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Is He Cheating On Me?


Guest _need advice_
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Guest _need advice_

Sangat Jio,

I have a dilema.

I am not sure but i think my husband (to be) may be cheating on me.

I cannot be sure 100% and I don't want to make things worse by confronting him but I just need some advice.

He gets a lot of phone calls that he doesnt answer when i'm around him and seems to text all the time around me.

Also, i recently found parts of an email he sent to a girl from a dating site. There was nothing untowards in the email and he doesnt do seva for various Sikh organisation helping Sikh women.

Now inside of me I am sure he is not cheating on me....he is a Gursikh, has high values....but then there is always that little bit of doubt. This email is bugging me and I dont know how to deal with it. The combinations of lots of calls and he doesnt answer them when he is around me and this emial thing has now got me concerarned.

I'm 99% sure he is not doing anything bad (i.e. cheating), but how do I deal with that 1% inside of me that can't sleep at night with worry???

Please give some advice to help me along and it's driving me insane....

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Guest doorknob:)

vjkkvjkf

bhenjee talk to him openly. If he is your soon to be husband you guys should clear any doubts that arise. Tell him your feeling a little worried and just spill it out. He'll tell you the honest truth and you'll feel better :)

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Guest Guest

Talk to him about it otherwise the worry is going to grow, if you have an inkling he might be, unless you are incredibly clingy/paranoid, there is a fair chance your fears are at least partially justified.

Talk to him! A relationship needs good communication.

Although at the same time if he is a Gursikh with high values, and he is not your husband yet, why do you have such a close relationship? Even if you are engaged its generally not considered acceptable to be that close.

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isrIrwgu mhlw 3 ]

sireeraag mehalaa 3 ||

Siree Raag, Third Mehla:

suix suix kwm ghylIey ikAw clih bwh lufwie ]

sun sun kaam gehaeleeeae kiaa chalehi baah luddaae ||

Listen, listen, O soul-bride: you are overtaken by sexual desire-why do you walk like that, swinging your arms in joy?

Awpxw ipru n pCwxhI ikAw muhu dysih jwie ]

aapanaa pir n pashhaanehee kiaa muhu dhaesehi jaae ||

You do not recognize your own Husband Lord! When you go to Him, what face will you show Him?

ijnI sKNØI kMqu pCwixAw hau iqn kY lwgau pwie ]

jinee sakha(n)aee ka(n)th pashhaaniaa ho thin kai laago paae ||

I touch the feet of my sister soul-brides who have known their Husband Lord.

iqn hI jYsI QI rhw sqsMgiq myil imlwie ]1]

thin hee jaisee thhee rehaa sathasa(n)gath mael milaae ||1||

If only I could be like them! Joining the Sat Sangat, the True Congregation, I am united in His Union. ||1||

muMDy kUiV muTI kUiVAwir ]

mu(n)dhhae koorr mut(h)ee koorriaar ||

O woman, the false ones are being cheated by falsehood.

ipru pRBu swcw sohxw pweIAY gur bIcwir ]1] rhwau ]

pir prabh saachaa sohanaa paaeeai gur beechaar ||1|| rehaao ||

God is your Husband; He is Handsome and True. He is obtained by reflecting upon the Guru. ||1||Pause||

mnmuiK kMqu n pCwxeI iqn ikau rYix ivhwie ]

manamukh ka(n)th n pashhaanee thin kio rain vihaae ||

The self-willed manmukhs do not recognize their Husband Lord; how will they spend their life-night?

grib AtIAw iqRsnw jlih duKu pwvih dUjY Bwie ]

garab atteeaa thrisanaa jalehi dhukh paavehi dhoojai bhaae ||

Filled with arrogance, they burn with desire; they suffer in the pain of the love of duality.

sbid rqIAw sohwgxI iqn ivchu haumY jwie ]

sabadh ratheeaa sohaaganee thin vichahu houmai jaae ||

The happy soul-brides are attuned to the Shabad; their egotism is eliminated from within.

sdw ipru rwvih Awpxw iqnw suKy suiK ivhwie ]2]

sadhaa pir raavehi aapanaa thinaa sukhae sukh vihaae ||2||

They enjoy their Husband Lord forever, and their life-night passes in the most blissful peace. ||2||

igAwn ivhUxI ipr muqIAw iprmu n pwieAw jwie ]

giaan vihoonee pir mutheeaa piram n paaeiaa jaae ||

She is utterly lacking in spiritual wisdom; she is abandoned by her Husband Lord. She cannot obtain His Love.

AigAwn mqI AMDyru hY ibnu ipr dyKy BuK n jwie ]

agiaan mathee a(n)dhhaer hai bin pir dhaekhae bhukh n jaae ||

In the darkness of intellectual ignorance, she cannot see her Husband, and her hunger does not depart.

Awvhu imlhu shylIho mY ipru dyhu imlwie ]

aavahu milahu sehaeleeho mai pir dhaehu milaae ||

Come and meet with me, my sister soul-brides, and unite me with my Husband.

pUrY Bwig siqguru imlY ipru pwieAw sic smwie ]3]

poorai bhaag sathigur milai pir paaeiaa sach samaae ||3||

She who meets the True Guru, by perfect good fortune, finds her Husband; she is absorbed in the True One. ||3||

sy shIAw sohwgxI ijn kau ndir kryie ]

sae seheeaa sohaaganee jin ko nadhar karaee ||

Those upon whom He casts His Glance of Grace become His happy soul-brides.

Ksmu pCwxih Awpxw qnu mnu AwgY dyie ]

khasam pashhaanehi aapanaa than man aagai dhaee ||

One who recognizes her Lord and Master places her body and mind in offering before Him.

Gir vru pwieAw Awpxw haumY dUir kryie ]

ghar // paaeiaa aapanaa houmai dhoor karaee ||

Within her own home, she finds her Husband Lord; her egotism is dispelled.

nwnk soBwvMqIAw sohwgxI Anidnu Bgiq kryie ]4]28]61]

naanak sobhaava(n)theeaa sohaaganee anadhin bhagath karaee ||4||28||61||

O Nanak, the happy soul-brides are embellished and exalted; night and day they are absorbed in devotional worship. ||4||28||61||

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hes on a dating site for wat?

u need to confront or somthing cuz u dont want to marry a fool and ruin yourself.

do whatever you can to find out the truth. and if it is tru, pop em inn the head. and who cares if hes a "gursikh".

take his cell phone and read up wat hes up too.

make sure u crack em in the head if its true though!!!!

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VaheGuru Ji Ka Khalsa

VaheGuru Ji Ki Fateh

Why is he on a dating site? Don't make any sense. You could try signing up to this site as an anonymous and start talking to him and see how he responds lol. Joke!

The most rational option is to confront him and talk to him about it in a calm yet firm manner. Though if he really is cheating on you then he may just wriggle himself out of this by making up some long winded story and try to fool you - so keep your wits about you.

You could try taking a Hukamnama - it's amazing how Guru Ji can communicate with you via His Hukamnama. It's been tried and tested and I've found it really does have all the answers you could ever need.

VaheGuru Ji Ka Khalsa

VaheGuru Ji Ki Fateh

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