How To Deal With Alchoholic Fathers

[mann_kaum_layee_qurbaan]

i'm not big on sakhis but here is one from sikhsangat you may like:

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showtopic=36761&hl=

[mskcan]

A very prominent individual doing significant good work in North America once spoke of his 'conversation with God'. He wrote of the interview he had before he came into this world. I would be happy to write the full interview, but for now, it was primarily as such.

God asked: What do you wish to accomplish in the world?

He said: Since there is so much suffering in the world, I wish to help the world heal (he was born shortly after WWII after the deaths of multiple millions and holocausts).

God said: To do so will place a heavy burden upon you.

He said: I accept such a burden

God said: So let it be, and I have the perfect family for you. You will be born of this father. He will be a drunk, and he will abandon you very early on in life. This way you will learn how to be strong and face adversity at a young age. You will be born of this mother, who will be strong and steadfast, and be the unity that holds you and your siblings together. Your father will not have much part to play in your life so that you can do the work that you come into earth to accomplish.

He said: So let it be

And thus, he was born into the world as a cellular particle that was nurtured in a loving mother. He was abandoned by his father, and he was seperated from his mother and brothers at a young age and put into an adoption home. Through the grace and strength of his mother would be be reunited with his family years later. But the lessons he learned, allowed him to become one of the most prominent spiritual leaders of North America today, helping so many millions of people to come out of suffering, lending aid to the orphans of Africa, and so much more.

The question you need to ask yourself is what conversation did you have with God before you came into this earth, what is the purpose that you are meant to fulfill?

[mann_kaum_layee_qurbaan]

waaheguru

[Guru_Da_Chella]

get married and move out of home, if u can?

I dunno sorry i don;t have more advice.

But usually alcoholism is caused by some kind of takleef/problem. Maybe get to the root of the problem if you can?

[Jangal Da]

Sangat Jio,

I wish I could only say fateh and feel proud, Truth be told I'm a Manmukh, And even though I have the thirst for Naam I am lost.

Say Fateh! And be proud. I assume you are a Sikh and we are all a Sangat of learners - never compare yourself to a Mahapurukh etc...You are on a path and Waheguru does not hold a stop-watch to see you through stages.

With regards to your father, from my own experience of alcoholics in the family (I am talking about problem drinking here - dependancy, withdrawal and family dysharmony as a result), the only solution is to force him into a detox programme. Unfortunately the best ones are private inpatient schemes where you pay £3000-6000 per week - but compared to NHS schemes, they deliver results.

Otherwise think of your future - do you want to get married, have children and let them see the upset that you have witnessed or worse? Obviously not, and so my only advice would be to ensure that upon marriage you are financially set up to leave home and settle away from your father.

If you read patth, then Sukhmani Sahib as many have said will settle your concious if your actions merit anxiety.