Dating A White Girl

[Guest raj]

Hello everyone,

so let me explain what is going on. I am a keshdari Sikh guy in University. I work out, have friends from every race/religion, I consider myself to be a social and fit guy who also holds Guru Jis teachings very strongly in his heart and I absolutely love Sikhi. Now, I've always had a bunch of female friends, talking to girls has never been a problem for me. Throughout High School, and at the beginning of Uni, I always wanted to start a relationship with a Punjabi girl. Most were friendly with me, but wouldn't go out with me. The few that did always ended it after a few dates, because they wanted short haired guys.

Of course it was disappointing, but I never once considered cutting my hair. If a girl didn't respect my hair, she wasn't worth my time, that was my train of thought. Looking back at it now, I can't believe I asked most of them out either, they may have been Punjabi, but they didn't have an ounce of Sikhi or Sikhi knowledge in their bodies, I wouldn't look twice at girls like that today.

So despite my experiences, I still maintained hope that I would end up with a Punjabi SIKH girl one day, I didn't pay much attention to girls who were not Punjabi/from Sikh backgrounds (although now that I reflect, most of the non-Punjabi girls I knew were a lot nicer, and I could have dated a lot of them, plus they didn't mind the turban/beard).

I live in an area with a very small ethnic population, so since Uni started, it has been harder for me to meet Punjabi girls. Last month, something unexpected happened to me. One of the white girls I have a class with, that I met at the beginning of the semester, asked me out. She is really smart, funny, we clicked the first day we met, plus she is extremely mature for her age, not the kind of girl who drinks or does drugs or goes clubbing and comes back at 3 am. Dare I say it, she acts more "Sikh" than almost all the Punjabi girls I've known throughout my life.

Anyways, so she asked me to go see a movie with her, and I said yes. It was a lot of fun and we've been out twice since then, and are going out again this weekend. She's pretty much everything I ever wanted in a girl: mature, does well in school, good morals and actually likes me for my beard and turban. She's been asking me about Sikhi since the beginning of the semester, when we first met (before we started dating), and she has a TON of respect for it, seriously I see her eyes light up when I tell her about Guru Arjan Dev Ji and Guru Tegh Bahadur Jis Shaheedis, the epic story of Vaisakhi 1699, the bravery of Mai Bhago leading an army of men into battle against an enemy of thousands, the sacrifice of Bhai Mani Singh and everything else that is our awesome history. She has been begging me to take her to Gurdwara, and like I said I live in an area with a few Sikhs, but the Gurdwara will be celebrating Miri Piri so that is when I will take her.

My question is, am I doing something wrong? I really couldn't ever see myself with a non-Punjabi girl, and this one isn't even from a Sikh background. I feel kind of hypocritical because one of my friends started dating a Muslim girl a few months ago, I was telling him he should stick to Sikh girls, so I feel a bit of guilt about this. On the flip side, she has wonderful morals and seems to really be interested in Sikhi. She has complete respect for the turban and beard and actually regards Guru Gobind Singh Ji as some sort of super hero lol.

So do I keep dating her and see what happens? Or would it be best if we part ways now, since I don't know how my parents will react (I've kind been doing it in secret).

you aint doing nothing wrong just make sure you convert your white gf who i assume is atheist or christian to Sikhi, Take her gurdwara, teach her gurbani. As for your Sikh mate who doing a muslim girl get him to convert her too. I noticed too alot of muslim girls are dating sikh guys but they tend to shy away from conversion because Sikh guys do not blackmail their chicks to convert for them nor do they teach them about Sikhism that needs to change but need to be done tactfully so that muslim girl doesnt get defensive about Islam rather she appreciates Sikhism more than she used to.

[sat]

Sikhs do not need to convert anyone , our Guru ji does not teach us that, but tells us to respect all religions, teach/tell her/him about sikhi and if she/he accept sikhi through love and respect of Guru ji then all the better. but better to know her/his views about this before you get in too deep like how/ which religion kids will brought up to follow etc.

[SikhKosh]

No to interreligious marriages, yes to interracial marriages where your partner accepts the Sikh way of life (be it your husband or your wife).

Go for it brother, teach her more about Sikhi (history + Japji Sahib is a minimum) and marry her.

[SunSingh]

veer ji, Guru ji's Hukam is that an Amritdhari can only marry another Amritdhari. Not marry someone, and then have them take Amrit afterwards. so be careful before getting in too deep. also, sikhs are not allowed to mess about before marriage, not even a little. Not saying that you're doing that btw, but gorian usually have different mindsets. Race and caste shouldn't be issues for Sikhs, unless you're thinking about them in terms of cultural compatibility.

[AmanSingh1867]

Thanks for the replies everyone, really appreciate it Most of you told me to stay with her, I think you're right, and especially after this weekend, I'm sure she's worth keeping around. Our Gurdwara celebrated Miri Piri today (Sunday), the Gurdwara has been packed since Friday evening. I always go with my buddies to do sewa and help out. I took her with me for the first time on Friday, she did matha tekh in front of Guru Ji, got parshad and sat down to listen to keertan with me. She comes from a non-practicing Christian family, she herself believes in God but not the Church. She is spiritual and has experience meditating. So she closed her eyes and let herself be carried away by the keertan, even though she couldn't understand it, she said it was extremely peaceful and easy to relax listening to it.

We went down to the langar hall after that. My friends were there, uncles and aunties I know were too. I introduced her and everyone was really nice, obviously since Miri Piri was only 2 days away it was really busy, lots of Sangat and a ton of work to do. Some of the aunties asked her if she wanted to learn how to make roti, she said yes and they took her with them to make roti for Sangat. Me and the guys were outside unloaidng supplies and setting up for the festival.

We all had langar together later on, and after that stayed to clean up. There were only a few of us and the kitchen was a mess, the langar hall was messed up as well. I was washing those huge pots and pans we make daal in with my friends in the back, she was cleaning up the smaller things with the other girls in the front. All of us were there past midnight, but it's always a ton of fun and this time was no different, we joke around and have fun, and when the work is done, warm up some milk, grab ladoos and a few other sweets and sit around talking about the day. She met all my Gurdwara friends that day and had a ton of fun cleaning up, most chicks would't be into that stuff but she really enjoyed it, even though it was her first time, everyone really took a liking to her and wants her to come back.

We were there Saturday and Sunday too. Sunday she learned about the concept of Miri and Piri, the life and times of Sri Guru HarGobind Sahib Ji, I can't believe how into Sikh history she is. We spent the entire day at the Gurdwara, yes we got stared at by some of the older uncles and aunties who did not know us and were casuals at the Gurdwara, but no one said anything bad and it was all good. The icing on the cake? I saw a girl from Uni who told me that she only dates cut-haired guys at the Miri Piri mela. I waved at her when I saw her and she waved back. We are still friends, I didn't take it personally when she turned me down so we still talk. I went over and started chatting, then my GF shows up after a few minutes. I introduce her and the Uni girls' jaw drops to the floor lol. She is visibly startled, but keeps it together and continues talking normally to me, glancing over at the GF every now and then. Then we leave to somewhere else in the Gurdwara, and I would occasionally look over at the girl from Uni and she would be staring at us from across the room. I was with my friends, the GF invited a few of her non-Sikh friends, all of us were having the time of our lives, and this girl was staring at us until she left to go home. Absolutely priceless hahaha

I hope everyone else had a wonderful Miri Piri weekend as well!

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa, Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh!

[Only five]

New events and occasions always bring the best out of people, but over time majority don't get the same good feeling they did the first time and they lose faith in the whole service, task, marriage, relationship, etc. Those brought up in western culture are always changing their minds and they don't see anything wrong with breaking ties and starting new ones just to keep themselves happy. Happiness is the goal for western raised people and not contentment.

Read up on Sikh history and sakhis that are told about devotion to Satguru. Sri Chand failed so did Laskhmi das, along with other children of the Gurus. Listen to the sakhi of Baba Buddha ji rejecting Satguru's wife's request and why he rejected it.

A smart businessman does not hand over his key to his child after one successful week. Long hours, sleepless nights, many stressful weeks, and many mistakes the child learns from gets him the golden ticket to a multi-million dollar operation.

Four years of hard work need to be put in before achieving a university degree. Even afterwards the most difficult job is presenting yourself as a professional before a panel of interviewers that throw the most difficult questions from ethics to proper conduct.

[N30S1NGH]

Sri Chand failed

I just wanted to let you know this is first time i reported your post to mod as i find it extremely insulting, but mostly off topic provoking statement intended to invoke an emotional angry reaction in totally different off-topic thread (what that has to do with the thread- dating a white girl) and besides in the past you have repeatedly attacked baba sri chand maharaj by your vile disgusting comments and with your one dimensional thinking/mindset....i will wait until their action regarding this post..just few seconds ago i be honest but i was swearing at you for first time on the computer for insulting son of guru nanak dev nirankar and bhramgyani, same bhramgyani- baba sri chand maharaj who recited ashtpadi 17th shalok- aad sach jugad sach hai bhi sach nanak hosi bhi sach on request of sri guru arjan dev ji.. but now i had to calm myself and come in terms as its all maharaj leela so right now i am doing ardas for you infront of maharaj so maharaj forgives you for doing nindya of bhramgyani.

[Only five]

Gone through this many times. Bhai Gurdas Ji's Vaar speaks clearly on Sri Chand and then Sant Baba Gurbachan Singh Ji doing katha on the vaar also says he sat very close to Satguru, but did not receive Satguru's kirpa because of his ego.

Bhai Gurdas ji's vaar:

http://sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=6143