What Should This Husband Do?

[gupt_pappi]

Hmmm, at the end of the day, what will go with this guy into his next life? Sikhi or Wife?

You never know, if this guy goes for Sikhi then he may become a ChardiKala Gursikhs or BrumGiani lol

We can talk about this as much as we want but the only solution is Ardaas and/or Hukamnamma!

[khalsaforce]

Maybe they can have a conversation to solve this matter. They can both discuss the religion sikhism and the important aspects of Sikhism. He can tell her whatever is inside him about sikhi that matters to him alot because husband and wife are supposed to support each other on things that are important to both of them. I am sure he supports her on her views and she should be supporting his views also. Explain her the importance of Sikhi and how it will help them both and their children forever. Also tell him not to be scared to show his views on importance of sikhi and stand on his love for sikhi. If the wife loves him with a shave face then she can love him with a Dharra(beard) parkash and a pagg on the head. If she sayd no to pag then she doesn't love him or she is scared of others.

I think this issue is very difficult I dont know if anyone can think of a good answer.

I see people are being disrespectful towards her but thats not helping. She is right in a way because she had that simple condition BEFORE marriage. I already thought maybe we could change her mind somehow but i dont see how. she is quite stubborn.

[Pakandi baba]

I think this issue is very difficult I dont know if anyone can think of a good answer.

I see people are being disrespectful towards her but thats not helping. She is right in a way because she had that simple condition BEFORE marriage. I already thought maybe we could change her mind somehow but i dont see how. she is quite stubborn.

She had her prefrences to begin with so i guess she's not at fault here.

But...now she has to think, did she just marry for his appearance? If so does she not love him enough to allow him to keep the paag and dhari, as this would please him and make him happier?

But if the push comes to the shove, they'll just have to divorce due to her stubborness and he'll manage to find another person who'll love him for his Sikhi. She'll be giving her reason for divorce as' Well he decided to keep his hair so i left him'' lol

[Jassika]

If the wife loves him with a shave face then she can love him with a Dharra(beard) parkash and a pagg on the head. If she sayd no to pag then she doesn't love him or she is scared of others.

i'm sure theyve tried talking about it several times over the last 8 months.

I agree her love should be strong enough to accept him in any way he looks and not being comfortable in public might be weak but it might be that she doesnt believe in keeping it for other reasons.

[khalsaforce]

so they already talked about it and the wife still wont allow him to keep hair and wear a pag. What is the reason for not lettin him keep his sikh identity?is she not a sikh?

If the wife loves him with a shave face then she can love him with a Dharra(beard) parkash and a pagg on the head. If she sayd no to pag then she doesn't love him or she is scared of others.

i'm sure theyve tried talking about it several times over the last 8 months.

I agree her love should be strong enough to accept him in any way he looks and not being comfortable in public might be weak but it might be that she doesnt believe in keeping it for other reasons.

[dust of ur sweet charan]

vaheguruji ka khalsa vaheguruji ki fateh

always thought that marriage was about compromise, communication, respect, understanding and unconditional love for each other and each others' sikhi..... he should not cut his kesh to please his wife.... and its sad he has been put in that position.... with Guruji's kind grace once the seed of sikhi has been planted within that home and marriage then Guruji themselves will let it flourish and flower.... the broji should do Chaupai Sahib.... forgiveness if anything out of line has been said.... dhur of your sweet sweet charan

vaheguruji ka khalsa vaheguruji ki fateh

[Singh With Dunalli]

Ardas to Sri Guru Granth Sahib to help him out, and explain the situation in front of Guru Granth Sahib by himself.

Secondly, explain the history and kurbani given to keep the kesh, and say that we cannot call ourselves Sikh without hair, you will become Patits.

*EDITED*

[S1ngh]

My brother used to be mona and he was somehow religious (doens't eat meat, drink etc...) during his skool years... We (our family) never thought that someday he will come back into sikhi roop.. So anyway.. he got engaged and married(girl side were looking for mona.. typical).. His life got changed an year after his marriage.. he started growing beard, hair and now he became full keshadhari sikh.. He is very changed in appearance and he do not wear turban all the time as he can't tie his hair knot yet (u can picture him looking like swami ramdev lol). Even after all of this.. my sister-in-law accepted it happily because it seems that she see more deeper than the outer physical appearance... They both are happy with the changes they had in such short period of time.

It is very hard for ppl to understand the concept of outer and inner beauty specially very hard for female gender to understand.. we can say that it as human nature. Maturity and religious nature needs to be the only way to solve such issues. When choosing your partner, appearance should not play the important role and ppl who do that will have to suffer later on with stuff like divorce, separation etc.. Divorce comes when we have high level of EGO inside us and fail to compromise.. So what if he decides to grow hair back.. Is her marriage solely based on appearance?? Is she using this issue to simply get rid of him? Its not her fault because she choose the mona person to start her life with... but before getting married both should think or discuss about the possible changes that might come in their future life... and it did.. Now they both should not think that they are alone and can do whatever they want.. They should focus on their child and accept each other in the form that our waheguru sent the human in.

[Jasy]

I think that they should talk with each other and each of them should explain their point of view and he should definetely tell her about sikhi and show her that many people had to give up their lives to preserve their sikhi and heres a video that he can possibly shoe her

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.ppa?showtopic=23449

Moreover, he should tell her that if she loves him then she should accept in any form. I understand that she had that very condition before marriage but he has to explain to her that people change, circumstances and everyday you learn something new about sikhi and the life we are suppose to have and also, he shouldnt yell at her or fight or threathen, you that type of stuff because that will only aggravate her and make her even more stubborn he has to be patient and kind in order to get her to understand where he stands and how much sikhi means to him. and im sure we can find a shabad in which it explains the consequences of cutting your hair. none ring a bell rite now but im sure the sangat will be able to find one and he can read her that shabad and tell her the meaning and hopefully Guru Ji has Kirpa on her and she understands the true meaning of life.

Bhul Chukh Maaf

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

[kurtas]

try some fake sant baba.. women usually listen to them

Shame Pehowa no longer travels to Canada.