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jkvlondon

How to reframe life for kids ...

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8 hours ago, jkvlondon said:

for someone who doesn't know anything you sure do talk a LOT

when you tell someone they have a condition, they start to think they do!

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On 1/19/2019 at 1:42 PM, dallysingh101 said:

What I want to know is how the hell does a father or uncle broach the subject of sex and attraction with a teenage girl? Because Panjabi moms seem useless at it from what I see. 

This is critical because that's when the groomers start making moves. Sometimes it seems like females don't understand other young female brains? 

I think using current news headlines to talk to girls is possible. One can ask them, do you know what grooming is? Lota of panjabi girls, vulnerable have been involved in it. Then explain grooming a PG way: 

"That men who are older try to trick younger girls into liking them.throw in some life lessons like young girls are usually eager to have a boyfriend and to be liked, so that is why evil men target them. The men bring them gifts, take them to parties etc. Then they take pictures of the girl out with them. And then they threaten to release photos to family if the girl doesnt do wat they want etc"

In america, there was this whole thing going on abt men kidnapping young boys and assaulting them. So had to teach younger brother that if a man approaches and says i need ur help rescuing a puppy, only u r small enough. That this is a trick as there r so many ppl around, why target only you? And practiced similar mental scenarios, of 'kidnappers' luring them. 

I dont think we need to totally spell out sexual assault to kids. Just warn about how people target and manipulate you. When i was young, i asked my parents what a veshwa was and they said a dancer who dances on kothe. Was enough for me at that age. 

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On 3/21/2019 at 11:26 PM, Not2Cool2Argue said:

I think using current news headlines to talk to girls is possible. One can ask them, do you know what grooming is? Lota of panjabi girls, vulnerable have been involved in it. Then explain grooming a PG way: 

"That men who are older try to trick younger girls into liking them.throw in some life lessons like young girls are usually eager to have a boyfriend and to be liked, so that is why evil men target them. The men bring them gifts, take them to parties etc. Then they take pictures of the girl out with them. And then they threaten to release photos to family if the girl doesnt do wat they want etc"

In america, there was this whole thing going on abt men kidnapping young boys and assaulting them. So had to teach younger brother that if a man approaches and says i need ur help rescuing a puppy, only u r small enough. That this is a trick as there r so many ppl around, why target only you? And practiced similar mental scenarios, of 'kidnappers' luring them. 

I dont think we need to totally spell out sexual assault to kids. Just warn about how people target and manipulate you. When i was young, i asked my parents what a veshwa was and they said a dancer who dances on kothe. Was enough for me at that age. 

Thanks for that. 

Keep it coming. 

I'm around more and more people who are potential targets of such predators these days. So upping my skills in raising their awareness without terrifying them is important. 

I'm wondering if we can actually inoculate even younger kurian to these things? 

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12 minutes ago, dallysingh101 said:

Thanks for that. 

Keep it coming. 

I'm around more and more people who are potential targets of such predators these days. So upping my skills in raising their awareness without terrifying them is important. 

I'm wondering if we can actually inoculate even younger kurian to these things? 

We are supposed to start talking about these things according to pediatrics association. Because lots of children are sexually abused esp by people they know. I think they released a guide abt how to talk to each age group about things like this. Like for 4 to 5 years old. You teach them that their private parts are meant to be covered at all times and no one should be touching them etc. 

 

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Just now, Not2Cool2Argue said:

We are supposed to start talking about these things according to pediatrics association. Because lots of children are sexually abused esp by people they know. I think they released a guide abt how to talk to each age group about things like this. Like for 4 to 5 years old. You teach them that their private parts are meant to be covered at all times and no one should be touching them etc. 

 

That's a bit much for me. 

The other day I was like:

"Remember some people pretend that they like you and that they care for you, but they are just acting. They are really good actors and in reality they don't really care about you, and may actually not like you and want bad things for you - but you can get fooled because their acting is so good. BUT we are smart aren't we. We don't get fooled like that! We will see them for what they are and not let them trick us. Because we are clever - not stupid."

Girls - self-esteem- attraction - all that stuff is one crazy ar5ed subject. 

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    • Lol. You'd think you'd be more understanding. 
    • sanskrit is only used for prayer as it is considered by brahmins as the language of the gods, in fact they would not teach to anyone who was not born  a brahmin . the fact that anyone of lower castes cannot hear sanskrit or read it means the brahmins had to speak in a 'lower' language for practicalities , for other castes they had to express themselves in 'manmade' languages for all their spiritual needs... Punjabi is so much richer and expressive because of this, a boli borne of the soil and the soul of Punjab
    • Theres always been an uneven ratio between girls and boys amongst British Indians due to sex selective abortion. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7123753.stm  
    • Yh I wonder why brahmins gave up sanskrit and started speaking other regional languages.     I'm all for reviving old languages  as long as they don't force them onto people who don't want to learn it Punjabi has its roots in sanskrit.  Early punjabi was adopted by the nath yogis and they used it to write spiritual poetry,  soon after that the sufis adopted punjabi.    I wonder if the punjabi poems written by the early nath yogis still exist?  I know that there are some jain manuscripts written in early punjabi that are preserved.  
    • The story of Ganika is mentioned in Guru Granth Sahib ji, Dasam Granth Sahib and in Bhai Gurdas jis vaarns. Ganika Paapan Swam Across the Worldly Ocean Pritpal Singh / January 14, 2014 ਗਨਕਾ ਪਾਪਨ ਹੋਇਕੈ ਪਾਪਾਂ ਦਾ ਗਲ ਹਾਰ ਪਰੋਤਾ॥
      gankaa paa pan hoek ai paa paa(n) d aa gal haa r parot aa||
      Gankaa was a sinful prostitute who wore the necklace of misdeeds around her neck.
      (Vaaran Bhai Gurdaas Ji, page 10) Ganika ‘Paapan’ (female gender for sinner) was a prostitute who indulged in worldly pleasure. Her whole life was spent doing many unsavory deeds. She never recited God’s Name. She was a prostitute by profession but not necessarily because she needed the money to survive but did it out of pleasure and enjoyment. ਮਹਾਂ ਪੁਰਖ ਅਚਾਣਚਕ ਗਣਕਾ ਵਾੜੇ ਆਇ ਖਲੋਤਾ॥
      Mahaa(n) pu rakh achaanachak gank aa vaa rrae aae kalo taa||
      Once a great man was passing by who halted in her courtyard. One day as it was raining heavily, a ‘Saadhoo’ (pious person seeking God) happened by chance to come by her house. He did not know who lived there. Ganika answered and saw that a Saadhoo had come to her doorstep. She danced to the kitchen and all the way back to the Saadhoo with a glass of milk in hand . From previous lives she had accumulated good Karma the fruits of which she would now receive. She would be blessed with an opportunity for salvation. The Saadhoo asked Ganika, “O daughter, what do you do for a living?” Ganika became embarrassed and said, “Forgive me, my karma is low. I am unfortunate as I am a prostitute.” The Saadhoo refused to drink the milk. “I cannot drink milk given by someone who earns their livelihood through corrupt, immoral means.” Ganika was moved and saddened that the Saadhoo refused to drink the milk. She pleaded with the Saadhoo, “Please drink the glass of milk. I will feel bad if you won’t drink it. What must I do for you to agree to drink it?” ਦੁਰਮਤਿ ਦੇਖ ਦਇਆਲ ਹੋਇ ਹਥਹੁੰ ਉਸਨੋਂ ਦਿਤੋਸੁ ਤੋਤਾ॥
      du rmat de kh dayiaal h oe, hath-hahu usn o(n) di- tos t otaa ||
      Seeing her bad plight he became compassionate and offered her a special parrot. ਰਾਮ ਨਾਮ ਉਪਦੇਸ ਕਰ ਖੇਲ ਗਿਆ ਦੇ ਵਣਜ ਸਉਤਾ॥
      r aam naa m upd es kar, khe l giaa d e vanaj sou taa||
      He told her to teach the parrot to repeat the name of Ram. Having made her understand this fruitful trade he then went away. The The Saadhoo said, “I will drink the milk, if you make one promise.” “Which is?” asked Ganika. The Saadhoo answered, “I will give you my parrot. I want you to promise to teach the parrot how to repeat ‘Raam’ (He who pervades everything) ” And with that, the Saadhoo departed from her house. ਲਿਵ ਲਾਗੀ ਤਿਸ ਤੋਤਿਅਹੁੰ ਨਿਤ ਪੜ੍ਹਾਏ ਕਰੈ ਅਸੋਤਾ॥
      li v laa gee
      thi s tho thiah u(n) ni th parrhaae ae karai asoth aa||
      Each and every day, with full concentration, she would teach the parrot to say Ram. Ganika began teaching the parrot as per the Saadhoo’s instruction. The parrot was a slow learner. It required intense effort of repetition of ‘Ram’ for the parrot to learn. Day and night she persevered. ਪਤਿਤ ਉਧਾਰਣ ਰਾਮ ਨਾਮ ਦੁਰਮਤਿ ਪਾਪ ਕਲੇਵਰ ਧੋਤਾ॥
      pat it u dhaaran r aam naa m, durmat p aap kalevar dh otaa ||
      The name of Lord is the liberator of the fallen ones. It washed away her evil wisdom and deeds. Repeating ‘Raam’ had a wonderful positive effect on Ganika. As she taught the parrot then also her spirits were uplifted . In time, the parrot learned to say Raam perfectly. By then it had also become an ingrained practice for her to repeat ‘Ram’ and she did so all day. ਅੰਤਕਾਲ ਜਮ ਜਾਲ ਤੋੜ ਨਰਕੈ ਵਿਚ ਨ ਖਾਧੁਸ ਗੋਤਾ॥
      antkaa l jam jaa l torr, narak ai vi ch na kaadh us go taa||
      At the time of death, it cut away the noose of Yama – the messenger of death she did not have to drown in the ocean of hell. ਗਈ ਬੈਕੁੰਠ ਬਿਬਾਣ ਚੜ੍ਹ ਨਾਉ ਨਾਰਾਇਣ ਛੋਤ ਅਛੋਤਾ॥
      ge-ee bai kunt b ibaa n charrh naao n aaraai n chhot achh otaa ||
      Due to the elixir of name (of the Lord) she became totally devoid of sins and was lifted to the heavens. ਥਾਉਂ ਨਿਥਾਵੇਂ ਮਾਣ ਮਣੋਤਾ ॥
      thhaa ou nithh aavae maan man othaa ||
      The name (of the Lord) is the last refuge of the shelterless ones. Repeating “Raam Raam Raam Raam Raam….”,Ganika’s mind was purified and her past misdeeds were washed away. Her karmic account had cleared by the time of her death and thus she was freed from the cycle of reincarnation. ਜਿਹ ਸਿਮਰਤ ਗਨਕਾ ਸੀ ਉਧਰੀ ਤਾ ਕੋ ਜਸੁ ਉਰ ਧਾਰੋ ॥1॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
      jih simrat gankaa see udhree taa ko jas ur dhaaro ||1|| rehaao ||
      Meditating on Him in remembrance, Ganika the prostitute was saved; enshrine His Praises within your heart. ||1||Pause||
      (Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, ang 632) Her dedicated repitition of ‘Ram’ became a deep meditation of God through which she attained her salvation despite her occupation and how she had spent her life. As she was cleansed then saved, enshrining His praises, so can anyone else be also blessed with salvation.    
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