Can't Tolerate Wife Drinking With 'colleagues'

[Heera Singh]

I think you need ta tell her straight up that you wann a wife who dun drink.. the past is the past... can't change that, but u can prevent getting into a situation like dat in tha future... why would u marry sum1 with different values from you?... obviously u gonna have differences, but things like these are BIG obstacles... and like a person above said, ask her if she would choose alcohol over you... you obviously have feelings for this person, and I'd hope she has tha same feelings fa you... marriage is bout compromise, in mah personal opinion her compromising in this situation is not askin fah too much.. she said she does it once a month or so, so den it wouldn't be a big loss to her to not do it at all...

marriage is a HUGE life moment... dun wait to talk to her, tell her everythin straight.. get everythin on the table.. if u dun wann to marry sum1 who drinks, tell her straight up... tha's nah CONTROLLING.. the longer ya wait, tha harder it gonna be.. and it gonna save a lot of fighting within tha marriage... which mite even end up to divorce...

can't wait fa thingz ta happen.. gotta make em happen yaself..!

BLESSSSSSS

[MAX]

I don't drink, my wife drinks on average once every 3 weeks. She doesn't get drunk, she knows her limits, she has at maximum 2 glasses of wine with a meal. It's p!ssed me off that she goes out with workmates now and then and drinks, because there are men there, some of them turbaned Singhs, who are also drinking, it's not a good thing. If I say anything to her, she says "They're just work colleagues", yet her sister was harrassed by a p@ki at her work, wasn't he just a colleague too? She also brings up the fact that I used to drink with girls at Uni, but this was years ago, I learnt better, and she wasn't with me then. She also had something really bad happen to her when she used to get really drunk, I posted about that here before. She says she has learnt from that not to get drunk, but why drink anyway?, and why hang around men who are drinking? (without me being there?). It got to the point where she said I should have married a 'freshie'. I don't want to treat her like a child, but how can I make her see she is wrong? (she says she's not wrong) and keep her out of danger?, I can't remind her of the bad thing that happened because she'll think I always use that to score points. I haven't told her to stop drinking, I just asked her to not drink when she goes out for meals with her work colleagues. When I'm firm, I just get accused of being 'controlling' and 'old skool'.

Mm...you say that her sister was harassed? But that doesn't mean that she will be harassed. And if she is, I'm sure she'll be able to stand her ground and let you know if such a situation were ever to arise.

She sounds responsible and trustworthy enough from what you've said. I don't think you have anything to worry about, but that last part is up to you I guess.

Good luck :TH:

[Heera Singh]

I dun agree wit Max... I doubt she'd say nethin if she WAS harassed, because then she'll know that veerji was rite... from experience, women dun say nethin bout men harassin them 90% of the time.. especially in cases where the man says don't do somethin, and they do it anywayz... they dun wanna hear the 'i tol u so' speech..