I just browsed shaadi.com for the first time in years

[BhForce]

On 3/23/2022 at 3:40 AM, MisterrSingh said:

They're certainly not sitting home on a Saturday night reading Sikh ithaas. 

What're you talking about, bro? They're translating Suraj Prakash into all the languages of the UN.

(Cue for softies to misquote "So kio manda akhiai jit jamhe rajaan")

[BhForce]

On 3/23/2022 at 11:49 PM, Ranjeet01 said:

Go join the gym and lose some weight you fat fu.k, maybe then some girl will find you attractive enough to marry you.

With respect, bro, I think you totally fail to understand the male-female situation today. (And while I'm talking about general society, it all filters down the Sikh society, too.)

The jokes that people are cracking above are in reaction to the fact that women have completely unreasonable standards.

Do you really think that the spates of "I'm not happy!" women divorcing billionaires like Kanye West are because he's fat and ugly?

A reasonable standard is a woman of average attractiveness wanting a man of average attractiveness and average finances.

An unreasonable standard is all women, fat, ugly, normal, and beautiful, all requiring handsome young millionaires with mansions and yachts.

The average American man of marrying age (20 to 34) earns from $31K to $46K. Exactly how many women are specifying that as their "minimum".  Forget that, their minimums are set to the top 5% income-earners. But they are not the top 5% beautiful women.

 

Note: It's OK to want a handsome millionaire. It is not OK to require it. It's one thing to daydream, it's another to stay single until your eggs dry up just because you can't snag a handsome millionaire.

[BhForce]

On 3/23/2022 at 6:04 PM, GurjantGnostic said:

You want a husband or welfare?

I'm sorry, but what are you talking, bro?

Another name for "welfare", as you call it, is marriage. As we've always known it, except for the past few decades, when also everything has gone to tell.

@proudkaur21 said she'd rather stay at home and raise children instead of a corporate job. That's the best thing a Sikh woman (or any woman) could do.

The famouse pauri from Asa di Vaar praising women is written in praise of them as vessels. The word ਭੰਡ means vessel. (Meaning carrier of babies.)

Guru Nanak ji says the greatness of women is in birthing great children:
 

ਸੋ ਕਿਉ ਮੰਦਾ ਆਖੀਐ ਜਿਤੁ ਜੰਮਹਿ ਰਾਜਾਨ ॥
sō kiu mandā ākhīai jit janmah rājān .

How can those be called bad who give birth to kings?

[BhForce]

On 3/23/2022 at 2:34 PM, proudkaur21 said:

I just want a Sikh man who is religious , caring and understanding and would be fine with me wanting to be a stay at home mom in the future if i want lol.

Well, this thread isn't about you. It's about these crazy women who only want a man who has a Ferrari in the garage and a helicopter landing pad in the back yard.

Wanting a good Sikh man who is dedicated to marriage and raising children is completely reasonable.

On 3/23/2022 at 2:34 PM, proudkaur21 said:

Corporate jobs add so much stress to your life. Hard to take care of children and home while working 9 to 5.

Good. I salute your dedication to wanting to be a mother. That's a much higher calling than some corporate drone job.

[GurjantGnostic]

1 hour ago, BhForce said:

I'm sorry, but what are you talking, bro?

Another name for "welfare", as you call it, is marriage. As we've always known it, except for the past few decades, when also everything has gone to tell.

@proudkaur21 said she'd rather stay at home and raise children instead of a corporate job. That's the best thing a Sikh woman (or any woman) could do.

The famouse pauri from Asa di Vaar praising women is written in praise of them as vessels. The word ਭੰਡ means vessel. (Meaning carrier of babies.)

Guru Nanak ji says the greatness of women is in birthing great children:
 

ਸੋ ਕਿਉ ਮੰਦਾ ਆਖੀਐ ਜਿਤੁ ਜੰਮਹਿ ਰਾਜਾਨ ॥
sō kiu mandā ākhīai jit janmah rājān .

How can those be called bad who give birth to kings?

All about the attitude bro you know I recommend someone stay home with the kids but I don't recommend someone that ropes a husband into it for the wrong reasons because they're lazy. 

[BhForce]

Just now, GurjantGnostic said:

All about the attitude bro you know I recommend someone stay home with the kids but I don't recommend someone that ropes a husband into it for the wrong reasons because they're lazy. 

OK, I suppose. I certainly wouldn't want a woman to "stay at home" and just watch soap operas the whole day. She should be doing full Nitnem plus Asa di Vaar. Learning keertan. Singing Japji to her kids, and teaching them. Teaching them Punjabi, Gurmukhi, and Sikh history. Helping them memorize Nitnem.

Doing Sukhmani Sahib, possibly with other women.

Tending an organic garden to get fresh fruit and vegetables for her family and make food every day. (That's the maryada established by Guru Amar Das ji). Helping poor people. Mending her family's clothes. Taking care of her mother and father in law. Sewing Rumala Sahibs for Guru ji. 

And greeting her husband when he comes home in the evening and then doing Rehras along with the kids.

But not the stupid corporate office job.

[GurjantGnostic]

2 minutes ago, BhForce said:

OK, I suppose. I certainly wouldn't want a woman to "stay at home" and just watch soap operas the whole day. She should be doing full Nitnem plus Asa di Vaar. Learning keertan. Singing Japji to her kids, and teaching them. Teaching them Punjabi, Gurmukhi, and Sikh history. Helping them memorize Nitnem.

Doing Sukhmani Sahib, possibly with other women.

Tending an organic garden to get fresh fruit and vegetables for her family and make food every day. (That's the maryada established by Guru Amar Das ji). Helping poor people. Mending her family's clothes. Taking care of her mother and father in law. Sewing Rumala Sahibs for Guru ji. 

And greeting her husband when he comes home in the evening and then doing Rehras along with the kids.

But not the stupid corporate office job.

None of which I've ever heard Bhenji talk about. But we know she doesn't like working. 

The way you do one thing is the way you do everything. Work ethic applies to the home as well. 

 

[BhForce]

1 minute ago, GurjantGnostic said:

None of which I've ever heard Bhenji talk about. But we know she doesn't like working. 

The way you do one thing is the way you do everything. Work ethic applies to the home as well. 

 

Well, what if she just finds a man to subsidize her posting good content to Sikhsangat all day? That'd be fine. 

It'd take a load off of some us to refute a lot of the anti-Panthic nonsense out there!

[GurjantGnostic]

4 minutes ago, BhForce said:

Well, what if she just finds a man to subsidize her posting good content to Sikhsangat all day? That'd be fine. 

It'd take a load off of some us to refute a lot of the anti-Panthic nonsense out there!

Many things look similar, or sound similar, but due to their intention or energy are entirely different I don't really care what Bhenji does what worries me is that she comes across as lazy and more interested in not working than actually being a Gursikh. Which is probably not what a loyal Singh deserves in a wife. An expense. 

[BhForce]

3 minutes ago, GurjantGnostic said:

Many things look similar, or sounds similar, but due to their intention or energy are entirely different

This is correct.

3 minutes ago, GurjantGnostic said:

I don't really care what Bhenji does what worries me is that she comes across as lazy and more interested in not working

My take is that every cell of her body is telling her to fulfill her destiny as a ਭਾਂਡਾ (vessel). Because she is a woman.

And also every cell is tell her that her corporate drone job is pointless.

So hopefully she'll find a man and keep busy doing the stuff that the Sikh women of Guru ji's time did.