"but we were going to get married..."

[puzzled]

3 minutes ago, Unknownlost said:

Man you have got animal magentism big time lol. Damn its so hard that you had so many temptations at a young age that you still haven't fallen into having many sexual partners.

Haha my shyness saved me lol, in my early 20s I was VERY shy. The gujarati woman used to tell me to send her a pic of my Willy but I didn't because I was really shy haha      

I think some women get a thrill out of playing around with inexperienced guys lol 

[Guest GuestSingh]

16 minutes ago, puzzled said:

Ravi singh said they first work out if it's a case of grooming or not, so they must gets girls ringing up and faking it 

dont know the protocol or how these things are established myself but imo it should be settled with age - 16 or above is really knowing better, especially when we're surrounded by more information and awareness than ever before...

my parents always drilled into my head 'dont talk to strangers, take gifts from them etc' and its a simple thing to remember and practice - unless the groomers physically force victims into cars, buildings etc. then whats really their excuse?

[Guest GuestSingh]

27 minutes ago, puzzled said:

Haha my shyness saved me lol, in my early 20s I was VERY shy. The gujarati woman used to tell me to send her a pic of my Willy but I didn't because I was really shy haha      

I think some women get a thrill out of playing around with inexperienced guys lol 

probably keeps them feel young before the rhino skin comes..

[Akalifauj]

52 minutes ago, GuestSingh said:

but arent they more likely to lie and keep it a secret?

was actually thinking about this the other day.. aint it better to just play it cool? i.e. tell them u dont mind if theyve had past boyfriends, already kissed or had sex etc? earn a bit of their trust..ask what theyve done in the past and what they get up to now and theyre more likely to share any dirty pasts and also things they wouldnt even consider revealing in 

This is exactly what to do.  Start off by saying everyone has a past.....and let her spill it all out.  Once in the open.  Play the game and be like it won't work out.  Don't tell her it's because she was with other men.  Make up another excuse and get the hell out.

[Guest GuestSingh]

9 minutes ago, Akalifauj said:

This is exactly what to do.  Start off by saying everyone has a past.....and let her spill it all out.  Once in the open.  Play the game and be like it won't work out.  Don't tell her it's because she was with other men.  Make up another excuse and get the hell out.

every singh should know this so it stops us all looking dumb and gullible and forces those girls to settle for what they deserve...

[Guest guest]

2 hours ago, puzzled said:

As a 20 year old inexperienced boy in my first job I was led on by this Gujarati woman in her 30s who had plenty of experience. She would lead me Into the fitting rooms and teach me how to kiss, and teach me how a "real man touches a woman" I was 20 and h0rny and attracted to her like a moth is to a light bulb haha She used to love teaching me things and when I used to get shy she used to laugh and say your a kid. when i used to touch her softly she used to laugh and say "be a man"   lol 

in what way were you, a 20 year old man (not boy), "led on"?  so you "were 20 and horny" is your excuse?  a woman could say the say thing.  and she did not 'lead you into fitting rooms'- you followed her there.  pathetic trying to shift the blame onto the oler woman here.  

your 'modest' boasting is also lame.

[Guest guest]

35 minutes ago, GuestSingh said:

every singh should know this so it stops us all looking dumb and gullible and forces those girls to settle for what they deserve...

i disagree.  this is "chalak" (sly, deception) and not befitting of a Singh/Sikh, who should have integrity and not be duplicitous.

[Akalifauj]

33 minutes ago, GuestSingh said:

every singh should know this so it stops us all looking dumb and gullible and forces those girls to settle for what they deserve...

Very true.  

[Guest Population Imbalance]

2 hours ago, GuestSingh said:

but arent they more likely to lie and keep it a secret?

was actually thinking about this the other day.. aint it better to just play it cool? i.e. tell them u dont mind if theyve had past boyfriends, already kissed or had sex etc? earn a bit of their trust..ask what theyve done in the past and what they get up to now and theyre more likely to share any dirty pasts and also things they wouldnt even consider revealing in marriage...

Exactly most will lie as a default position but some good ones might also pretend to be bad in order to weed out bad guys to catch them out. The spiritual level of the person at that moment in time should give the biggest clues as otherwise Amritdhari's like Bhai Jugraj Singh and Deepa Singh would be getting left, right and centre for their pre-Amritdhari past by Amritdhari Singhnian.

Also bear in mind that in Punjab for every 1000 Sikhs guys there are only about 889 females and that excludes all the girls going abroad on study (as girls are the majority who are passing IELTS to go abroad) so in practise there's about 950 Sikh guys for every 800 Sikh girls. 

But that aside bear in mind that both in Punjab and abroad there are about at least 5 times as many Amritdhari Singhs as there are Amritdhari Singhnian. So there is a demographic imbalance which will automatically force more and more Amritdhari Singhs to marry non-Amritdhari women. And in Punjab non-Amritdhari Sikhs simply have no choice but to (in may cases) marry women whose parents are not Sikh. We need to recognise this as a reality and not spread hate on Amritdhari's like Jagmeet Singh and Gurratan Singh and others who may not be perfect but are still on their own journey in Sikhi. If we just keep on protesting marriages of Amritdhari Singhs with non-Amritdhari women then all we are doing is hastening the demographic decline of the Sikh Panth like our enemies want to see.

 

[MisterrSingh]

11 hours ago, GuestSingh said:

makes u wonder how many of these 'grooming victims' are actually the victim, especially when they lie about their age and look older than they appear - makeup is a dangerous thing...

I tend to believe the children who've fallen prey to the groomers are the true victims. Plus, it's not merely about age and applying a certain cut-off point after which someone is adjudged to be lying. In the cases of university-age Sikh girls, one can easily discern whether the victim is an actual victim of grooming, or whether they've been playing with fire and find themselves in over their heads, and realise the only way out of the situation is to cry wolf. I've heard of many, many cases where the latter was discovered to be true after some investigation. The "no makeup and head covered with a chunni" routine once the 5hit hits the fan is a surprisingly common tactic to fool certain individuals into believing the "victim" was blameless. It's a dark, dark world out there. Keep your eyes open. If it's too good to be true, it usually is.