Listening To Prayers,when In Bed With Husband/wife

[Pheena 1]

how is kissing or hugging going to improve ur sikhi jeevan i wonder??

and dont give me the usual of, "oh its just love, were sposed to love evry one"

the only true love is for maharaaj and all of our actions cud from this love

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For one dear sis, they are married. Is marriage only a license to make babies? Should there be no Love between 2 individuals? or do you suppose they should live in seperate rooms?

[Surd_r_cute 0]

I dont whether to laugh or laugh alot. ( sorry could not help).

I dont which guruji's sakhi is this, Once a muslim fakir asked guru sahib, what kind of fakir are you ? you wear good clothes, you have money, you are married, and you have children.

He replied, istri iman , lakshmii gujran, aulad nishan.

it means wife so that i dont lust, money so that i don't need to beg. Children to maintain life, if we have no children than life will come to end.

There is Zen saying, When you walk, you walk, when talk, you talk, when you eat you eat never wobble, i.e. whetever you do in life do it with an honesty , commitement , dont think about anything else.

As long when you kiss your husband you don't think about any other guy or gal in your head you are not cheating nor doing anything wrong.

Anothe zen story, once there were two monks walking in jungle and as they are bout to cross river they see a young gal , one monk takes the gal and puts her on his shoulder and crosses the river, second one is offended i.e as a monk he touched a young gal. 8 hours later when they reach their monastery second monks tells his friend why did you lift the gal, fist one replies, i left her 8 hours ago on river bank, so why are you still carrying her.

once an old man went a doctor very tired , doctor does his checkup and says your Blood Pressure is high. Old man replies may be it is sex. Doctor says reduce your sex by 50%, Old man says what should i reduce , thinking or looking.

Sikhism is a special religon but you are not Mother Mary i.e. have a child without get intimate with your husband( i dont think people here would like me to use three letter S word so instead i used intimate) . So dont feel guilty .Just dont let it rule your mind.

[proud_to_be_singhni 5]

vahe-guru

(intimateness + with bani playing = beadbi)

These hugs etc is attatchment...extra pleasure ....apart from the natural making of a family through a householders (gristhees) jeevan. Emotional attatchment can take a person further from Guru Sahib ji.

This Shabad is by Guru Amar Daas Ji in Raag Maajh on Pannaa 129

mwJ mhlw 3 ]

maajh mehalaa 3 ||

Maajh, Third Mehl:

mwieAw mohu jgqu sbwieAw ]

maaeiaa mohu jagath sabaaeiaa ||

The whole world is engrossed in emotional attachment to Maya.

qRY gux dIsih mohy mwieAw ]

thrai gun dheesehi mohae maaeiaa ||

Those who are controlled by the three qualities are attached to Maya.

gur prswdI ko ivrlw bUJY cauQY pid ilv lwvixAw ]1]

gur parasaadhee ko viralaa boojhai chouthhai padh liv laavaniaa ||1||

By Guru's Grace, a few come to understand; they center their consciousness in the fourth state. ||1||

hau vwrI jIau vwrI mwieAw mohu sbid jlwvixAw ]

ho vaaree jeeo vaaree maaeiaa mohu sabadh jalaavaniaa ||

I am a sacrifice, my soul is a sacrifice, to those who burn away their emotional attachment to Maya, through the Shabad.

mwieAw mohu jlwey so hir isau icqu lwey hir dir mhlI soBw pwvixAw ]1] rhwau ]

maaeiaa mohu jalaaeae so har sio chith laaeae har dhar mehalee sobhaa paavaniaa ||1|| rehaao ||

Those who burn away this attachment to Maya, and focus their consciousness on the Lord are honored in the True Court, and the Mansion of the Lord's Presence. ||1||Pause||

dyvI dyvw mUlu hY mwieAw ]

dhaevee dhaevaa mool hai maaeiaa ||

The source, the root, of the gods and goddesses is Maya.

isMimRiq swsq ijMin aupwieAw ]

si(n)mrith saasath ji(n)n oupaaeiaa ||

For them, the Simritees and the Shaastras were composed.

kwmu k®oDu psirAw sMswry Awie jwie duKu pwvixAw ]2]

kaam krodhh pasariaa sa(n)saarae aae jaae dhukh paavaniaa ||2||

Sexual desire and anger are diffused throughout the universe. Coming and going, people suffer in pain. ||2||

iqsu ivic igAwn rqnu ieku pwieAw ]

this vich giaan rathan eik paaeiaa ||

The jewel of spiritual wisdom was placed within the universe.

gur prswdI mMin vswieAw ]

gur parasaadhee ma(n)n vasaaeiaa ||

By Guru's Grace, it is enshrined within the mind.

jqu squ sMjmu scu kmwvY guir pUrY nwmu iDAwvixAw ]3]

jath sath sa(n)jam sach kamaavai gur poorai naam dhhiaavaniaa ||3||

Celibacy, chastity, self-discipline and the practice of truthfulness are obtained from the Perfect Guru, by meditating on the Naam, the Name of the Lord. ||3||

pyeIAVY Dn Brim BulwxI ]

paeeearrai dhhan bharam bhulaanee ||

In this world of her parents' home, the soul-bride has been deluded by doubt.

dUjY lwgI iPir pCoqwxI ]

dhoojai laagee fir pashhothaanee ||

Attached to duality, she later comes to regret it.

hlqu plqu dovY gvwey supnY suKu n pwvixAw ]4]

halath palath dhovai gavaaeae supanai sukh n paavaniaa ||4||

She forfeits both this world and the next, and even in her dreams, she does not find peace. ||4||

pyeIAVY Dn kMqu smwly ]

paeeearrai dhhan ka(n)th samaalae ||

The soul-bride who remembers her Husband Lord in this world,

gur prswdI vyKY nwly ]

gur parasaadhee vaekhai naalae ||

by Guru's Grace, sees Him close at hand.

ipr kY shij rhY rMig rwqI sbid isMgwru bxwvixAw ]5]

pir kai sehaj rehai ra(n)g raathee sabadh si(n)gaar banaavaniaa ||5||

She remains intuitively attuned to the Love of her Beloved; she makes the Word of His Shabad her decoration. ||5||

sPlu jnmu ijnw siqguru pwieAw ]

safal janam jinaa sathigur paaeiaa ||

Blessed and fruitful is the coming of those who find the True Guru;

dUjw Bwau gur sbid jlwieAw ]

dhoojaa bhaao gur sabadh jalaaeiaa ||

through the Word of the Guru's Shabad, they burn their love of duality.

eyko riv rihAw Gt AMqir imil sqsMgiq hir gux gwvixAw ]6]

eaeko rav rehiaa ghatt a(n)thar mil sathasa(n)gath har gun gaavaniaa ||6||

The One Lord is permeating and pervading deep within the heart. Joining the Sat Sangat, the True Congregation, they sing the Glorious Praises of the Lord. ||6||

siqguru n syvy so kwhy AwieAw ]

sathigur n saevae so kaahae aaeiaa ||

Those who do not serve the True Guru-why did they even come into this world?

iDRgu jIvxu ibrQw jnmu gvwieAw ]

dhhrig jeevan birathhaa janam gavaaeiaa ||

Cursed are their lives; they have uselessly wasted this human life.

mnmuiK nwmu iciq n AwvY ibnu nwvY bhu duKu pwvixAw ]7]

manamukh naam chith n aavai bin naavai bahu dhukh paavaniaa ||7||

The self-willed manmukhs do not remember the Naam. Without the Naam, they suffer in terrible pain. ||7||

ijin issit swjI soeI jwxY ]

jin sisatt saajee soee jaanai ||

The One who created the Universe, He alone knows it.

Awpy mylY sbid pCwxY ]

aapae maelai sabadh pashhaanai ||

He unites with Himself those who realize the Shabad.

nwnk nwmu imilAw iqn jn kau ijn Duir msqik lyKu ilKwvixAw ]8]1]32]33]

naanak naam miliaa thin jan ko jin dhhur masathak laekh likhaavaniaa ||8||1||32||33||

O Nanak, they alone receive the Naam, upon whose foreheads such pre-ordained destiny is recorded. ||8||1||32||33||

[Surd_r_cute 0]

Great ( shabad + intimate= bedbai) , So you belive in muslim theory of say god being in a particular direction i.e when guru nanak ji went to mecca he was told not point his feet towards mecca and you know rest of story. So time you are supposedly getting intimate is an unclean time?

if some has a habit of doing saying waheguru saas giras, what should he or she do? according to you stop saying waheguru for those moments. I guess they should , cause than technically they are doing bedbai.

[Surd_r_cute 0]

Why even bother get intimate with each other for " the natural making of a family " instead of going to bed go to lab for test tube baby and just full fill what is expected from humans.

[Guest Guest]

if we have maharaj ji's prakash in a separate room of the house, is being intimate allowed if we're trying to have a baby?

[SSM 5]

This is the biggest of the biggest joke.

How can anyone expect you to not be close to your partner, is your wife maya??

So what is the point in being married if you dont love partner?

Its a union of the souls and if you dont love one another how possible?

I am sorry to say this is getting very serious now. If it is so wrong then why live together? Why have the same room?All those against it, I say get married and then come and tell us if you are sleeping in separate rooms and then how your partner reacted to this and how it is affecting your married life. If it is healthy for your family and for your children to see that the parents dont 'love another' then that is OK but I can assure you it is much healthier to have a loving stable family life to benefit all.

What some people don't seem to understand here is that you don't become close to have kids, that can be a reason but, you need love to get close in the first place and I'm going to say this in the most respectable way possible but a man cannot have a child with his wife UNLESS he likes being close to her.

Anyways I leave it at that for now.

[Mehtab Singh 3,906]

misskaur penji

Do a sincere Ardas with all ur heart and soul and take Hukamnama from Gurujee Himself. You can do it online or from Gurujee's saroop. He will surely answer you. What the rest of us are doing here is giving our own personal opinions. The fact that u asked this question means ur soul feels that something could be wrong. So go to the Master Himself and He shall clarify everything for u :wub:

May Gurujee bless u with a happy married life :TH:

[Guest 1]

how is kissing or hugging going to improve ur sikhi jeevan i wonder??

and dont give me the usual of, "oh its just love, were sposed to love evry one"

the only true love is for maharaaj and all of our actions cud from this love

158045[/snapback]

how is going on sikh forums just to Criticize others going to improve your sikhi jeevan i wonder??

[Guest Guest]

how is kissing or hugging going to improve ur sikhi jeevan i wonder??

and dont give me the usual of, "oh its just love, were sposed to love evry one"

the only true love is for maharaaj and all of our actions cud from this love

158045[/snapback]

how is going on sikh forums just to Criticize others going to improve your sikhi jeevan i wonder??

158114[/snapback]

Rather than argue amongst yourselves why not answer the bhenjis question constructively.

[Guest _singh_]

guru sahib is hazar nazar. god see's all and knows all.

do you people think if they are intimate when shabad is playing its beadbi, and if they are intimate when shabad is not playing it is not beadbi.

god is everywhere, shabad is everywhere. naam is swaas swaas 24/7. Do you think you can fool god. God knows everything.

If they are living in grist they are doing nothing wrong, they are listening to bani which should always be encouraged.

Who are you people to say people who live in grist can't make children when guru sahib is in the house or shabad is playing. I advise you to look in to what sikhi is. Did the singhs in puraatan times live with guru sahib and also have families, how were those families made? The act of making children is not against sikhi, just as going to the toilet isnt against sikhi, it is a part of life. To say that this is beadbi is foolish, if you can't do something infront the presence of guru sahib dont ever do it. And since guru sahib is hazar nazar present everywhere, always. If you think being intimate with your spouse is beadbi, dont ever have kids, because guru sahib is everywhere.

People need to reconsider there views, because they make no sense, speak to some elder gursikhs, open your eyes. Youth these days dont know anything, dont go to them for advice. Go to guru sahib, go to elders who have lived the life of a sikh. People with kamaaye

[Heera Singh 3]

excellent post above...

[Guest Lohgarh Singh]

wjkk wjkf

u married ur a allowed 2 be intimate with ur husband

ur sikh, u listen 2 bani

simple as, like _singh_ paji sed u do simran in ur mind anyway,

analyse the situation and break it down as simply as possible

[Jaspaul Singh 17]

last 2 posts hit it spot on ..

nice reply ! :TH: