Jokes Anyone?

[SevaSimranSacrifice]

A husband sitting at home looking at his marriage certificate?

Wife asks: "Wot are you looking fo?"

He replies: "The Expiry date!!!!"

A man comes home and finds his wife dead in the washing machine.

He says, 'Thats ok, as least she died in comfort.'

[Nehmat]

A husband sitting at home looking at his marriage certificate?

Wife asks: "Wot are you looking fo?"

He replies: "The Expiry date!!!!"

lolll....

[AvnitK]

LOL for the first joke lol

[HSD*^]

i would post some jokes but i'd probably end up under moderation for them.

oh wait here's one:

Jaspal was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Waheguru, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to the gurudwara every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up whiskey and bacardi."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Jaspal looked up again and said,

"Never mind. I found one."

[guptveer1469]

i would post some jokes but i'd probably end up under moderation for them.

oh wait here's one:

Jaspal was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Waheguru, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to the gurudwara every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up whiskey and bacardi."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Jaspal looked up again and said,

"Never mind. I found one."

lols good one!

WJKK WJKF

[SevaSimranSacrifice]

HSD that was definately a good one. Made me laugh out loud!!

[jassa]

ek kanjus bania apne bacheyan nu --- ajj rat jo roti nahi khayega ohnu 5 rs millan ge

bache 5 - 5 rs lay ke khushi khushi soo jande aa

next day morning

jehra 5 - 5 rs dayega ossnu hi nashata millega ...

amli sadak te turde hoye rab nu kehnda hai rabba jai ajj menu 100 rs mill jann main 50 rs gurdware chara deyanga ...

kuch der bad ohnu sadak te 50 rs da note gireya hoyea milda hai

ohnu chak ke fer rab nu kehnda hai

"rabba hun enna bhrosa we nahi mere te apne 50 rs pehlan hi rakh laye"

[Nehmat]

i would post some jokes but i'd probably end up under moderation for them.

oh wait here's one:

Jaspal was driving down the street in a sweat because he had an important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up toward heaven, he said "Waheguru, take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to the gurudwara every Sunday for the rest of my life and give up whiskey and bacardi."

Miraculously, a parking place appeared.

Jaspal looked up again and said,

"Never mind. I found one."

lol...

ek kanjus bania apne bacheyan nu --- ajj rat jo roti nahi khayega ohnu 5 rs millan ge

bache 5 - 5 rs lay ke khushi khushi soo jande aa

next day morning

jehra 5 - 5 rs dayega ossnu hi nashata millega ...

ahah! Smarttt

[Nehmat]

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, may I see your license?

Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.

Captain: Whose car is this?

Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card. The driver owned the car.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?

Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.

Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk. Driver: Really? Ain't that something? And I'll bet the lying sucker told you I was speeding, too ...

[SevaSimranSacrifice]

hahahaha!

I like Nehmat!