Eyebrows

[*gupt-kaur*]

ok i got a question. how do you tactfully tell someone that what theyre doing is wrong.

we dont want to push them away, we dont want them to feel like we're looking down on them,

so how should it be done??

What is your definition of wrong? To me, eyebrows aren't a big thing, so I wouldn't say anything. If they were doing drugs then of course I would try and tell them to quit.

eyebrows are not a big thing to u?? its removing kes from ur body, changing the way vaheguru has formed us, sikhi has done soo many sacrifices, heads have been removed but taru singh jee didnt let his hair be cut.... kes is very important and removing them is awful,

gurfateh

[Guest peacemaker]

eyebrows are not a big thing to u??

gurfateh

No, some of my friends do it all the time and shave too. Doesn't really bother me either way.

[Jaspaul Singh]

Imagine if we all had friends like Bhai Saahib Taru Singh Jee, we would not have these problems

[xkaurx]

tell ya what though, people saying things like that is what drives people away from sikhi, just because they do something they think everyone else should, not everyones the same and thats what they gota try and understand

awwwwwwwwwwwwww..cho chweeetttt...don't worry, I know its hard to change just one fine morning, but start taking small steps like other have said...and in due course of time you will find that you don't need to do your eyebrows...its wrong to judge, and like I said in a previous message, some of those who may "seem to" be judging you could be in fact trying to help you out...so don't dispose off what they are saying...its all for your own good

now to summarize all that in Punjabi

vaddee aayee eyebrow di lagdi chachi...siddi hundi ki nai?

lolll u sound just like my dad....meh sidhi hojandiiiii gussa na karoo

[*gupt-kaur*]

Imagine if we all had friends like Bhai Saahib Taru Singh Jee, we would not have these problems

hanji veerje, thats true, then again: we shouldnt 4get, if a family member passes away we tend to think of them for some time, because we had a relationship with them, this same way we should never forget all our shaheeds who did soo much for our khalsa. would be gr8 if we all had firends like bhai taru singh jee, but not with the attitude of some ppl 2day, like saying its ok to remove hair etc.... we all should make an effort.

vjkk vjkf

[Mehtab Singh]

some of my friends do it all the time and shave too. Doesn't really bother me either way.

Its all about how and who you define as friends, and how much Sikhi means to you. Also, you didn't mention if these friends of yours are Sikhs or not.

Imagine if we all had friends like Bhai Saahib Taru Singh Jee, we would not have these problems

Veeray we wouldn't be on this forum then, we'd be mega busy japping Naam and reciting Bani 24/7.

lolll u sound just like my dad....meh sidhi hojandiiiii gussa na karoo

naaa mera putt mai ni tetto gussay...tu araam naal siddiiiii ho ja...mera kalgiyaan wala tere te meheraan da meee varsaave...

we shouldnt 4get, if a family member passes away we tend to think of them for some time, because we had a relationship with them, this same way we should never forget all our shaheeds who did soo much for our khalsa.

:WW:

[Guest peacemaker]

Its all about how and who you define as friends, and how much Sikhi means to you. Also, you didn't mention if these friends of yours are Sikhs or not.

Does it really matter if they are Sikh? I decided long ago to not be a hypocrite. I judge my Sikh and Non-Sikh friends equally. If I don't say anything to my Non-Sikh friends for removing their hair, which God has given them too, then why should I say anything to my Sikh friends if they decide to cut their hair? It just doesn't make sense for me to act differently to either side.

hanji veerje, thats true, then again: we shouldnt 4get, if a family member passes away we tend to think of them for some time,

Try whole life.

[Mehtab Singh]

Does it really matter if they are Sikh?

I wouldn't give 2 cents about that, but you need to specify it when you say that they remove their hair and try to put forth the point that it may be alright to do so. If they are Sikhs, and they do it, its upto them, but just because they do it doesn't mean its right or that they are supposed to.

I decided long ago to not be a hypocrite.

Thats good.

I judge my sikh and non sikh friends equally. If I want say anything to my non sikh friends for removie their hair, which God has given them too, then why should I say anything to my sikh friends if they decide to cut their hair?

I said this before as well. Life is defined by what priorities you have. We run behind our major priorities all the time. Depending on their priority in life, their set of friends will be different (even if the friends are non-Sikh), their modes/criteria/levels of judgement will be different, their outlook on life and death, morality and ethics will be different as well. For those who hold Sikhi as a top priority, they would always make sure to tell their "hair-cutting" Sikh friends about the importance of hair. Its pretty simple, if you consider someone your friend, doesn't it make sense to set them right? If your priority is Sikhi, and if they claim to be Sikhs yet don't live/stand upto it, isn't it your moral duty as a friend to pave the way for them?

We can go on and on and sweet talk about how humane it is not to judge people. I agree, it is, but if its all that humane, then none of our Guru Sahibaan would bother redeeming all the sinners that they redeemed. They could have sat back and smiled "Awwww I am not going to judge them", but no, they showed them the right way. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that we are at Gurujee's level, HELL NO! But the least we can do is make someone (who claims to be a Sikh) aware of what Gurujee says and help them to improve themselves in terms of Sikhi, and at the same time slap ourselves in the face and wake up to the fact that we "Amritdharis" need to practice what we preach, thereby helping others and ending up helping out ourselves in the process as well.

[Guest peacemaker]

HAHAHAHA....Listen, dude, I am not talking about Sikh friends in Gurdwara, I am talking about friends that I have from work and some of my old University and High School friends. I have never even spoken about religion to most of them. The only reason I know that they are Sikh is because of their last name and the fact that some of them wear a Kara.

The topic has just never come up. I am talking about for males and females, by the way. So why should I tell them to start keeping their hair? I would not feel it is proper to say that to someone given the environment that I know them from. They will say, "Who the hell are you to say this to me?!", or probably just laugh it off. I don't keep an excel spreadsheet on my computer of all my Sikhs friends and mark off if they are amritdhari, keshdhari or clean shaven. Hell, even with my friends who do keep their hair, I never really mention the fact that they have hair either. So that is why I say it doesn't matter. I am not Father John preaching the gospel.

[Mehtab Singh]

I would not feel it is proper to say that to someone given the environment that I know them from. They will say, "Who the hell are you to say this to me?!", or probably just laugh it off.

That answers my "priority" question. Under your circumstances, I'd agree that its best not to discuss religion with them.

I don't keep an excel spreadsheet on my computer of all my Sikhs friends and mark off if they are amritdhari, keshdhari or clean shaven. Hell, even with my friends who do keep their hair, I never really mention the fact that they have hair either. So that is why I say it doesn't matter. I am not Father John preaching the gospel.

This has been answered already. I made a point about priorities in life and you've answered it. Same applies to this as well. Like you, I wouldn't care as well, but my only concern is not to put forth the logic that "its all good", because is not. A Sikh is not not not (I repeat not) supposed to cut his/her hair...PERIOD! Whether or not you maintain a database makes no difference ( ).