Divorce In Sikhism

[Jassi Kaur]

Divorce in Sikhism

WJKK WJKF

my friend is going to get divorced it’s a very hard for her. it made me think. i wanted to knw how do people feel about this? is there anything that says it right or wrong thing to do? and so many sikhs are geting divorced these days.

[Guest Gupt Singhni]

There’s no such thing as divorce in Sikhi but I don't believe it is wrong but to marry someone else afterwards is wrong because then they have more than one spouse.

[Guest Hardeep_S_Khalsa]

In Guroo Amardas Sahib Jee's times, it was considered as a big taboo by the Hindu - Bramans to have a divorce and then get re-married again. In fact when a widow's husband died, it was Hindu tradition for the widow to jump into the same fire her husband was getting cremated into. Guroo Amardass Sahib Jee stopped this tradition which was even followed by many sikhs. Therefore you can have a divorce and then get re-married. This again is a contraversial topic and some believe its against gurmat to get divorced and then remarried.

[sikh supreme]

Divorce in Sikhism

WJKK WJKF

my friend is going to get divorced it’s a very hard for her. it made me think. i wanted to knw how do people feel about this? is there anything that says it right or wrong thing to do? and so many sikhs are geting divorced these days.

If theres kids involved it will be far harder. Marriage is not a game, in Sikhi it is a union of two souls so both the husband and wife have to work and compramise at it. That is why it essetnial to finding the right partner, someone who knows everything about you and your past, someone you can share you life with till death. If you find the wrong person it usualy works out that once trust is lost, relationships break down irreversibly.

As for so many Sikhs getting divorced, it stems from selfish lifestyles. Motherhood is one of the most important jobs a woman can do. If the wife fails to furfil those duties towards her husband what is her worth as a woman? as a wife? Traditionally things worked out, but in this day and age women want lifestyles like men but yet dont realise the consequences , the impact they are having on the community and next generation of Sikhs.

“Children are more educated these days and many are not prepared to do so. Women want to be treated equally and they cannot accept any discrimination from their in- laws.” Malaysian Gurdwaras Council secretary Malkith Singh said more people were becoming career- minded.

“Women, especially the educated ones, are becoming more independent.

They are professionals and want to live a life of their own.” Malkith said more peoplewere also putting off marriage as they wanted to be financially secure first.

He was concerned with the high divorce rate among Sikh couples.

“With more couples working now, you can expect such problems.

Sadly, it has caused many family break- ups.” - Taken from article (Fewer Malaysian Sikhs Are Choosing The Path Of Matrimonial Bliss)

http://www.sikhsangat.com/index.php?showto...mp;#entry240092

Have you asked your friend to see a marriage counseller? maybe the marriage can be saved, issues resolved with 3rd party involvement?

[Medallion Stallion]

no one should ever get divorced...................for one thing its too bloody expensive and it can leave you physically and emotionally drained............separates families including the relatives......................and its ALWAYS the childen that get hurt (if any are involved).........because young children think the whole world revolves around them at that age and if their parents fight or get divorced they always think its their fault.................

[JustME]

no one should ever get divorced...................for one thing its too bloody expensive and it can leave you physically and emotionally drained............separates families including the relatives......................and its ALWAYS the childen that get hurt (if any are involved).........because young children think the whole world revolves around them at that age and if their parents fight or get divorced they always think its their fault.................

i agree, my parent got divorced and now my dad is re-married but i never see him..............i constantly locked in their battles and i hated it...........

i have noticed thought as the younger generations are having more love marraiges i feel there is a rush to get married so they can BE togther rathe than actually taking the marriage seriously................i feel its only when you live with someone you get to know whatits realy like and then couple decide maybe it wasnt such a good idea to rush the marriage.......................

this is where the older generation needs to begome abit more liberal in the sense that people should realy realise and aget to know someone properly before you commit to the idea of marraige.................cos the santaty of marriage is special and shoukd be treated as a game........

bhul chuck maaf

JustME

xx

[B4ND4]

i agree, my parent got divorced and now my dad is re-married but i never see him..............i constantly locked in their battles and i hated it...........

i have noticed thought as the younger generations are having more love marraiges i feel there is a rush to get married so they can BE togther rathe than actually taking the marriage seriously................i feel its only when you live with someone you get to know whatits realy like and then couple decide maybe it wasnt such a good idea to rush the marriage.......................

this is where the older generation needs to begome abit more liberal in the sense that people should realy realise and aget to know someone properly before you commit to the idea of marraige.................cos the santaty of marriage is special and shoukd be treated as a game........

bhul chuck maaf

JustME

xx

I would like to differ here. I dont think the youth should take marriage matters in their hands. Our elders have seen this world and they definitely know what is better for us. It is for our own good that we leave this job to em and concentrate on our jeevans.

Once a person starts looking for a potential match his/her mind is diverted from the real goal. While doing paath he/she thinks of his/her partner, so instead of having a positive effect it turns out to be more of a distraction. Moreover there is no way you can know a person. You might know the person in 10 mins, 10 months or may be longer.

So let your elders decide that for you and always remember marriage is about adjustments and compromising. When families are involved, individuals take each and every step with caution and try to work things out which is not the case otherwise.

AND

Gursikhs don't have the word "divorce" in their dictionary.

B4ND4R

yy

[wjkk wjkf]

no one should ever get divorced...................for one thing its too bloody expensive and it can leave you physically and emotionally drained............separates families including the relatives......................and its ALWAYS the childen that get hurt (if any are involved).........because young children think the whole world revolves around them at that age and if their parents fight or get divorced they always think its their fault.................

i agree, my parent got divorced and now my dad is re-married but i never see him..............i constantly locked in their battles and i hated it...........

i have noticed thought as the younger generations are having more love marraiges i feel there is a rush to get married so they can BE togther rathe than actually taking the marriage seriously................i feel its only when you live with someone you get to know whatits realy like and then couple decide maybe it wasnt such a good idea to rush the marriage.......................

this is where the older generation needs to begome abit more liberal in the sense that people should realy realise and aget to know someone properly before you commit to the idea of marraige.................cos the santaty of marriage is special and shoukd be treated as a game........

bhul chuck maaf

JustME

xx

My parents had a 'love' marraige and until last year the whole world thought that they had the strongest husband-wife relationship you could get. But sometimes you don't know what a couple is going through. I agree that gettin to know eachother etc is a big factor but if a couple is together for 20 years and then realise that they can no longer be together (and they probably only made it to 20 cos of the kids) then maybe it's for the best. Marraige is for the SOUL and body too. If you're putting your soul through terrible-times just cos it's taboo to get divorced, then it aint right. Sometimes divorce CAN solve problems. If a couple is at it like cats and dogs then trust me, the kids dont like it then either. my rents have split but now, when they spend time together with us they are civil and they concentrate more on what we have instead of constant bickering like I know a lot of split couples do. I dunno..maybe I'm just ranting or whatever, but my point is this; noone should point fingers or judge because that right is only GuruJi's. So if a couple wanna get married support them, if they wanna get divorced support them. Cos when these decisions are made the people need friends n family to be with them. Turning your back dont help noone.

I'm no fan of divorce, in fact I'm pretty against, but there's no right or wrong answer for this kinda stuff....hehe hope that helped, probably didnt

[JustME]

Banday jee you make a very good point.................my humble opinion is based on personal experiences cos here, love marriages are more and more common whether it is right or wrong, we cant change the fact that it is happening and the younger generation are changing....................

i guess what im trying to say is that if parents marry their children to someone cos and another someone sed "oh he/she are very well mannered, religious, etc etc, unless we see in for our own eyes...........its best to know all the facts about a person BEFORE marraige cos this is how i have seen girls lives ruined...AND is a main reason/cause for couples to get divorced.......especially when guys over here marry gals from India, i know one girl who did exactly as her parents sed, only met the guy three weeks before their wedding and he turned out to be a drunk and beat her so bad that she left him...........................

Veerjee UR right cos parents may have to best intention for their children and wish nothing more than their happiness but without proper knowledge of an individual BEFORE such a commitment is agreed upon. i think there needs to be a balance that satifies both the younger and older generation...........so both are happy....................

again just my humble opinion

bhul chuck maaf

JustME

zz

[JustME]

So if a couple wanna get married support them, if they wanna get divorced support them. Cos when these decisions are made the people need friends n family to be with them. Turning your back dont help noone.

I'm no fan of divorce, in fact I'm pretty against, but there's no right or wrong answer for this kinda stuff....hehe hope that helped, probably didnt

well said bhenjee :TH: