do sikhs only protest mixed marriages in gurdwara when its sikh girl

[cgy99100]

seems like in each case were sikhs have protested its a sikh girl marrying a non sikh but never heard

of a protest were its a sikh guy and a non sikh girl which may lead some that some sikhs

are protesting out of insecurity and use the fact sikhs must marry sikhs if they want to have a wedding

in the gurdwara many people are asking if its driven by insecure men

rather then protest why not channel that anger at looking at different ways on educating sikh youth

on their religion and history and how anyone can apply some of the lessons from sikhism in their life

to empower

and for someone to be allowed to get married in the gurdwara do they have to be born to two sikh parants and they themselves be agnostics or athiests

if you have one person born into a sikh family and knows nothing about sikhism and is agnostic is

that person allowed getting married in the gurdwara or are they allowed and if another person is

born into a christian family and know alot about sikhism and sikh history but choose to be agnostic is he banned from getting married in the gurdwara

[cgy99100]

is the rule going to be people have to be baptised sikhs to get married in the gurdwara

[pashanks]

I'm a 24 yr old girl, a Hindu, though not devout. I'd like to call myself more of an atheist.I'm an a 3 year relationship with a Sikh guy. He's wonderful and he is the one for me. But currently we're facing troubles with his family as they disapprove of our relationship. My family has strongly supported us and still is giving their full support. I have considered converting to Sikhism, not for the guy entirely, but also because the religion itself is very divine and focused. I try to read the simplified version of the prayer books, and I have constantly educated myself about their culture. I have let my family know of this, and they are fully supportive. I have even told my bf, in order for his family to also know about this, but I'm not to sure if they do not want to even hear the son talking about me/don't think it'll matter if I do convert. But for this man, I would do anything. We are both final year medical students, and we are from really good families. I do not entirely understand the basis of their rejection apart from the difference of culture and religion, which both I am willing to learn and adapt with an open heart and mind. I am old enough to understand my decisions. I have seen plenty of interracial marriages here between a sikh and a hindu. But it is unfortunate that my bf's family is not eager of welcoming me to their family. I have no bad habits, I do not smoke/drink, i come from a very decent, well to do, educated family. I wish someone can give me a perspective of my bf's family. According to them, the Sikh community will not accept them and they will be embarrased to face the community, thus they are asking their son to sacrifice his happiness and his choice. But the truth is, the country I'm in, a marriage between a sikh and a hindu is well accepted in communities. Why are they feeding him such ideas? They also have told him that it is sinful and he will bring the whole family to shame. Why are they putting him down like that? Has he made a sinful choice in choosing someone who loves him and is willing to learn/adapt the culture?

My post - http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?/topic/70824-sikhhindu-relationship-marriage/

[cgy99100]

how do sikhs define who is a sikh and who isn't when ppl get married in the gurdwara

if someone is born to a sikh family but is an athiest and got married in the gurdwara would that be ok

and then can't someone else pretend to be a sikh for the day and get married in the gurdwara or just lie saying

they converted to sikhism just to get married and then never say their sikh again

[Mehtab Singh]

"cgy99100"

Its all very nice and dandy to say what if this, what if that. Truth of the matter is we live in a real world, not a cyber one. Back in the days only Amritdharis could get married in the holy presence of Guru Sahib's paavan pavitter saroop. Today its common for non-Sikhs to do it. Its actually funny when people go before Guru Sahib and get married but don't even lead a life that is committed to His teachings or Hukams.

Anyways, I am no one to judge, can't be bothered to give a damn about what folks do in their lives. Its a really funny world out there. On one hand you have those who are dead strict on protocols and end up resorting to violence, and on the other you have cartoons who want everything "easily accessible" in Sikhi. I laugh at both. In a way you're kind of right, why no uproar when the girl is non-Sikh. One word: hypocrisy, another phrase: double-standards, as simple as that.

Sorry if this wasn't what you were looking for.

[DSGj]

^Nice post!

Sikhism today isn't the same as it was even 50 years ago.

Don't get me wrong, the real version of Sikhism is still alive and well..but it only exists in a certain few who are a minority as far as numbers are concerned.

People who are "Punjabi", think they are automatically Sikhs from birth.

One isn't anything at birth. It's the life you lead after birth that shows what you are and aren't.

People often state that Rehit and Maryada aren't important because it's not in Guru Granth Sahib Jee.

Well, people saying that should look at Guru Gobind Singh Jee's Hukams and Rehits.....the person who gave Guruship to Guru Granth Sahib Jee.

If you're going to follow Guru Granth Sahib Jee....you also have to follow Guru Gobind Singh Jee's life and Bachans equally.

The "Punjabi community" which self-declares itself as Sikhs..well let's just say it's all hypocritical.

Read my posts in this following topic for more information:

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?/topic/70777-sikh-wedding-crashers-advertised-on-radio-11032013/

[13Mirch]

Mehtab Ji and Dasam Ji. U have hit the nail right on the head. Other than that all these individuals can do whatever they want to.

[doctor_mani]

A Sikh marrying a non-sikh is not justified regardless of gender. I can however unequivocally say that there are far more Sikh girls marrying non-sikh boys than there are Sikh-boys marrying non-sikh girls. Wrong as it may sound, perhaps this is why there is a greater stir when a Sikh girl is marrying a non-sikh boy.

I feel let down by the Gurdwara commitees who not only disregard Sri Akhal Takhts hukam, but Guru Gobind Singh Ji's hukams.

[13Mirch]

A Sikh marrying a non-sikh is not justified regardless of gender. I can however unequivocally say that there are far more Sikh girls marrying non-sikh boys than there are Sikh-boys marrying non-sikh girls. Wrong as it may sound, perhaps this is why there is a greater stir when a Sikh girl is marrying a non-sikh boy.

I feel let down by the Gurdwara commitees who not only disregard Sri Akhal Takhts hukam, but Guru Gobind Singh Ji's hukams.

Everyone is setting up their own rehat. What does the Prem Sumarag Granth say about Khalsa marriage?

[Mann-Sahib]

Pashanks

Really sorry to hear about your experience. That family is not how all Sikhs are. Become a Sikh if you really want to and not to please anyone.

I bet your alot better and more of a Sikh than alot of out so called Sikh girls these days. Your man should stand by you! Good luck