Need Some Advice

[sikhwarrior_88]

i used to be a mona, at the age of 15 i started keepin ma kesh, i am now 19.

i was recently speaking to an amritdarhi person on msn, n this person made me realise that im not putting sikhi 1st, she made a comment like 'u chose 2 go 2 a party rather than jap naam'.

this comment hit me very hard, n it made me think of hw bad i am, i've felt similar to this b4 but i always try changin, it only lasts about 3 days.

i can never wake up in the morning to do paat, i dnt even try anymore,

i've realised that i cant change the way i am yet, because i no i havent gt the willpower to do paat,n i will stil go to these parties, n i feel ashamed, walking in to these kind of places with a big pagh n darhi.

i came 2 the conclusion that maybe i do not deserve to represent sikhs, especially as i go to places like these, so i thot of getting rid of ma kesh, so as not 2 disrespect it.

[Singhstah]

please please rethink before you do such a big thing as cutting kesh. Listen bruv, im not the type of person to preach, but how do you know that if you cut it now, you will ever want to grow it back? Guroo Sahib Ji did kirpa on you when he made you grow your kesh at 15, now do you really want to throw that away just to go partying?

Please Please, im begging you to think of Guroo Sahib Ji, please, why dont you do an ardas to Guroo Sahib Ji, and then take a hukamnama about your sitiuation, if you havent got access to guroo granth sahib ji, then take it from here after doing a heartfelt ardas http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?random=1.

Think of the hurt done to Guroo Ji if you remove your kesh, because thats not your kesh ur cutting, every Sikhs kesh is Guroo Sahibs kesh, because every Sikhs body belongs to Guroo Sahib. So do you really want to give Guroo Saihb that pain?

Bro you are Guroo Gobind Singh Jis son, every father wants his son to make him proud, you can make Guroo Gobind Singh Ji proud by atleast taking one step further, and that one step of yours is up to you, what counts is that you do something. Remember wat sant jarnail singh JI sed, "what do you call a son who does not look like his father"?

"Bina shastr kesang narang bhed jano. Gahe kaan tako kitey le sidhano.

Ehe mor agiya suno le piare. Bina Tegh Kesang divo n didare."

" Without weapons and Kesh - you are nothing but a sheep - who can be led anywhere by the ear

A order has come from the master, without un-cut hair and weapons do not come before me "

Please forgive me if I offended you at all, just trying to help

Fateh

[BulldozerWarga$ingh]

Just start off easy by listening to kirtan, reading bani, doing simran and attending good sangat at your local gurdwara(s) and the rest (waking up at amritvela, willpower etc...) will come by itself as GURU JI will start doing kirpa on you and bless you with RASS (to do more). And when you get that RASS you will automatically stop listening to bhangra/hiphop/rap/crazyness, going to parties, watching TV serials and wasting your time on these (useless) stuff because you will KNOW that you need NAAM and KIRPA OF GURU JI and you love GURU JI - and not this CRAZY WORLDLY MAYA.

Just make a start and the rest will come by itself.

Oh yeh, read or listen to Sri Dasam Granth bani da Kirtan or Paath as Guru Ji has specifcally blessed us with it for attaining Will Power, Warrior Spirit, Determination and Positeviness.

Here are some Paath's and Bani's by Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji Maharaj:

Chaupai Sahib

Jaap Sahib

Shaster Naam Mala

Bachitar Nattak

Akaal Ustat

Oh yeh, theres some good English Katha on www.GurmatVechaar.com - very inspiring and motivational.

JUST MAKE A START AND GURU SAHIB WILL AUTOMATICALLY DO KIRPA ON YOU.

DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME EVEN FURTHER BY CUTTING YOUR KESH - THATS THE DEVIL OF MAYA AND IGNORANCE INSIDE YOU TRYING TO GET YOU EVEN FURTHER OUT OF SIKHI!

[jii]

On the day one is born, they are already dying. Death count downs from the start of birth. How many years will one go on living in on life, 67, 78, 80 even. But is that it, its only a few years. Re-uniting with God is for eternity.

You are 19 now, how long from now are you going to get married and settle down with kids? By 30 will you still be going to parties as much, or will you be spending the time supporting your family. By the time your 30 or 40, how old will your parents be? Will you be doing sava for them, praying for them, or going partying?

Drinking brings out the devil in people. Praying brings God into your life.

Only you can decide what you want to do, we can only guide you. I hope you make the right choice. Remember one step at a time.

I hope this helps you to decide.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHd-GlC3q0o

[singh1986]

Give it time and don’t make any rash decisions. In time you will grow out of and tired of the partying lifestyle people our age go through. I know people say that with Kesh and Pagh you are representing Sikhi, this can be a lot of pressure on someone…but you gotta live your life and cement your relationship with Guru Ji through the experiences you go through. Nobody is perfect, try slowly to phase out your partying lifestyle. Surround yourself in good Sangat and then slowly begin to bring more bani, Paath and Simran into your life…this is a process that may take 50 years lol but keeping Kesh is the first footstep; don’t go backwards…you already know how hard it is to make that first step, well its harder when your older.

O and don’t presume that if you cut your Kesh you wont feel less ashamed or uncomfortable going to Parties…your brain goes through phases at this moment in time you want to go out and party but imagine your anguish when you want and need that spiritual connection when you know you’ve committed a major sin and turned your back on Sikhi. It’s your choice whether you want to jeopardize a lifetime of Sikhi for 3 maybe 4 more years of partying?!?

Also not everyone is at the same stage, this Bibi is probably very much at a higher level, don’t judge yourself by her standards…set your own and slowly raise them.

And what do you mean by partying? I see nothing wrong with socializing and a jiggle lol. For me Sikhi isn’t all about sitting all day and praying…go out there and enjoy life but not too much lol.

Just go at your own pace! You can’t just straight away put Sikhi First, you gotta grow the love; you’ve already placed the seed…now start watering. :umm: instead of ripping the seed back out again.

Forgive me if I said anything wrong during my waffle.

[ocelot]

Sar Sri Akal,

You are just confused, i can really say that you are only in few which have kirpa of guru. As there are only few people who cut there hairs and realise it and then again keep at such young age. So dont be disheartened.

Sikhi starts and ends with Bani that is to live by wishes of God, and realise each event in life as his wish. There is no other way, one has to do path to be a sikh. You can start by few pages. I can say Sukhmani Sahib is very easy to understand, even if you dont know Punjabi there will be an english translation. Initially you have full day , do path of even one page daily, but with the meaning of it and in no time you will start to become a sikh. But you have to try.

If you cant do it just start by listening to path, but without there meaning there is no use of listening to Bani.

Remember there are always two ways in life one is easy and other is right. You should always do the right things , to be happy in life. i can say there is no other happiness in life other then reciting bani, it gives you so much happiness that you can never dream. reading bani has so much impact on one's Psychology. So it is really pity for sikhs who do not recite bani. I really feel sad for them.

There is line in Bani "Nachna Tapana Maan Da Chau"

Life is very small, remember death daily, by doing so you will always do the right, As i remember daily that death is approaching fast, and there is no other companion except Guru.

Just tell me does drinking or going to parties ever satisfy you fully, or there is desire for more of them. The point is no wordly thing can ever be satisfied, so why to run after such things for which ones lust for more is never over.

I am only small person, i am sorry if i have said something wrong.

WaheGuru jee da Khalsa|

WaheGuru jee de fateh||

[sikhwarrior_88]

i dnt drink smoke or do drugs etc.

i go to these places to enjoy my self, but also because a lot of sikh boys and girls say that they feel safer when we are there.

i understand what everybody is saying, it is the same things that my amritdarhi friends have said to me, but i no that rite now i am feeling like this, so i have started doin paat n stuff, but it wnt last, i just go through this cycle of feeling bad, then doin paat n simran, n then carrying on my normal lifestyle, then i feel bad again.

i have been told to do ardaas and get hukhamnama from guru ji, but i no that if i break the hukham from guru ji, it is a great paap.

i also feel that i grew my hair for the wrong reason in the first place, i was not prepeared to give myself to the guru fully.

[jii]

i dnt drink smoke or do drugs etc.

i go to these places to enjoy my self, but also because a lot of sikh boys and girls say that they feel safer when we are there.

i understand what everybody is saying, it is the same things that my amritdarhi friends have said to me, but i no that rite now i am feeling like this, so i have started doin paat n stuff, but it wnt last, i just go through this cycle of feeling bad, then doin paat n simran, n then carrying on my normal lifestyle, then i feel bad again.

i have been told to do ardaas and get hukhamnama from guru ji, but i no that if i break the hukham from guru ji, it is a great paap.

i also feel that i grew my hair for the wrong reason in the first place, i was not prepeared to give myself to the guru fully.

In not drinking and in going through this notion of feeling bad, there is something inside of you already making you feel like this. In your heart you feel that you are disrespecting sikhi by having kesh and doing such acts like going to parties.

Your probably do feel something towards sikhi that you do not already know, which has made want to cut your hair, by not putting sikhi down by portraying the image you have at now.

I really don’t see that you cant go to parties and do what you what so long, it is your life. But even if you do have kesh and still wish to do the following, so long as you have God in mind and not other images that may influence you in doing certain acts that I think that is fine. At least that should keep you on the right track.

Being a Sikh does not mean that people can not lead normal lives and joke around with their mates even if it is at parties with music playing; so long as you can accept when you leave that that is all it is and nothing more.

[CaptainC]

You dont drink or do drugs which is a good thing.

Saying you go to parties to enjoy yourself and other sikh boys and girls feel safer when you lot are around.......Is this not encouraging more people to go since they feel that its a "Safe" enviroment and think its fine.

Parties can be fun but it dont last long at all. As soon as its over you go to sleep you aint gonna wake up thinking waow i feel great just from a wicked party you had the night before.

This whole thing of wanting to of parties/clubs/gigs will always effect people. Its always temting to go and we always think yeah if we go we can just have a good laugh and thats i but long term its not realy helping at all is it.

The whole guilt trip your going through is understandable because ive had it before aswell but from my point of view from reading your 2 posts you have a "fear" or hesitation of moving forward. I could be wrong but thats just how i feel at this moment. Doing your paath now and stuff is really good but dont have it fixed in your head that you will stop at some point once you are over this "faze" because you dont have to. Willpower is something everyone has in them but can only happen if they realyyyy do want something. You need to find yourself sangat in your local area, this may be people at your level who are willing to progress in Sikhi or have an interested in it. Finding CK Gursikhs who you can meet often will have a large effect on you aswell. Perhaps partner up with someone or people who you may want to meet every day or on weekends and do paath together. Set eachother targets, talk about different aspects of sikhi, talk about yourselves and how you feel about things. Just little things like this will makes a worlds worth of difference.

You said you have amridhari friends! Make use of that!

Also i HIGHLY recommend that you go either Sikhi Camp (Boss) or Khalsa Camp this summer if possible. The effect those camps have on you are phenomenal!!! That weeks experience you will get at camp you will most probably not get anywhere else.

Ipod....Mp3 playerrr...... which ever you have. put some good kirtan on it. Let it play in you ears as much as it can. Reduce the amount of songs you listen to or atleast filter out what is inappropriate!!!

Just little things liek this make a diff

Another thing. .........What ive always believed is..........If a little voice or a gut feeling inside you is telling you that you shouldnt be a a specific place, shouldnt be doing whatever you are ........Its Waheguru telling you dont do it.

[Bored]

somthings wrong with u...nothing else...why dont u get up and do sumtin about it insted of complaining?

u make it wat u make it...so do sumtin to change it.

Guru Gobind Singh Ji tried, to keep you on the right track

You gave Him your head, but then you took it back

Turning your back on Guru Ji, how did it feel?

Or were you too busy convicing yourself, that "It's really no big deal"

Remember that day when you took Amrit and made a vow?

What happened to those promises, who is your Guru now?

You sold out your Sikhi, and that’s the plain truth

You ruined this precious life, saying "I want to enjoy my youth"

To make yourself feel better, you can say whatever you want to

But one dreadful day, your words will come to haunt you

And when that day comes, you will regret what you have done

You lost your honour, in a battle you should have won

This world is just maya, it will take your Sikhi away

Tell me, did you forget that you are gonna die one day?

When this dream called life reaches its end

Then who will be your saviour, your helper, your True Friend?

There is still hope, you need to sharpen your mind

Go towards Guru Ji, and the Truth you will find

To merge with God, you were sent to earth

Trying to impress the world, you wasted the human birth

Did you think of those mothers, who wore their babies around their necks?

Or did all you think about, was attracting the opposite sex?

The very same hair that Guru Ji put Amrit in

You grabbed the scissors, and committed the ultimate sin

Guru Ji's Sons gave their lives, so you can be a Sikh

Their Sikhi remained strong, with each and every brick

Now is the time, for you to wake up and take control

Guru Ji is the water, that will sooth your burning soul

Do you really want to come back to this hell on earth?

Wandering and suffering, birth after birth

You say you're not ready to take Amrit, thats always your reply

But think about this...are you ready to die?

You think you'll practice Sikhi, in the future when you are old

But tell me, do you know when your body will turn cold?

When it’s all said and done, you will be full of sorrow and regret

You'll want to go to Sach Khand, but the requirements were not met

Guru Ji's arms are wide open, and He is waiting for you

It’s time to take action, and do what you gotta do

Change your life RIGHT NOW!, don't wait another day

Tomorrow may never come, then what will be left to say?

That Guru Gobind Singh Ji tried to put me on the right track

I gave Him my head, but then I took it back.

JO BOLE SO NIHALLLLLLLLLLLLLL..........................