Women, strength, liberation

[Guest Women]

I was reading another thread about women and wanted to make a thread with women and men addressing issues of sexism in society. I believe this is still a Huge problem not only in minority cultural groups in the world, but also society as a whole. 

What are people’s views on issues and how can we tackle them?

One of my strong opinions is that sexism is still rampant with Punjabi’s, and I have myself fallen victim to it, leading me to having been beaten up by a close family member violently, 

 

[KSVIRK 4]

Sexism is not really prevalent in Punjabi families. Maybe in Punjab itself but outside Punjab like UK,USA,Canada,etc these so called Sikh girls are being scantily clad,smoking,drinking,clubbing,and being a part of the 'Dil Saaf Jatha'. This doesnt just apply to women. This applies to a lot of super liberal 'Sikh' young adults.These people of the Dil Saaf Jatha are super liberal people who say you dont need to keep kesh,you can do Anand Karaj with a non Sikh,you can drink,smoke and eat halal... all of these things! What frightens me is that even though these kids are commiting bajar kurehits,very few people are doing anything about it! It's time to stop this nonsense!

[puzzled 3,841]

Iv been beaten by my dad as a teenager   while my sister has never had a hand layed on her face.

Asian women complaining of sexism in the west is a joke.

There are more asian women at universities and professional careers than asian men, asian women are more sexually liberated now than ever before, and aranged marriages are fast disappearing.   What else do you want? 

Women complain just for the sake of complaing   its habit,   oh no I'm being sexist now! 

[dallysingh101 1,952]

My moms gave me and my siblings a fair few lickings over the years (some deserved, some not), should I put this down to a rampant anti-male matriarchy at play?

Of all ethnic minorities in the west apneean seem to have the most freedom? I know this varies from family to family, but I'd meet plenty of 'liberated' apneean out and about, that's when I used to get out and about myself. They usually weren't behaving too well either. 

I don't know if it is because I'm older now and not out as much, but I don't see the mouthy, trashy types around as much as I used to (which was pretty frequently). Maybe people have learnt? Or maybe I just don't see it now?

 

That all being said: Females should be respected, and never abused. But we shouldn't ignore the way a helluva lot of apneean appear to find themselves embroiled in some really bad situations like getting groomed, or just being cheaply used and abused by blokes. 

[MisterrSingh 4,760]

6 hours ago, dallysingh101 said:

That all being said: Females should be respected...

For existing?

[Not2Cool2Argue 603]

1 hour ago, MisterrSingh said:

For existing?

Well of course. It is a more moral and noble thing to respect someone just for existing than to demean them for existing. Which has been the attitude toward women in india for many centuries.

 

[MisterrSingh 4,760]

2 hours ago, Not2Cool2Argue said:

Well of course. It is a more moral and noble thing to respect someone just for existing than to demean them for existing. Which has been the attitude toward women in india for many centuries.

 

No.

Respect is earned, not distributed without merit like sweets. It is neither moral nor noble to do what you're suggesting. The opposite of not respecting somebody IS NOT demeaning them.

I view it as, "Wait and observe." Making the leap from not respecting somebody to the extreme of lambasting them or wrapping a cricket bat around their head, is what short-sighted, excitable third worlders do. The middle way of allowing them to display if they are in fact worth respecting is the only sensible route. Otherwise, just avoid and move on.

[Ranjeet01 2,096]

1 hour ago, MisterrSingh said:

No.

Respect is earned, not distributed without merit like sweets. It is neither moral nor noble to do what you're suggesting. The opposite of not respecting somebody IS NOT demeaning them.

I view it as, "Wait and observe." Making the leap from not respecting somebody to the extreme of lambasting them or wrapping a cricket bat around their head, is what short-sighted, excitable third worlders do. The middle way of allowing them to display if they are in fact worth respecting is the only sensible route. Otherwise, just avoid and move on.

Y'all must respec Whamen!

[MisterrSingh 4,760]

9 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

Y'all must respec Whamen!

Preach, girl!

[puzzled 3,841]

49 minutes ago, Ranjeet01 said:

Y'all must respec Whamen!

LMAO 

[dallysingh101 1,952]

8 hours ago, MisterrSingh said:

For existing?

I hear what you're saying about people earning respect, but to withhold it until some 'test' is passed is problematic in itself. 

[MisterrSingh 4,760]

15 minutes ago, dallysingh101 said:

I hear what you're saying about people earning respect, but to withhold it until some 'test' is passed is problematic in itself. 

No, it's not even that, and you make it sound like "test" is a pejorative. As for problematic, that's a worryingly Marxist term that's white noise to me.

  Usually, adjudging someone's demeanour and the way they carry themselves and in the manner they interact with others, is enough to get a accurate handle on whether someone is worth the respect being potentially doled out. It's rarely, if anything, to do with appearance for obvious reasons. This can happen at a distance if a person is capable of reading signals.

I don't leave my house in the morning under the assumption that every human being I encounter will be wort the effort just because they're alive. Withholding respect in the absence of any redeemable qualities usually entails, for me, keeping my distance and ensuring contact is eliminated or kept to a minimum at best. It's not being mean, aggressive, rude, or even generating an atmosphere of unspoken tension where it becomes obvious something is "up". On the subject of women, there's a whole other aspect of considerations that need to be taken into account when interacting with them in this day and age.

[Ranjeet01 2,096]

I think the correct term is being corteous rather than respect 

[dallysingh101 1,952]

55 minutes ago, MisterrSingh said:

No, it's not even that, and you make it sound like "test" is a pejorative. As for problematic, that's a worryingly Marxist term that's white noise to me.

  Usually, adjudging someone's demeanour and the way they carry themselves and in the manner they interact with others, is enough to get a accurate handle on whether someone is worth the respect being potentially doled out. It's rarely, if anything, to do with appearance for obvious reasons. This can happen at a distance if a person is capable of reading signals.

I don't leave my house in the morning under the assumption that every human being I encounter will be wort the effort just because they're alive. Withholding respect in the absence of any redeemable qualities usually entails, for me, keeping my distance and ensuring contact is eliminated or kept to a minimum at best. It's not being mean, aggressive, rude, or even generating an atmosphere of unspoken tension where it becomes obvious something is "up".

I hear you, but the reality is that we have a wide range of personalities within our panth (as every other community), we are compelled to deal with that. Not every female in our community or even family might behave how we feel is worthy of respect, that's obvious. But until they demonstrate otherwise, you have to give a benefit of the doubt. And even then, what would you do with some teenager who isn't behaving exactly how you feel is right in your family, or even an older women? Alienating and castigating them harshly clearly hasn't worked in the past and created even worse problems we are all aware of.  Maybe because I've worked with lots of teenagers over the years and seen the reality of varying behaviour, I'm seeing it different to you. You might be able to distance yourself from a certain type you meet socially or at work, but do blokes have that choice when it is closer to home?

 

Quote

On the subject of women, there's a whole other aspect of considerations that need to be taken into account when interacting with them in this day and age.

If you're saying this, I don't know what we are 'arguing about'? CP even states that women's behaviour can be complex and sometimes even unintentionally self sabotaging. 

You know certain people have already created some myth of the inherently misogynist ethnic man. You know they are ready to pounce on that stereotype despite their own shortcomings in this department (like ignoring mass grooming all over the country despite trying to portray themselves as some noble protectors of females).  

[Not2Cool2Argue 603]

8 hours ago, MisterrSingh said:

No.

Respect is earned, not distributed without merit like sweets. It is neither moral nor noble to do what you're suggesting. The opposite of not respecting somebody IS NOT demeaning them.

I view it as, "Wait and observe." Making the leap from not respecting somebody to the extreme of lambasting them or wrapping a cricket bat around their head, is what short-sighted, excitable third worlders do. The middle way of allowing them to display if they are in fact worth respecting is the only sensible route. Otherwise, just avoid and move on.

Yes. 

Women have been considered lowly creatures of low intelligence, morals, and hygiene for centuries. To change culture at a massive scale, hyperbole and pendulum swings are needed before a balanced view comes into being. So praising women for being women and respecting women in general is needed. Respect for individuals can be withheld 

People think it's a tragedy that feminism is winning, that women have more rights in divorces, more women are graduating from college than men, media portrays women as leaders, sensible with men as comedic characters,  affirmative action for women etc. 

It's not a tragedy, its justice or even karma. Let women rise so high they become oppressive. Then balance will then be restored. Unless it swings the other way and we are back to patriarchy. But it takes a few swings of the pendulum before things settle down. 

As happened with democracy and monarchy in France.