Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
Guest Kaur

Amritdhari family doesn’t like my boyfriend

Recommended Posts

Guest Kaur

I am a 20 yr old girl in US with a amritdhaari family who is very religious and respected. I fell in love with a guy who is mona, eat meat and drinks. I was never as religious as my parents but do value being a vegetarian and sikhi values. We were together for a year and half and Bc I thought I was going to spend my whole life with him we were intimate. I got pregnant and we went to many doctors appointments Bc we were going to have twins. I misscarried one baby and the other we had an abortion Bc my parents hated him and I never wanted to be a disgrace for my family. My parents explained to me so much to leave him but I can’t. I didn’t tell them anything about the pregnancy Bc I’m unsure of their reaction and how they will lose the little respect they have for me. I’m lying to them again that I’m not talking to him when I am. I don’t want to chose between my family and my boyfriend, who I was going to have babies with. I feel so guilty and depressed everyday I hate myself and think I should’ve kept the baby no matter what. I have no guidance or advice Bc I’m ashamed of my actions and can’t tell anyone. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am wondering your parents are so nice who are still talking to you. Being in US doesn’t mean modern and western like the way you are. 

I am sad to know how your amritdhari parents feel. 🙏

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Truth

 

and I will just bang my head against the wall again. What a [MOD DELETED] mess these youngsters are....can't the [ ] parents teach them the real values of right and wrong?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Khalsa Raj

By the sounds of it you've chosen your bf over your family already. Your bad karams mean you have not learned from your amritdhari parvaar and have gone against everything Sikhi teaches. What help are you after now this far into a car crash of a life. Why are you ashamed you made conscious decisions, he didn't force anything upon you. Either the parents didn't try hard enough to instil Sikhi values without shoving them down your throat or you're simply a rebellious spoilt brat who has no concern of the parents wellbeing, won't be the first certainly not the last.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest jigsaw_puzzled_singh
On 1/24/2019 at 2:30 PM, Guest Kaur said:

 I’m ashamed of my actions and can’t tell anyone. 

......apart from the 7.53 billion that you've just told now by broadcasting it to the entire world. But, it's an easy mistake to make. I mean 2 people on one hand and 7.53 billion in the other. The numbers are so similar it's easy to confuse the two.

 

Quote

I am wondering your parents are so nice who are still talking to you. Being in US doesn’t mean modern and western like the way you are.

Hark Kaur. Jasmine Sandlas, the bombshell bandit to name but three. It's a real phenonema. If you look at the Punjabi diaspora around the world you will notice that the 3rd and 4th generation western born are relatively traditional but the new 1st and 2nd generation lot are not very good at balancing east and west primarily because they don't understand the blood, sweat and tears that it took to establish the diaspora. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 hours ago, Guest Khalsa Raj said:

By the sounds of it you've chosen your bf over your family already. Your bad karams mean you have not learned from your amritdhari parvaar and have gone against everything Sikhi teaches. What help are you after now this far into a car crash of a life. Why are you ashamed you made conscious decisions, he didn't force anything upon you. Either the parents didn't try hard enough to instil Sikhi values without shoving them down your throat or you're simply a rebellious spoilt brat who has no concern of the parents wellbeing, won't be the first certainly not the last.

is your BF okay with your religious values ?

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Kaum is near end

You were lucky enough to be raised by a family, that too amritdhari gursikh.

yet you chose to do what you did.

people like you are the problem. Simple as. 

Looks like Bollywood lifestyle didn’t work out for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's not a question. You should just stick with that man, rather than ruining some other guys life. 

  • Haha 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, puzzled said:

That's not a question. You should just stick with that man, rather than ruining some other guys life. 

Thats what I wanted to comment earlier but couldn’t able to put into sentence.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Amit12 said:

is your BF okay with your religious values ?

 

🤣

When did getting knocked up by the bf become a religious value 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 1/24/2019 at 6:30 AM, Guest Kaur said:

I am a 20 yr old girl in US with a amritdhaari family who is very religious and respected. 

You are 20 years old and you have created a mess of your life.  You made a mess of your life over a boyfriend.   Once you go to college or university there will be more boys like your boyfriend who will feed you the same lines so they can....well you know what they want, it's always on their mind.  Also you boyfriend will discover there are a whole lot of girls in college that he will want to be with.  Sooner or later you will be in his past.  

What you need to do is start reading Gurbani in which ever language you will be able to understand what is being said by the Guru.  It's always good to understand the other sides point of view before jumping into something that will change the course of your life.  The other side being Sikhi.  Search in Google for Sri Guru Granth Sahib ji and start reading.  Life is too short to be wasted on poor decisions.  

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 1/24/2019 at 2:30 PM, Guest Kaur said:

I am a 20 yr old girl in US with a amritdhaari family who is very religious and respected. I fell in love with a guy who is mona, eat meat and drinks. I was never as religious as my parents but do value being a vegetarian and sikhi values. We were together for a year and half and Bc I thought I was going to spend my whole life with him we were intimate. I got pregnant and we went to many doctors appointments Bc we were going to have twins. I misscarried one baby and the other we had an abortion Bc my parents hated him and I never wanted to be a disgrace for my family. My parents explained to me so much to leave him but I can’t. I didn’t tell them anything about the pregnancy Bc I’m unsure of their reaction and how they will lose the little respect they have for me. I’m lying to them again that I’m not talking to him when I am. I don’t want to chose between my family and my boyfriend, who I was going to have babies with. I feel so guilty and depressed everyday I hate myself and think I should’ve kept the baby no matter what. I have no guidance or advice Bc I’m ashamed of my actions and can’t tell anyone. 

Remember that no matter how massive your Paaps are, Guru Sahib is the ocean of virtues and always willing to forgive. But now you have to give your head to your Guru because you have done a Bajjar Kurhet and get a Tankah (punishment like some amount of Seva etc for forgiveness). Go to the Panj Pyare and they can help (it may take some time to find them) and do an Ardas in front of Maharaaj with your full heart and take a Hukamnama. The Shabad that comes up is the message from the Guru to you and will guide you. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, RajKaregaKhalsa1 said:

Remember that no matter how massive your Paaps are, Guru Sahib is the ocean of virtues and always willing to forgive. But now you have to give your head to your Guru because you have done a Bajjar Kurhet and get a Tankah (punishment like some amount of Seva etc for forgiveness). Go to the Panj Pyare and they can help (it may take some time to find them) and do an Ardas in front of Maharaaj with your full heart and take a Hukamnama. The Shabad that comes up is the message from the Guru to you and will guide you. 

I dont think she is an amritdhari so she wouldn't be going to Punj pyare for her mistakes. Her family is amritdhari.  However punj pyare also can help her.  They can direct her on the right path.  The punj pyare are not only their to give amrit.  And they are not so scary looking as some make them out to be.  She can simply go to them and say she is face some issues.  And needs advice on how to go about it in life.  No specific are needed.  They can understand from a bit of info what is going on and direct the person in the right direction.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 minutes ago, Akalifauj said:

I dont think she is an amritdhari so she wouldn't be going to Punj pyare for her mistakes. Her family is amritdhari.  However punj pyare also can help her.  They can direct her on the right path.  The punj pyare are not only their to give amrit.  And they are not so scary looking as some make them out to be.  She can simply go to them and say she is face some issues.  And needs advice on how to go about it in life.  No specific are needed.  They can understand from a bit of info what is going on and direct the person in the right direction.

Yeah Panj Pyare are here to help us. Bajjar Kurhets still apply to Sehaj-dhari Sikhs too don't they?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, RajKaregaKhalsa1 said:

Yeah Panj Pyare are here to help us. Bajjar Kurhets still apply to Sehaj-dhari Sikhs too don't they?

I dont think so, but if they do, prepare for a line up that is the length of russia.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
Sign in to follow this  



×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use