What Should This Husband Do?

[S1ngh]

There are lots of couples who are facing these problems which often dealt in private (brushed up under the carpet). Having beard and being mona does not make any character difference. It takes common sense and maturity to understand the changes and in sikhi we are not suppose to judge anyone by its look. It's typical western culture to judge other person by its physical appearance.

People (supposed to be Sikh) who don't appreciate Sikhs in Turban or full beard should accept that hard fact that they don't like our history singhs and guru sahibs. There is no point of following sikhi when one doesn't respect the basic foundation of our guru sahibs. Also don't judge the whole neighborhood just by the actions of few ppl.

In this case girl is in complete fault and i just wish good luck to the couple and hope they dont end up in separation.

[Pakandi baba]

hmmmm overall i dont like these answers and i'm thinking i should tell him to shave because i dont like to see the girl unhappy. she said he could grow it in 5 years anyway so it's pretty fair

5 years? Is she hoping that he'll forget all about it by then?

She's pathetic if you ask me. *EDITED*

[Pakandi baba]

You can keep making all the excuses you want, but your "friend" or whoever it is refuses to listen to anything, so what's the point of even encouraging her, she is weak. She is not made for Sikhi. I personally don't even care about this anymore. But, if the man wants to keep it, than he must because Guru is more important than a women. Guru Gobind Singh layed his whole family on the line for religion, and here we are complaining about a women who refuses to listen in the first place. I can't believe there are women out there that don't encourage there man to have Sikhi Saroop. What a messed up, and pathetic world we live in.

WEAK!

But brother that would mean she too would have to give up her *EDITED* ways. *EDITED*

Admin Note: Please don't use harsh words. Thanks

[Pakandi baba]

Why edit my posts admin? Because the person does not like the truth? Well it's true. They moan that muslims take advantage then wonder why. Answer is they put themselves in that postion to begin with.

[Balwinder Singh]

....................... and in sikhi we are not suppose to judge anyone by its look. It's typical western culture to judge other person by its physical appearance.............

I do not agree. In eastern cultures also, people judge others on their appearance. This is basic human nature......we do it just to "feel" secure of the unknown.

[rimmel]

.

[Jasy]

well he accepted her vow before marriage so stop insulting her. nowadays having a beard and turban hardly even mean anything. there are so many "gianis gone bad" out there and so many GOOD monas too. it was just her preference.

I personally find full beards are telling me "dont touch me" because to me it just represents sikhism is against any lust. blaaah my opinion about this whole thing feels kinda messed thats why im hesitating to help on this one

sweety, not too break ur lil bubble there but if u dont want our advice or u dont want to understand .. then y are u even askin for help ... i mean ur are finding an excuse for everythin we say .. mayb our Gurus kurbanis mean nothing to you and that girls Condition means more ... today is sad sad day because no offense u juz failed Guru Ji by sayin that its ok to be a Mona

Bhul Chukh Maaf

Waheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Waheguru Ji Ki Fateh

[Pakandi baba]

he's been growing his beard for 8 months and his wife's been complaining saying she's uncomfortable travelling with him etc.

The rest of his family including his in-laws has turbans but she is totally against it.

They have a kid about 3 yrs old and he wants to set a good example.

she said he could grow it in 5 years anyway so it's pretty fair

erm really do not want to tread on anyone's toes but honestly does she not feel 'uncomfortable' with the rest of the turban people in her family? He might have presented as a clean shaven guy but marriage is about thick and thin - thats the promise you make infront of the Guru. People change all the time...and I don't get why she says wait 5 years and you can keep it but why not now then??

They have a kid - if they are having problems now over a very little thing then they are gonna have to decide the way they want to raise their kid. I know this one man who was sikh. His wife was a reckon abit 'punjabi' and whilst he went to work she cut the sons hair cos she says it takes her too long to comb it. He came home and was so upset. Her arguement was that if they want to be Singhs then they can do it when they grow up. Never happened. He never made too much of a big deal out of it cos he loved her more than she loved him.

nowadays having a beard and turban hardly even mean anything. there are so many "gianis gone bad" out there and so many GOOD monas too. it was just her preference.

You what? Mona and Giana got nothing to do with this discussion darlin....its about her issue with beards and turbans...especially on her husband. Forget good or bad actions...she has a problem with that look. Maybe she should ask herself why. We all know he is the same and as husband and wife your meant to fall in love with each other souls so she shouldn't really have this issue...cos physically its gonna get more uglier the older you get...just visit nursing homes... Also as a Sikh you keep natural look its part of being one with yourself and that meaning is always there regardless. Either you see it or not.

personally find full beards are telling me "dont touch me" because to me it just represents sikhism is against any lust. blaaah my opinion about this whole thing feels kinda messed thats why im hesitating to help on this one

Seems like you also have some issue with beards aswell. Kinda interesting.

All I'm gonna say is that if he does what she says then he loves her alot more than she can love him. I don't give a damn about her original condition - she should face the now rather than saying but i told you...also it'll be interesting to know why she feels 'uncomfortable' and also why you feel kinda messed about this.

If i were her friend I would tell her straight that when you love someone you love them with all your heart and you don't give a damn about what anyone else thinks or say. If then if she still is unsure then maybe the problem is not other people but her...prehaps she just doesn't love him. Harsh but true.

You've summed it all up bhainji! - She's happy for the other members of her family kpeeing it. Maybe she don't talk to them either, because it makes her feel htey are saying 'don't touch me'

[davindervirk]

Maybe these two individual should discuss the problem among themselves, why should you interfere with their own personal business? So what if you are emotional attached to them. Just back off and its in god hands.

[kaur_khalistani_lioness]

jassika ...lil update would help? i just read this topic! wow!

there is something called spiritual life....and purpose to this life..which someof us are forgetting whilst talkin about this issue here.

and Jesica u might be able to help them (if u really want to) by understanding Asa ki // ur self! u will find ur answers there. its all about life hun! answers to our daily life questions/problems.

life is too short....nd the girl needs to think about it when she tells him that wait 5 more yrs. is she guaranteeing that he would get to see the next 5 yrs? sikh isn't even sure about his/her next breath...and here someones sayin wait 5 more yr!

bhul chuk muaf karni!

waheguru ji kakhalsa waheguru ji ki fateh!