Sikh Channel TV Grooming show 7pm 16th sept.

[GuestKaur2]

VJKK VJKF

2 minutes ago, mahandulai said:

@jkvlondon @puzzled would you agree that, our girls need to smarten up, as someone said, the victims are also partly to blame?

Yes, however it may not always be their fault but sometimes our girls can be a bit silly.

[GuestKaur2]

VJKK VJKF

The way that we can tackle this issue is by spreading more parchaar about Sikhi and raising awareness about these sorts of topics. If our girls have more faith in Sikhi then they would have a bit more common sense rather than to walk off with a random stranger. The problem is that in the western world dating is such a normal thing whereas in Sikhi the concept of dating does not exist. These groomers set up accounts on dating websites/social media and our girls are clueless enough to fall right into their trap. We cannot just blame the groomers and the victims but it is also up to us, to educate and spread knowledge amongst youth. We have resources like social media that we can use to our advantage to prevent issues like this from happening in the first place. So answering @mahandulai veerji's question, yes it is the victims fault and the groomers fault and ours since the older generation have not really done a good job of spreading the wisdom of Sikhi. If we did a better job, we could prevent most incidents and if we were more stricter with children and at the very least took them to the gurdwara more often, it could contribute to the betterment of our community. Just my twopence worth.

Bhull Chuk Maaf

VJKK VJKF

[jkvlondon]

1 hour ago, mahandulai said:

@jkvlondon @puzzled would you agree that, our girls need to smarten up, as someone said, the victims are also partly to blame?

given that they start on our girls from a primary school age(7,, 8,9) , it is very hard to blame such kids for the lack of streetsmarts especially when they are essentially protected from the unsavoury side of life : no one at home warns them, no one talks about how they appreciate their daughters/sons, no teaches sikh history, no one talks about gurbani or listens to  kirtan, no one talks about being careful of muslim girls (yes this is an important and new way they approach girls via their female friends) , sex talks are a must, as are what to do if they feel unsafe on the street when walking home from school.

Parents do NOT have the luxury of sharam : chaitropakhyan  is the warning tradition we should have been giving our youth .

 

[GuestKaur2]

VJKK VJKF

5 minutes ago, jkvlondon said:

given that they start on our girls from a primary school age(7,, 8,9) , it is very hard to blame such kids for the lack of streetsmarts especially when they are essentially protected from the unsavoury side of life : no one at home warns them, no one talks about how they appreciate their daughters/sons, no teaches sikh history, no one talks about gurbani or listens to  kirtan, no one talks about being careful of muslim girls (yes this is an important and new way they approach girls via their female friends) , sex talks are a must, as are what to do if they feel unsafe on the street when walking home from school.

Parents do NOT have the luxury of sharam : chaitropakhyan  is the warning tradition we should have been giving our youth .

I agree with penji, it is also our responsibility. Not just the child's.

VJKK VJKF

 

[puzzled]

3 hours ago, mahandulai said:

@jkvlondon @puzzled would you agree that, our girls need to smarten up, as someone said, the victims are also partly to blame?

Well the question is why are Sikh women easy targets? If we try to get into the groomers mind, what do they think of Sikh women? what makes them think Sikh women are easy targets? and why are they such easy targets.

They say the groomers give them money, clothes, jewelry, well why do Sikh women get easily infatuated with some cash thrown at them?

Many Sikh women have their drinks spiked in clubs and then end up getting raped, question is What is a semi naked Sikh woman doing in a club with drinks in the first place?   obviously in todays time in this country there is absolutely nothing wrong with women being semi naked and getting drunk in clubs but is that Ok for someone who calls herself a Sikh? 

In same cases Sikh women end up getting black mailed after having one night stands. They have casual sex and then next minute guys start black mailing them, there have been many of these cases at universities. 

At my school Sikhs were a tiny minority but the few Sikh females there were they used to smoke out side school gates, sneak alcohol into school etc   one Punjabi girl made a video of herself sticking a toilet brush up her private parts in the school toilets, and then sent it to Paki boys from another school, she then was bullied.

There was another case of a Punjabi girl in our school who was going out with a paki, he then started saying to her that if she doesn't send him a selfie of her breast he's then gnna tell her parents that shes with a paki, so she took a pic of her breast and sent it to him and then next minute everyone had it on their phones, even i saw it!     She didn't learn and few years later was engaged to a Pakistani 

If you take these things into perspective then you can get an idea of why people from other communities see Punjabi women as "easy" 

Yes many innocent girls get groomed but many get groomed because they behave like trash in the first place and become easier to take advantage off ...

I feel sorry for them, its terrible what they go through, but i aint gnna defend trashy behavior ...

[jkvlondon]

1 hour ago, puzzled said:

Well the question is why are Sikh women easy targets? If we try to get into the groomers mind, what do they think of Sikh women? what makes them think Sikh women are easy targets? and why are they such easy targets.

They say the groomers give them money, clothes, jewelry, well why do Sikh women get easily infatuated with some cash thrown at them?

Many Sikh women have their drinks spiked in clubs and then end up getting raped, question is What is a semi naked Sikh woman doing in a club with drinks in the first place?   obviously in todays time in this country there is absolutely nothing wrong with women being semi naked and getting drunk in clubs but is that Ok for someone who calls herself a Sikh? 

In same cases Sikh women end up getting black mailed after having one night stands. They have casual sex and then next minute guys start black mailing them, there have been many of these cases at universities. 

At my school Sikhs were a tiny minority but the few Sikh females there were they used to smoke out side school gates, sneak alcohol into school etc   one Punjabi girl made a video of herself sticking a toilet brush up her private parts in the school toilets, and then sent it to Paki boys from another school, she then was bullied.

There was another case of a Punjabi girl in our school who was going out with a paki, he then started saying to her that if she doesn't send him a selfie of her breast he's then gnna tell her parents that shes with a paki, so she took a pic of her breast and sent it to him and then next minute everyone had it on their phones, even i saw it!     She didn't learn and few years later was engaged to a Pakistani 

If you take these things into perspective then you can get an idea of why people from other communities see Punjabi women as "easy" 

Yes many innocent girls get groomed but many get groomed because they behave like trash in the first place and become easier to take advantage off ...

I feel sorry for them, its terrible what they go through, but i aint gnna defend trashy behavior ...

a child is hardly a mature adult to discern the nuances of human behaviour or even to imagine the worst of humans' depravity .

Strong self-identity in sikhi will counter any pull towards joining in going to clubs just to fit in , even if the parents are total losers and fail to inform about safety. However even in the case of an amritdhari girl who got spiked she was pressurised by female 'friends' of hindu and sikh origin to come out ..

We really need to make it clear that going clubbing isn't our thing , and there's no great thing in behaving like a slapper or dressing like one . That being blackmailed can only happen  if you don't live truthfully . if you are scared of your folks then you know everything you are doing is wrong . If you made the first mistake then tell your folks before all and sundry are blackmailing you into being their toy .

Have self-respect and be discerning about who you hang around with , if you hang around the rubbish except the filth to get onto you too.

Parents need to make sure their girls understand they are loved and that they are equal to their male siblings and cousins in their eyes , that will help them from seeking love and approval outside the family . Educate them about how to cut down romeos to size if they are showing unwanted attention and self-defence classes are a must.  If you know a family that has messed up parents look after their kids as your own, keep an eye on them .

Sunny Leone's mum was an alchy and her father was indifferent to the home situation  , although the kids were taken to gurdwara nothing stuck so they became coconuts, that is why she thought nothing of making money the way she did . BECOMING COCONUTS is the main problem - losing self-identity as strong sikh female .

[puzzled]

1 hour ago, jkvlondon said:

a child is hardly a mature adult to discern the nuances of human behaviour or even to imagine the worst of humans' depravity .

Strong self-identity in sikhi will counter any pull towards joining in going to clubs just to fit in , even if the parents are total losers and fail to inform about safety. However even in the case of an amritdhari girl who got spiked she was pressurised by female 'friends' of hindu and sikh origin to come out ..

We really need to make it clear that going clubbing isn't our thing , and there's no great thing in behaving like a slapper or dressing like one . That being blackmailed can only happen  if you don't live truthfully . if you are scared of your folks then you know everything you are doing is wrong . If you made the first mistake then tell your folks before all and sundry are blackmailing you into being their toy .

Have self-respect and be discerning about who you hang around with , if you hang around the rubbish except the filth to get onto you too.

Parents need to make sure their girls understand they are loved and that they are equal to their male siblings and cousins in their eyes , that will help them from seeking love and approval outside the family . Educate them about how to cut down romeos to size if they are showing unwanted attention and self-defence classes are a must.  If you know a family that has messed up parents look after their kids as your own, keep an eye on them .

Sunny Leone's mum was an alchy and her father was indifferent to the home situation  , although the kids were taken to gurdwara nothing stuck so they became coconuts, that is why she thought nothing of making money the way she did . BECOMING COCONUTS is the main problem - losing self-identity as strong sikh female .

Well that's the thing if you behave like a slapper then your gnna get treated like a slapper! but obviously in todays politically correct society you can't say things like that, but its the truth.  Obviously many innocent girls who are ignorant to what guys are capable of doing end up getting taken advantage off, thats different. If you dress like a tart, get drunk, have casual sex, then why are you surprised when someone treats you like crap and takes advantage! why do they do this in the first place? and then people wounder why punjabi women are considered "easy going"    Some self respect and discipline can take you a long way 

 

 

[puzzled]

doesn't guru granth sahib ji say that you should dress in a way so that no one looks at you in a wrong way or attract wrong attention?    Why is covering your head only reserved for the gurdwara? whats the point flinging it off the second you walk out?  what religious identity does the average Punjabi girl have? nothing   

arent Sikhs supposed to respect their hair/identity and always keep it in a joora ? why don't we see this in your average Punjabi females anymore? isnt this basic stuff 

[Not2Cool2Argue]

16 hours ago, puzzled said:

doesn't guru granth sahib ji say that you should dress in a way so that no one looks at you in a wrong way or attract wrong attention?    Why is covering your head only reserved for the gurdwara? whats the point flinging it off the second you walk out?  what religious identity does the average Punjabi girl have? nothing   

arent Sikhs supposed to respect their hair/identity and always keep it in a joora ? why don't we see this in your average Punjabi females anymore? isnt this basic stuff 

I think all this happened when sikhi got split into sehajdharis and amritdharis. Before everyone would take amrit before their anand karaj and so kept rehit when young. Like learning japji sahib, not eating out, not cutting hair.

It was basically part of our culture. Like covering ur hair, not talking to opposite gender, and not doing drugs. 

In the west, most punjabis have kept the bad punjabi culture like bhangra and alcohol and treating men better than women and got rid of all the sikhi related culture because they think its only for amritdharis. And as preachers and babas became more strict, the general sikh population has become lax. 

I think in our gurudwaras we need to start teaching the basics. Like to be a sikh means to be a good person and to at least do japji sahib daily and to learn panjabi and no dating until u r ready to get married.Then later on we can talk about keeping ur hair, the importance of dasam granth,  of shaasters of 1984, of SRM. I think basics of sikhi was kind of doing this. They were getting thru to the lay panjabi person. Who just want a spiritual sikhi without all the rules..

[puzzled]

@Not2Cool2Argue  Thats some interesting points, i am non amritdhari and come from a non amritdhari family and growing up i got the impression that we don't have to be religious and that religious stuff is only for amritdharis, Its a shame but i think that how a lot pf Punjabi kids are raised

many Punjabi parents don'r cut their sons hair and tie patkas from a small age but why don't they do the same with their daughters? why does your average Punjabi parent only reserve uncut hair and head covered for their sons...   i live near a khalsa primary school and you see countless little boys with guttis and patkas but not a single little girl. Parents deny their daughters any sort of identity from birth