Age Gap Marriage

[Not2Cool2Argue]

Idk doesnt dasam granth feature stories of old buddhe marrying young wives and it leading to destruction of the family? 

But u arent that old and men generally look younger than woman.

Also u might not find 25 year olds in india as girls r usually married off young, ppl r scared of them becoming old maids

But u might find some educated girls who r older, like someone else mentioned.

I think u shoild take a hukamnama to see if u should marry this girl or continue looking.

[jkvlondon]

Just now, Not2Cool2Argue said:

Idk doesnt dasam granth feature stories of old buddhe marrying young wives and it leading to destruction of the family? 

But u arent that old and men generally look younger than woman.

Also u might not find 25 year olds in india as girls r usually married off young, ppl r scared of them becoming old maids

But u might find some educated girls who r older, like someone else mentioned.

I think u shoild take a hukamnama to see if u should marry this girl or continue looking.

there should be plenty bibian out here due to college and career goals ...are you looking for an amritdhari bibi?

[Guest Jacfsing2]

30 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

yeah I can't see marriage then maklawa years later working ...

The rate at which people developed mentally was much faster than today and in future generations they will grow even slower than we are today. At around 30-40 years you were expected to die at those times, now life expectancy has doubled, (might be tripled in the next few generations), and if you didn't get married by age 20 nobody would marry you was the expected and realistic thing. (Though in Satyug you could marry at at least a few thousand years and still be fine as people aged slower back then). If we used the Sahibzadey ages to compare modern ages we would know the important factor of how quick they aged mentally and emotionally.

Fateh Singh, (7)- would be compared to a young teenager today around 13

Zorawar Singh, (9)- would be compared to an older teenager around 18-20

Jujhar Singh, (14)- would be compared to a young adult around 25

Fateh Singh, (16)- would be compared to mid-aged around 35

This was the reality to them, if someone studied for the average study time for a bachelor degree they would have died within 5 years of completing the degree, the rare exception was the legendary Baba Buddha who by today's standards would be considered 1000 years, and he was considered second only to whoever the light of Vaheguru and jot of Guru Sahib was at his time.

[jkvlondon]

2 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

The rate at which people developed mentally was much faster than today and in future generations they will grow even slower than we are today. At around 30-40 years you were expected to die at those times, now life expectancy has doubled, (might be tripled in the next few generations), and if you didn't get married by age 20 nobody would marry you was the expected and realistic thing. (Though in Satyug you could marry at at least a few thousand years and still be fine as people aged slower back then). If we used the Sahibzadey ages to compare modern ages we would know the important factor of how quick they aged mentally and emotionally.

Fateh Singh, (7)- would be compared to a young teenager today around 13

Zorawar Singh, (9)- would dbe compared to an older teenager around 18-20

Jujhar Singh, (14)- would be compared to a young adult around 25

Fateh Singh, (16)- would be compared to mid-aged around 35

This was the reality to them, if someone studied for the average study time for a bachelor degree they would have died within 5 years of completing the degree, the rare exception was the legendary Baba Buddha who by today's standards would be considered 1000 years, and he was considered second only to whoever the light of Vaheguru and jot of Guru Sahib was at his time.

Understood and agree , my Nana ji was 13 my Nani ji 15  ...and they were mature in every respect to bring up three generations (eldest bro - so brothers, then sons then grand sons) and settle them in their own lives  and the current gen complain about just getting their kids through to adulthood .

The farsightedness and willingness to start from scratch each time, sacrificing without complaint isn't lost on me of all our ancestors . 

[simran345]

Big Tera paji, a shabad for you, (also on another post).

 

 

[Big_Tera]

One other issue is height. The girl is alot shorter then me. I have always been attracted to taller women for some reason and find shorter women off putting. 

[Guest Jacfsing2]

3 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

One other issue is height. The girl is alot shorter then me. I have always been attracted to taller women for some reason and find shorter women off putting. 

Are you already engaged to this girl? (Advice will change depending on your answer).

[Big_Tera]

29 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

Are you already engaged to this girl? (Advice will change depending on your answer).

Kind of . Nothing is final yet. I would rather call it off now. Before things move forward. I dont see any issue in changing my mind.

[Guest Jacfsing2]

20 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

Kind of . Nothing is final yet. I would rather call it off now. Before things move forward. I dont see any issue in changing my mind.

If you are going to not want to be married to this girl, you should tell them immediately before it's too late; once it's finalized and you say, "no", you'll just disgrace yourself; and it will effect future chances of Rishtas; especially if they know about this incident. If you deny going forward, people might forgive you in future Rishta chances; but you can't delay any longer!

[MisterrSingh]

57 minutes ago, Big_Tera said:

One other issue is height. The girl is alot shorter then me. I have always been attracted to taller women for some reason and find shorter women off putting. 

Why do i feel you're being strong armed into this rishta?