, just you and Maharaj ji listening to you, the tranquility should make you concentrate more. And carry on doing with love for them, Sangat Will form by themselves.

nobody came with us and nobody is going with us, only Waheguru helps.

If you feel very depressed please talk to somebody or get professional help if you cannot cope.

Keep your mind positive, i think you are doing great.

Waheguru, tu hi tu hi. . .

[panther]

This happened to me on Saturday. I normally do sangat and do my share of sewa. I went to an asa kee war keertan. I thought the people that usually do asa kee war would show up late as usuall. I started in the intention that the Granthi at that Gurdwara wants the Asa Kee War finished by 8:00am. I thought if I start at least it will help the kirtanias save time rather than go overtime. So I started it was 6:30am no one showed up. I kept going for the respect of Guru Jee. It was 7:00am no body showed up. I asked Granthi Singh is anybody coming he said no. I asked him do we have any tabla player from the ragi jatha he said they are sleeping. I though I did a good deed after 2 hours I completed the asa kee war all by myself. All day I felt postive.

just stick to the first part + tell ur mind to ignore the other part which u felt bad about as it was a false mindset illusion to your mind

[ghatak]

Well devtas and shaheed singhs are always present in guru granth sahib ji hazoori. so yes they are listening to you and as well as guru sahib ji