Sikhi & Contraception

[Guest JSingh]

Wjkk Wjkf. I was asked this question by another Singh so I started looking into it & am confused really so basically....Are you allowed to wear a condom when doing the thing with your Singhini? If no, is it safe without it? If yes, why? I've established that the other stuff is a no-no i.e. pills etc. I just need this clearing, the condom issue. Thank you Ji.

[Guest Liberal thinker]

That's your own business what you get up to between your wife etc why does religion have to dictate what contraception or not you should be using how you should get up to intimacy??

[Guest mili]

I would not stress on it too much, its between you and your spouse, as long as she is happy about it too, read rehat to satisfy yourself ( i am pretty sure it says nothing in regard to this), but i understand how you feel, do ardas to Guru ji if you are burdened by this.

[sukhi077]

lol..what a useless question.........

[VanHelsingh]

A few more years and people will be asking if it's okay to breathe.

[Guest 533434402]

What a stupid question. You know that whenever someone says 'I was asked by a friend' or a 'Friend told me...' You know that no friend asked anything, it's the person themselves who is asking the question.

Back to the question- sex is about reproducing offspring ie having children. It's not about pleasure and never should be because that is exactly what Guru JI has explained as being Kaam (lust). Therefore the question about wearing a condom or contraception should never arise. The answer to the question is NO you can't wear condom or use contraception because you should be having sex only for the purposes of having children and not for your own gratification.

[Mehtab Singh]

You know that whenever someone says 'I was asked by a friend' or a 'Friend told me...' You know that no friend asked anything, it's the person themselves who is asking the question.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[N30S1NGH]

A few more years and people will be asking if it's okay to breathe.

It's already happening, breath audibly inhale and exhale..some people will think you are rss.

[N30S1NGH]

In my view you can use contraception because on deeper spiritual level even bhog bilas becomes divine along with rest of life, as individual perceptions changes.. begineer both have to honest about themselves, and observe their perception during bhog. In sikhi, one cannot have bhog with their spouse with the western mindset- there is no way one can justify that but with rather spiritual divine mindset.

In gurbani, at deeper stages, there is no duality left as such, vahiguroo is taking both roles and himself playing in his play:

Namo Jog Jogi || Namo Bhog Bhogi ||

Jogi Andar Jogia Tu Bhogi Andar Bhogia ||

Tap Mein Tapasvi Grihast Mein Bhogi ||

According to my research after talking to senior gurmukhs i tried to write on this subject in the past:

I have seen many cases of amritdhari being divorced. Number one reason amritdhari being divorced because they think can their other partner is some sort of maya test- its ought break their sikhi.

If you cannot have bhog with your wife when other party gives clues then may be you shouldn't be in the gristhi jevani at the first place. One party living like behingum in gristhi jevan is big no, causes many issues. It's not recommended by mahapursh nor its recommended by senior gurmukhs.

But the key issue is - spiritual life should intertwine with your social life but intertwine not replace, thats key difference here..guru maharaj gave us order to live life socially and be in gristh jeevan for that we are given social puratan granths like- prem sumarag granth etc etc.

Prem Sumarag granth one of puratan and progressive granths- how to live life socially.singhs have to remember - for the most part- female having bhog with their husband..its more feeling of deep love towards their husband..singhs himself should not be attached with bhog (be nirlaip be still engage) as naturally we tend to be more kaami but singh should engage in bhog with their singhani to keep her happy so she does not feel frustrated inside.

You could also look at your own self or perception very carefully and honestly with your bibek buddhi and test yourself, if your perception is based on western standards of bhog birthi (fullfilling your desires), without any question you are kaami you are slave of panj choor, but if your perception is sabh gobind hai sabh gobind hai and showing affection then its fine he/she comes under- "sabh gobind hai sabh gobind hai" then your mind is becoming part of higher dristhi kaun (perception) of sabh gobind hai..!!!

Griisthi should have mindset of- sabh gobind hai sabh gobind hai. No doubt, for student this thought of oneness(higher reality) itself is double edge sword and its bit of slippery slope but based on the avastha, but at the end you know who you are deceiving, you deceiving yourself as you know about your mind than anyone else...use your intellect(buddhi) as a witness to see perception of our mind upon making love to your wife or husband.

Be honest with yourself and you will see things more clearly..its all about one's perception.

[sat]

Personally i feel that if vaheguru is forgotten during the act then kaam has taken control, if the act is carried out between husband and wife with vaheguru ji in mind then its is he himself as n30singh ji says sab gobind hai.

It is for the purpose of producing offspring and we are told to keep it to a minimum, but i dont think we are committing a kurehat as long as kaam does not take control fully or in a western manor, another way to look at it is that actually within a marriage sex can help keep kaam stabilized, until it can be controlled, but these are my own opinions and i dont think there are many of us who can say they have not succumb to kaam, all we can do is ask for forgiveness and the strength to control it, but rather it in a marriage than otherwise that would bea major problem and a kurehat especially for an amritdhari.

And if it stops ones eyes/ mind from wondering away from your spouse then rather that, than the other.

As for use of a condom that's a personal choice and a " holier than thou" attitude i will not give here.

It would say you wont find anything in regards to this in any rehatnama for obvious reasons but

apni istri surat hoi rehatvan Gur ka singh soi

if you keep your eyes and mind off others wife, daughter etc and look at your own wife you are not gonna be in trouble with Guru ji that's for sure, well that's what i believe and follow, keep your eyes down !! :smile2: