Jump to content

Disrespect To Turban At Gurdwara Matrimonials From Sikh Females


Guru_Da_Chella
 Share

is there too much hate towards sikh turban in gurdwara matrimonials?  

92 members have voted

  1. 1. is there too much hate towards sikh turban from sikh females in gurdwara matrimonials?

    • yes
    • no
    • possibly
    • I do not know anything about gurdwara matrimonials


Recommended Posts

Guest Jacfsing2
5 hours ago, HarkiranKaur said:

Jhatka is not the only issue in the jatha of which you speak. Issue of strict sarbloh bibek as well. But not all Kaur's who tie a dastaar belong to that jatha. Though all Kaur's from that jatha have to. There are taksali and nihang Kaur's who also tie dastars and even many of us who don't follow any specific jatha at all. 

But the kesh I spoke of was not regular thin skin hairs. Many Kaur's have darker thicker hairs on chin or upper lip. Following Rehet Maryada they can not remove these. Would these same Singh's who complain about women not choosing turban wearing bearded Singh's, have no issue choosing a Kaur with a hint of a moustache or some chin hairs? I think there can be easily a double standard here. I think ALL of be turban tying Singhnis with some facial hairs would have NO issues what so ever with marrying a bearded and turban wearing singh. But will the Singh's choose those Kaurs?

Every human grows Kesh on the body/skin, to some people even that much is not good enough. Also I don't want to say anything negative about any Jatha, but most of the time I naturally associate Keski with that particular Jatha. Some people just don't grow much hair on the face, it usually depends on the testostrome an individual has over the traditional estrogen. Some people don't remove Kesh at all and can still not have lot's of Kesh on the face, what's wrong with those Kaurs? (It's obvious who waxes and threads if you didn't know that.) Also it takes more than wearing or not wearing a Keski for a Rishta if you were wondering that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 21/03/2017 at 11:57 AM, Jacfsing2 said:

Every human grows Kesh on the body/skin, to some people even that much is not good enough. Also I don't want to say anything negative about any Jatha, but most of the time I naturally associate Keski with that particular Jatha. Some people just don't grow much hair on the face, it usually depends on the testostrome an individual has over the traditional estrogen. Some people don't remove Kesh at all and can still not have lot's of Kesh on the face, what's wrong with those Kaurs? (It's obvious who waxes and threads if you didn't know that.) Also it takes more than wearing or not wearing a Keski for a Rishta if you were wondering that.

If the natural rom hair on the skin is an issue I'd suggest then that person needs to stop comparing against girls who do hijamat (muslim and some hindu girls) . PCOS syndrome or insulin resistance can cause hirsutism so it is a bit unfair that guys who are expected to grow  a beard and are criticised for it would do the same against a female who perhaps cannot help being hairier when maintain their kes as directed by rehit.  Besides girls from hot countries generally tend to darker longer vellus hair which is more noticeable on fair skin most Punjabis case (Pakistanis probably wax it off  if you compare)

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Jacfsing2
44 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

If the natural rom hair on the skin is an issue I'd suggest then that person needs to stop comparing against girls who do hijamat (muslim and some hindu girls) . PCOS syndrome or insulin resistance can cause hirsutism so it is a bit unfair that guys who are expected to grow  a beard and are criticised for it would do the same against a female who perhaps cannot help being hairier when maintain their kes as directed by rehit.  Besides girls from hot countries generally tend to darker longer vellus hair which is more noticeable on fair skin most Punjabis case (Pakistanis probably wax it off  if you compare)

I know this is an unfair standard for Kesh, but most people who keep facial hair but still don't keep body hair just looks like Pakhand, (an example of this is Harnaam Kaur, who clearly waxes but keeps hair on the face). So I do give higher respect to people who respect all Kesh instead of picking and choosing which Kesh is important and which is not. (I haven't mentioned any negativity towards Rom Kesh.) Also just cause a girl doesn't have a full-out beard doesn't mean she's waxing or threading, some people naturally grow less Kesh. (Most men can grow more Kesh than me on the body and face than I can, and other men couldn't grow long Kesh even if they tried). But yes, if you keep a certain hair, but remove hair elsewhere, you will be shown to me as a Pakhandi if you are trying to make Guru Sahib proud, you wouldn't. But if a woman or man removed Kesh before Chacking Amrit or desiring to be a Sikh, I wouldn't hold that against them, I myself was a Mona once: so I shouldn't hold some impossible standard, that I myself was imperfect from.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest Jacfsing2
8 hours ago, HarkiranKaur said:

All I know is I think a fully bearded turbaned Singh looks much more distinguished and stands out than a guy who shaves and looks like a child. I would not have married a clean shaven Singh (aside from the fact that I have taken Amrit).  But even still I just find them more attractive in natural form. As for tied or flowing dhari that's a different conversation. Either is fine to me as long as they don't pluck or trim etc. Just like I comb my eyebrows but don't pluck. You can still do basic hygiene and care and you can still shape eyebrows that are natural by an eyebrow brush so they look neat. No need to pluck. Same for a beard. (Luckily I don't have hirsutism like some women but if I did I'd expect my husband to respect me just the same. )

So all you clean shaven Singh's consider growing your beards. Don't be worried that you won't find someone. Almost every Singh here in Kashmir keeps their kesh and ties turban and I'd say 99% of the Sikh population in Kashmir are Amritdhari. None have issues finding a wife :) 

Not sure if you understand how Subcontinental people find spouses, or even generic Amritdharis finding spouses, but most people usually marry with someone their family has contact with, or they have direct/indirect contact with the person they want a Rishta with. Usually Amritdharis if their parents aren't Amritdharis marry within their social crew, instead of going all the way to Kashmir to find someone, and even if they do go into the Subcontinent, they will find someone from where their family is from, (Punjab, Delhi, anywhere else).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

52 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I know this is an unfair standard for Kesh, but most people who keep facial hair but still don't keep body hair just looks like Pakhand, (an example of this is Harnaam Kaur, who clearly waxes but keeps hair on the face). So I do give higher respect to people who respect all Kesh instead of picking and choosing which Kesh is important and which is not. (I haven't mentioned any negativity towards Rom Kesh.) Also just cause a girl doesn't have a full-out beard doesn't mean she's waxing or threading, some people naturally grow less Kesh. (Most men can grow more Kesh than me on the body and face than I can, and other men couldn't grow long Kesh even if they tried). But yes, if you keep a certain hair, but remove hair elsewhere, you will be shown to me as a Pakhandi if you are trying to make Guru Sahib proud, you wouldn't. But if a woman or man removed Kesh before Chacking Amrit or desiring to be a Sikh, I wouldn't hold that against them, I myself was a Mona once: so I shouldn't hold some impossible standard, that I myself was imperfect from.

Harnaam does a lot which is not right for a sikh woman but I agree it is mental to insist on your beard and then remove the other kesh . It's probably now her only ticket to fame , sad. I respect Baljit Kaur more she's kept her sikhi and integrity. 

My Mum and a lot of ladies in her gen were not sporting any major facial growth but after hitting menopause and the whole androgen increase that has changed but it's kind of accepted that is going to happen . It's much harder for girls and women  , I suspect it's the increased ingested oestrogen in dairy being converted to androgens because of the increase over the decades with changes in  dairy production practices (heavier reliance on meds and hormones) .

Ultimately it's up to the individual .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
 Share


  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt
  • advertisement_alt


  • Topics

  • Posts

    • lol dal panth Panj told me explicitly not to associate with Vadhbhag Singh Sodhi followers!
    • We have lamp (or Jyot) the pure unscented candle for a reason. Traditionally, Patis used candle light (jyot), so they could read SGGS in darkness. Light, elec didn't exist. Dhoop is used to attract the "Good spirits" but also keep freshness where Maharaj will be.  Interestingly and coincidentally I heard Sakhi a few dsys ago. During Dasa Pitha's time these souls were roaming the Earth and even Sangat noticed. Maharaj asked them "y u here?" They replied during recitation of SGGS and making Degh they didn't bother lighting candle. THAT WAS THEE ONLY REASON NO GATI WAS GIVEN TO THEM!!!  AUTHENTICITY NOT CHECKED I heard once on YT like 2 days ago.  If u apply dhoop in one room of your house twice a week u will notice a difference esp in the smell and freshness of that room. 
    • Sangat ji, With the hot weather as per Guru's Hukm, how can we look after our kes?  First of all the beard! Working in Construction, factory and any other heated environment I UNDERSTAND! At my workplace it's over 32 degree celcius and sometimes we have to lift 20kg ALL! DAY! My tips, regularly shampoo the beard during ishnan. APPLY OIL! The technique of applying oil is by rubbing it thoroughly in the roots. Pay attention to the noise esp on the chin. You will hear this "crosh crosh" noise. Keep rubbing oil until u can't hear it no more! This means the oil has blended in properly.  Second tip on beard, keep an extra kanga in your pocket. Every two, three hours give your beard a proper comb down to get rid of any sweat or stickiness. SECOND BENEFIT! Do this all 12 months every single day your beard will look like it's been professionally groomed. TRY IT! People will ask you "What gel u use? How can yer beard be naturally like that?" You can say all I use is coconut oil or whaeva oil but just comb the beard every 2-3 hours for a minute.  As for the kes, morning time get rid of all the gronjra (or knots - forgotten English word), in the morning. However, during evening comb down make sure you get rid of small remaining gronjra and comb yer hair nice and straight. You will feel soooo so relaxed. Yes our hair will go unnoticed due to Dastar, but our hair demands time and self grooming!So proper combing down, spending a good 15-20 mins most evenings is an absolute MUST!  Most evenings I let my hair down and cover hair with my parna for 2-3 hours so it gets to relax from the tying up.  FINAL TIP! We are Sikhs so we keep fighting and remember this! The tradition of Dastar and uncut hair started in India, where the weather is twice as hot. Everytime we bring this thought in the mind, Guru ji will bless us and make us feel cooled down by a notch.  Fateh.       
    • Been so much nindya and attacking Shastarvidiya since the 2000s, however if we look at gatka now it's still mostly as poor and poorly taught as it was back then, still morris dancing moves and still behzti moves in BBC shows about sikhi and vaisakhi. If people were going to attack shastarvidiya, wouldn't have made sense to improve gatka instead and make it more effective? Additionally, the Nihang Singh presence has improved greatly now, and the cracks within the the SGPC and affiliated jatha jathebandis are showing more greatly as panth becomes more knowledgable with dasam bani and itihas day-by-day, so much gyaan which was lost within panjabi sikhs during colonial times. In the 2000s, the groups were able to talk down this bani and  gyaan by associating it with  RSS and hindus, brahminwaad etc. Not working so well now is it? However with gyaan it would be also good for us to try and preserve our martial arts and keertan vidiya as well! More and more crazy keertan videos are coming out from jatha members that are being made fun of and making sangat annoyed and upset, on tiktok and instagram reels.  
    • Author Posted April 24   On 4/21/2025 at 2:43 PM, ipledgeblue said: sirr should not be nanga because keski is usually worn.   Sikhs can sleep nanga-sirr if they choose to . Being from Punjab, almost every Sardaarji i know (amritdhari or not) sleeps/showers with their hair uncovered. I don't think Guru Sahib asked us to wear Dastar to sleep and I don't think it is in SRM.   The idea of "keski being worn to sleep" is cos in Bollywood films (Bachna Ae Haseeno) Sikh characters usually tie a gol parna when sleeping since the actor's usually Hindu. So they gotta cover his head somehow or he'd have cut hair. Same reason Diljit wore a pagg to bed in the El Sueno vid. Only time they didn't do that was in Gadar with Sunny Deol which just looked odd tbh   What in the world? What sikh or even a decent human would base their knowledge of their culture or religion on a movie industry, that too Bollywood?  Believe me, no sikh ever said, I must cover my head becasue an actor did so in a movie. I've been doing it all wrong, I must start covering mh head because the sikh in that movie did.  Just because every panjabi and sardaar you know, does something, also doesn't make it right..  Follow the guru. And if you have a medical condition, then exemptions can be made.  Just admit it, because of my medical condition, I am not able to follow this rehit. Why are you getting everyone else to drop to your level?
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use