Jump to content

Relationship Before Marriage


Pheena
 Share

Recommended Posts

getting involved in relationships before marraige is a waste of time.
how is it not a waste of time, after marraige?

Marriage is gurmat, according to the gurus teachings. you do laava around mahraj and you both make mahraj the centre of your lives. you help each other to reach mahraj. you help each other in ur jeevan. the anad kaaraj is blessed by guru jee. and is done in front of guru granth sahib jee where ardas is also done.

now if you havent been married, you get into a relationship, it nearly always leads to manmat things. if you got involved with someone physically then decided not to get married to them....then youy move on to someone else??? this dating, this isnt gurmat, this is lust.

ideally a marriage should be arranged by guru sahib, everything should be left to mahraj. this finding someone yourself and getting into a relationship before hand gets out of hand.

if you think that having a relationship before marriage is ok then fine, but i suggest you speak to the panj piayre first. is it really gonna help you in ur sikhi?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 73
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

is it really gonna help you in ur sikhi?
we do a lot of things that dont help our sikhi.

but anyways we are going off topic here, as usual rolleyes.gif

answer pheena ji's original question

Where did the "relationships before marriage are forbidden" thought in sikhi came from?

Can someone give me a Rehatnama or a quote from the Guru that forbids a relationship?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

is it really gonna help you in ur sikhi?
we do a lot of things that dont help our sikhi.

lol yes i know. but we shouldnt. our aim is to do postive actions which will help us with our jeevan. our aim is to make mahraj the centre of our lives. unfortunalty we have maya which overcomes us and leads us elsewhere.

but we should put all the effort into doing whats best for our jeevan...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

is it really gonna help you in ur sikhi?
we do a lot of things that dont help our sikhi.

lol yes i know. but we shouldnt. our aim is to do postive actions which will help us with our jeevan. our aim is to make mahraj the centre of our lives. unfortunalty we have maya which overcomes us and leads us elsewhere.

but we should put all the effort into doing whats best for our jeevan...

ok lemme say this, what if you find someone that compliments your sikhi but you guys are say only 19 and can't get married now. what would you do? see them as a bro/sis, well then you can throw out marraige out the window right then.

things aren't always as black and white as most kids think these days.

please stop going off - topic, case in point, "peacemaker" and KKV. some acutally come to learn here, not to paa gandh

Link to comment
Share on other sites

<<<<ok lemme say this, what if you find someone that compliments your sikhi but you guys are say only 19 and can't get married now. what would you do? see them as a bro/sis, well then you can throw out marraige out the window right then.

things aren't always as black and white as most kids think these days.>>>

hmmm just dont have any contact with them for a bit. then when your at marriageable age, then get your parents to sort stuff out. (easier said than done)

i think its important to define the word 'relationship' when saying relationship before marriage. you can have areltionship with someone which only involves tlaking. but then if your reltionship involves becoming physical with someone, then this is wrong, and would require pesh.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

ਏਕਾ ਨਾਰੀ ਜਤੀ ਹੋਇ ਪਰ ਨਾਰੀ ਧੀ ਭੈਣ ਵਖਾਣੈ॥

"Having one women as his wife, he (the Sikh) is a celibate and considers any other's wife his daughter or a sister (and vice versa for females)."

(Vaar 6, Pauree 8, Bhai Gurdaas jee)

ਦੇਖਿ ਪਰਾਈਆਂ ਚੰਗੀਆਂ, ਮਾਵਾਂ ਭੈਣਾਂ ਧੀਆਂ ਜਾਣੈ ॥

"Men should look at the opposite sex as mothers, sisters and daughters, women should look at the opposite sex as fathers, brothers and sons."

(Vaar 29, Pauri 11, Bhai Gurdaas jee)

more veechar needs to be done.

i'll start you off, define ਪਰਾਈਆਂ first

something which already belongs to someone?

which suggests that this is in reference to a married person

thus proving me wrong. thankyou

Link to comment
Share on other sites

you can have a reltionship with someone which only involves tlaking. but then if your reltionship involves becoming physical with someone, then this is wrong, and would require pesh.
now you have got it :lol: :TH:

so, relationship in itself is not bad. its just that when we think of one, we tend to think its going to be based on kaam only, which may not be the case.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

you can have a reltionship with someone which only involves tlaking. but then if your reltionship involves becoming physical with someone, then this is wrong, and would require pesh.
now you have got it :) :TH:

so, relationship in itself is not bad. its just that when we think of one, we tend to think its going to be based on kaam only, which may not be the case.

Lol ok teekhya i get your point.

kaam isnt the only bad thing tho, its the only thing we seem to associate with relationships, but attachment is also a factor in relationships.

in an ideal world we would only have a relationship with mahraj.

but for people like me i really need sangat, so its just a case of being sensible. talking and tht is ok up until a point. im just sayin tht too many people go into pyhsical relationships before marriage and this is usually avoided by keeping ur distance until marriage.

anyway the main thing is just keeping close to mahraj and doing ardas, and have faith that mahraj will look after you.

thats enuf from me 2day. :lol:

sorry if i sed nefink outta line.

and KKW penji, talk when necessary :cry:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share


  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt


  • Topics

  • Posts

    • Definitely the Guru Sahibs would be a heavier Scriptures to handle. Dasam Granth is more towards Bir Rass, Guru Gobind Singh showed his Greatness (of course, they would never say this) by separating his own Baania.  And the BIGGEST test of all?? Do we try and read Dasam Granth, Understand n show respect like we do to SGGS? Or... Do we QUESTION it? Guru Gobind Singh Ji is testing us. 
    • My wife will be going for an MRI scan next week but her Kara won’t physically come off.  Is there any way the mri scan can be done with the Kara still on?  The alternative is we will have to try to saw it off before the scan.  
    • was researching this and came back to this thread. Also found an older thread:    
    • Net pay after taxes. If you don't agree, think about this: If you were a trader and started off in China with silk that cost 100 rupees and came to India, and you had to pay total 800 rupees taxes at every small kingdom along the way, and then sold your goods for 1000 rupees, you'd have 100 rupees left, right? If your daswandh is on the gross, that's 100 rupees, meaning you have nothing left. Obviously, you owe only 10% of 100, not 10% of 1000. No, it's 10% before bills and other expenses. These expenses are not your expenses to earn money. They are consumption. If you are a business owner, you take out all expenses, including rent, shop electricity, cost of goods sold, advertising, and government taxes. Whatever is left is your profit and you owe 10% of that.  If you are an employee, you are also entitled to deduct the cost of earning money. That would be government taxes. Everything else is consumption.    
    • No, bro, it's simply not true that no one talks about Simran. Where did you hear that? Swingdon? The entire Sikh world talks about doing Simran, whether it's Maskeen ji, Giani Pinderpal Singh, Giani Kulwant Singh Jawaddi, or Sants. So what are you talking about? Agreed. Agreed. Well, if every bani were exactly the same, then why would Guru ji even write anything after writing Japji Sahib? We should all enjoy all the banis. No, Gurbani tells you to do Simran, but it's not just "the manual". Gurbani itself also has cleansing powers. I'm not saying not to do Simran. Do it. But Gurbani is not merely "the manual". Reading and singing Gurbani is spiritually helpful: ਪ੍ਰਭ ਬਾਣੀ ਸਬਦੁ ਸੁਭਾਖਿਆ ॥  ਗਾਵਹੁ ਸੁਣਹੁ ਪੜਹੁ ਨਿਤ ਭਾਈ ਗੁਰ ਪੂਰੈ ਤੂ ਰਾਖਿਆ ॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥ The Lord's Bani and the words are the best utterances. Ever sing hear and recite them, O brother and the Perfect Guru shall save thee. Pause. p611 Here Guru ji shows the importance of both Bani and Naam: ਆਇਓ ਸੁਨਨ ਪੜਨ ਕਉ ਬਾਣੀ ॥ ਨਾਮੁ ਵਿਸਾਰਿ ਲਗਹਿ ਅਨ ਲਾਲਚਿ ਬਿਰਥਾ ਜਨਮੁ ਪਰਾਣੀ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥ The mortal has come to hear and utter Bani. Forgetting the Name thou attached thyself to other desires. Vain is thy life, O mortal. Pause. p1219 Are there any house manuals that say to read and sing the house manual?
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use