Physical Relationship (sex)

[Heera Singh]

Any reference from gurbani that says you can have sex with ur wife at all??? Any reference from gurbani that says you can drive a car instead of riding a horse everywhere? Any reference to gurbani that says you must keep ur kakkars on u at all times?

not everythings written in gurbaani... certain things are just common sense ... and even if we have problems, we can alwayz consult our panj pyaray.. some people don't wanna ask their panj because they're afraid what they mite say.. and by doin that, they're risking breaking their amrit...

if one had full sharda in Guru jee, he/she would have no problem consulting our beloved panj pyaray..

IMHO you can't maintain a Grisht Jeevan with one person that is Amridhari and one that isn't... those 2 people have 2 different jeevans, and are on 2 different paths.. i personally don't even think a non-amritdhari and an amritdhari should get married in the first place... i believe they should BOTH be amritdhari.. if one isn't, then wait till that one takes amrit before gettin married... anywayz... tha's jus my opinion... like i said earlier.. what we say don't count... Guru Jee's word comes from our beloved Panj Pyaray... :TH:

bhul chuk maaf

Vaheguru Jee Ka Khalsa, Vaheguru Jee Kee Fateh!!

[mann_kaum_layee_qurbaan]

people always demand references from gurbaani, let's remember that Guru gobind singh ji bowed before the panj piyaare and took amrit from guru panth khalsa. You may not find quotes about two amritdharis and marriage but the khalsa panth has the god given authority to create panthic maryada as the sikh rehit maryada was created. Guru Panth and Guru Granth. when you go to the panj pyaare that is like being in the hazoori of guru sahib himslef.

sorry to get off topic but i have noticed this in a lot of posts where people want(demand) quotes from gurbaani and ignore decisions made by the panth, guru panth khalsa.

[Talwinder Kaur]

Any reference from gurbani that says you can have sex with ur wife at all??? Any reference from gurbani that says you can drive a car instead of riding a horse everywhere? Any reference to gurbani that says you must keep ur kakkars on u at all times?

not everythings written in gurbaani... certain things are just common sense ... and even if we have problems, we can alwayz consult our panj pyaray.. some people don't wanna ask their panj because they're afraid what they mite say.. and by doin that, they're risking breaking their amrit...

if one had full sharda in Guru jee, he/she would have no problem consulting our beloved panj pyaray..

IMHO you can't maintain a Grisht Jeevan with one person that is Amridhari and one that isn't... those 2 people have 2 different jeevans, and are on 2 different paths.. i personally don't even think a non-amritdhari and an amritdhari should get married in the first place... i believe they should BOTH be amritdhari.. if one isn't, then wait till that one takes amrit before gettin married... anywayz... tha's jus my opinion... like i said earlier.. what we say don't count... Guru Jee's word comes from our  beloved Panj Pyaray...  :TH:

bhul chuk maaf

Vaheguru Jee Ka Khalsa, Vaheguru Jee Kee Fateh!!

148653[/snapback]

i totally agree wid u Paaji...

[Guest Guest]

what is joot? if someone can succinctly define this then please let me know.

also why? why? why? can a amritdhari not marry a non-amrithdari?

i mean what happend before amrit was arround?

i'm baffled, i dont think people r using brains here, this is bipran ki reet! theres a limit to what joot is, to say your wife who id non-amritdhari is joot is completely rediculous and goes against the anand karaj. Explain this?

Oh and i take it all these amrithdaris undertake sarbloh maryada?

and oh wud you eat your mums food if she was not amritdhari? if not why?

[Tera]

Quotes from Sri Guru Gobind Singh Ji...

ਰਹਿਤ ਸਹਿਤ ਜਹ ਪਾਂਚੋਂ ਮਿਲੇ ॥ ਮਮ ਸਰੂਪ ਦੇਖਹੁ ਤਹ ਭਲੇ ॥

"Where five Singhs with excellent rehat are congregated, see my true form/spirit within them."

"rehit pyaari muj ko sikh pyaara nayhee"

"The sikh rehat (conduct) is more beloved to me than the Sikh."

The rehat that we should follow is in the rehat maryada. (Full Rehat Maryada can be seen here) The rehat maryada states...

If a married person takes Amrit by themselves and their spouse is not Amritdharee, then he/she can not have a physical relationship with them unless they too become Amritdharee. Just as a clean dish coming into contact with an unclean one also becomes dirty, the same is true for a married couple (this is because it becomes difficult to maintain their discipline). A husband and wife should take Amrit together in order for them to maintain their Rehat. A married person does not have permission to take Amrit without their spouse, but if they insist they must abide by the above conditions.

Question answered. No physical relation can take between an amritdharee and non-amritdharee. End of story?

[Heera Singh]

ALSO.. view some points on this site.... it is the the OFFICIAL rules for the Khalsa Panth...

SGPC

view points on Article XVIII

a. A Sikh man and woman should enter wedlock without giving thought to the prospective        spouse's caste and descent.

    b. A Sikh's daughter must be married to a Sikh.

    c. A Sikh's marriage should be solemnized by Anand marriage rites.

......

k. Persons professing faiths other than the Sikh faith cannot be joined in wedlock by        the Anand Karaj ceremony.

.....

    q. A baptised ought to get his wife also baptised.

and that is the PANTHIC stance.. so if u go against that... ur anti-panthic :TH:

also... Satguru Jee tells us

'rainee rehit soee sikh mayra, oh tthakur mai us ka chayra... rehit bina sikh na kahavia, rehit binee bhram chota khavai...' (please forgive my spelling mistakes)

so if a wedding ceremony is to take place between 2 Sikhs... then it says rite there what a Sikh is... one who keeps REHIT...

[Heera Singh]

btw .. if ur still confused about what a sikh is.... listen to this..

Definition Of A Sikh

[Sat1176]

Veer,

If your Amritdhari then ideally it would be nice to marry someone who is also Amritdhari coz you are both walking on the same path. There is no point marrying someone who isn't religious because that is when then differences will begin to appear. You will want to listern to Kirtan or go the gurdwara and she might want to go clubbing and listern to something else. Obviously it is a complete mismatch of people. However saying that just because a person is an amrithdhari doesn't automatically make them into a decent human being. Just because the person has taken Amrit does not mean they are no longer stubborn, compromising, disrespectful, hurtful individuals. Just because a person is Amritdhari alone is not going to make them a perfect life partner. I can say that with complete confidence coz I have been on the recieving end of such an individual. For your information I am not amrithdhari. but married a girl who was. The problems wasn't due to the fact that she was Amritdhari, but her attitude in other issues, her whole evil personality and character. I probably had more respect for her as an amritdhari then she did.

If you can find a person who is Amritdhari with good values that we expect from a partner, then indeed you will be a blessed soul. However it is very difficult to find a person who is 100% perfect in every area. That is for you to decide what is more important to you? But personally speaking if you meet someone who you like, who is religious and respects the fact that your amritdhari and isn't going to hold you back but support and encourage you and then eventually even walk along side you one day then I would go for it. The physical aspects of the relationship are the least important things you are going to have to think about when choosing your life partner. Whilst mutual attaction is important, it no good without some other important qualities.

The exact same problem arises when two non-amritdhari people get married. With time one might want to take Amrit and the other doesn't. What is the person who wants to take amrit supposed to do if they can't convince their partner to take it with them? Does that person have to remain neygura for the rest of their life? I was listerning to a raagi and he explained that exact issue came up a while back. A lady went before the panj pyarray alone and they refused her amrit on the grounds she had come alone. She said she had tried her absolute best to convince her partner but he still didn't agree. She pleaded with them to give her amrit but they still refused. In the end she stood there and did an ardas and said, Guru-ji when I die and am asked why I haven't taken Amrit, you cannot blame me for I came before your panj pyaaray and they refused. So it has now become their responsibility. Obviously this has now become a difficult situation. From what the very knowledgable raagi said, the panth had to discuss this issue and it was decided to allow individuls to take amrit on their own, however if both can take it together so much the better. Does that now mean, her amrit is broken when she gets home? Oh please, don't make amrit out to be so weak. I would be absolutely surprised if Guru-ji treated her any different from any other amritdhari.

Bhul Chuk Maaf

[khalsaterishaan]

Veerji  i just wanted to ask that i am a amrit dhariand will my amrit break if i have sex with a non amritdhari girl ( my wife) ofcourse.

plz tell me that will it break even by kissing her .the physical relationship is in marriage only and no outsider is there but my wife is non amritdhari Any Suggestions

147147[/snapback]

khalsa jeo

lets get bit practical it is important that both wife and husband should be amritdhari becoz its written in our panthic maryada and every sikh should follow it but sometimes u are caught in such a situation where u can't help the cause.

suppose if one of the member wants to get baptised and the other one does'nt so does that mean that one who wants should also not take amrit becoz his/her partner does not agree? thats rubbish instead you should think that u get baptised and set an example by bringing a change in your life in front of ur partner so that he also says that i also want to get baptised.

that would be the perfect example and an insipiration.and mind it that there is nothing jhooth or such thing.

A body cannot get suchi only the soul can get via shabad

the body can only get cleaned thats way we take ishnaan daily so keep our body clean and fit and we do simran and path to keep our soul awake and suchi

sorry to those whom i have offended

[Guest Guest]

Hes obviously married to her, loves her and all that. I think it is OKAY for him to have sex with his WIFE! I think religion is a way of life... and he/ she can interpret it to whatever they want to... do what you think feels right... anywayz i don't like to be caught up in details so all of you can go ahead and tell me im wrong... the whole point sikhi came about was to abolish caste system and injustices. Saying that your amritdari and only can marry amritdaris is like saying your jatt and you only marry jatts, or your chinese so you only marry chinese, or your brown so you only marry brown...