Why marriage?

[Khalsa4ever]

vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw!

vwihgurU jI kI &iqh!!

I think the answer to why marriage may lie in the fact that we are not supposed to lust! Guru has taught us that we should be living a normal life, fulfill our biological functions as well as our spiritual functions, without having our biological functions controlling us (like ok to reproduce, and not act like some of those yogis who shut themselves out from the world).

Since s. e.x is a biological function that is often controlling, it might be that by forcing ourselves into monogomy (ie: marriage with a single person), we might be able to more easily control the power that this has over us.

Just a really twisted theory!!

vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw!

vwihgurU jI kI &iqh!!

[Deep Singh]

so all this must be a test then....like are we able to control lust...stick to one partner. jepp could be what can i say jee.....

me manmukh do not know anything jee, best way is to read Bani..it always answers it is just so amazing..so clear...so straight forward...Waheguru! no this and that...but it touchs our inner at once...we can relate ourselfes...

thanks for the contributions jee

[Jassika]

for marriage people follow quite a few rituals like rubbing that yellow besan on the bride and groom, dipping bangles in milk and putting them on, making some design out of colored flour and rice, throwing money around, etc. I dont understand the significance of some of these. Are sikhs supposed to be against these? I dont think its important to make too much of a big deal about them since they're just fun things to do but I'm just wondering if Sikhs consider those ok??

[Deep Singh]

Well,

i logical way to find out if they are good or bad it to do as following:

- find out why they are followed

- is there any cultural/religious system behind that, ie what is he justification

- if so, is the ethics followed considered by Gurmat as positive or not.

- if Gurmat speaks against that, then one should not follow those rituals/kastums

- if Gurmat is neutral to that and the Panth has not made any code against the rituals, then the local sangat may decide whether it is ok or not

- all along it is important to have in mind that 'it is for fun' and not neccesarily something bad...

- it is important to consider according to the kaam, krodh, lobh, moh, hankar..so on things that weaken us.

so i do not know the history behind these rituals, if someone has some info then they might check it...

[Mkhalsa]

a gurmukhs weding doesnt involve bhangra, doesnt involve drinking, meat, baisan rubbing, giving dowry, coming in on a horse, wearing lots of gold/makeup, etc etc

a gurmukhs wedding is simple, but beautiful and elegant and puts a punjabi wedding to shame.

[Jkaur]

i totally agree with veerji mkhalsa above... ive yet to see any weddin of dat sort but ive seen pics... and i was soooo amazed...

[Deep Singh]

Khalsa jee

bhangra, - well it is "for fun" but we all know what happens....after some glass whisky ppl start dancing bhangra and into lust...such dancing is against Gurmat. Guru Granth Sahib talks against it. i remember a quote Son of Guru Gobind Singh jee gave a while back.

drinking, - no allowed, i agree with Khalsa Bhaji

meat, - nope (i guess meat only allowed to be taken in "acute need, when there is no other substance to survive, and the purpose of our life is important then just staying alive." i think this when jathka can be used)

baisan rubbing, - i have no idea where this tradition comes from, somene explain

giving dowry, - unsure, dowry is not good. but Bhai Gurdas jee in the Varan gives following explaination of a women's life/status

http://www.sikhitothemax.com/page.asp?ShabadID=5667

Bhai Sahib mentions dowry too. i am unsure if he recognizes dowry as a part of Sikh culture or is just giving a scetch of contempary punjabi culture...?

coming in on a horse, - no idea why it is followed....maybe in Sikh weeding both men and women should come on horses...we remember Mata Sahib Kaur jee

wearing lots of gold/makeup, - no it is just for show, Gursikhijeevan is not like that...

[Jassika]

so does no bhangra mean no reception or party?

[moorakh mugadh]

vwihgurU jI kw Kwlsw!

vwihgurU jI kI &iqh!!

well said deep veer

[Mkhalsa]

oh.. gurmukhs have a party and get drunk..

but their party is a rainsbaee or akhand patt..

and they get drunk on naam..

oh boy do they get drunk