What is the right age to get married?

[Suchi]

39 minutes ago, Jacfsing2 said:

Eh, you judge Muslims for doing stuff against Islam, but you don’t say the same about Sikhs doing stuff against Sikhi and say it’s their choice. You also don’t seem very consistent throughout your posts on this thread from going from the Dutch man being a stranger you talk to, to saying you don’t talk to him anymore, and now most recently you are saying he’s your bf. 

I'm beginning to wonder if Dutch man really exists. Seems to all be a bit of a fantasy novel designed to keep us entertained. 

[Premi5]

Somewhat related...

https://www.asianimage.co.uk/columnists/dearmassi/19788676.dear-massi-thinking-calling-wedding-off-keeps-pouting/

• Columnists
• Dear Massi

7 hrs ago

Dear Massi, I am thinking of calling the wedding off as she keeps ‘pouting’

By Massi

 

 

Dear Massi, I am thinking of calling the wedding off as she keeps ‘pouting’

 

 

Dear Massi, I have been meeting someone for some months and we get on well. 

We have taken things slowly are comfortable in each other’s company but are now looking to get married.

I went to meet her sisters recently and when we were at the restaurant they all got up together and started taking selfies. All of them were pouting and it really put me off. People were watching and I got embarrassed. 

I just can’t stop thinking about it now.I know she likes to post selfies but I have not noticed how she pouts? I also noticed that one of her friends has had bigger lips than before. Has she got lip-fillers? I don’t know I am afraid to ask? 

I know people might think I am being a little strange but this is really bothering me. We do get on and she is a good person. The wedding is the last thing on my mind at the moment as I can’t get over the pouting.

Massi says, If this is something that bothers you then you are better being honest right now rather than later. 

 

It may be something that does out of habit or only with her friends. 

I understand it is difficult conversation to bring up at this stage when two people are still getting to know one another. But it will be better to speak up about these things otherwise they will be left to fester and could affect how you both are towards one another later in life.

Is her pouting bothering you so much that you are willing to call the wedding off? You did say that you both get on and you seem to be comfortable in her company?

Maybe try to see this is as a minor gripe and not something that should cause you make a drastic decision in life. As she may well at this stage have noticed things about you that she is too polite to bring up.

[Not2Cool2Argue]

On 12/10/2021 at 6:22 AM, GurjantGnostic said:

That being said watch out for this. This is real. There's a converse as well of course. It is said that marriage in Kalyug is under the pervue of Saitan lol, so I'd suggest Anand Karaj and be careful it's Anand Karaj you're doing, not getting married. I would in fact not use the word married. Be careful you don't go for Anand Karaj and get married instead. Also don't go for Rishta and start dating in your mind either. Have your requirments and if they are met by who you trust to see they're met, that's it basically. No dating through the Rishta process. Bad. 

What do you mean by anand karaj. How is different than marriage? 

[GurjantGnostic]

3 hours ago, Not2Cool2Argue said:

What do you mean by anand karaj. How is different than marriage? 

Quick answer. Anand Karaj is to further your spiritual developement as a Gursikh, with your fellow soul bride, to achieve Mukte. It is under the pervue of the Paanth spiritually.

Marriage is primarily a legal construct based on the back of older cultural and religous practices where two peope marry each other under the pervue of saitan, according to Gurbani. 

 

[Jacfsing2]

2 minutes ago, GurjantGnostic said:

Quick answer. Anand Karaj is to further your spiritual developement as a Gursikh, with your fellow soul bride, to achieve Mukte. It is under the pervue of the Paanth spiritually.

Marriage is primarily a legal construct based on the back of older cultural and religous practices where two peope marry each other under the pervue of saitan, according to Gurbani. 

I don't think government marriage means anything, probably more of a disadvantage if you're a guy.

[GurjantGnostic]

1 minute ago, Jacfsing2 said:

I don't think government marriage means anything, probably more of a disadvantage if you're a guy.

Yup. Zero legal or personal reasons for it. 

[Jassu]

Yes the Dutch guy is real & he wants me to move to the Netherlands. But I realised he is only saying things I want to hear I don’t think he’s going to convert to Sikhi. So i don’t think I can be in a relationship with him. He is kind of obsessed with me but that is also my fault because I didn’t stop him and I faltered in my beliefs. Also I told him that I liked him too and I would have liked to be his gf which was wrong of me. 

He’s wealthy, he’s 6’4, he has a good job and he wants to make 4+ children with me. haha lol sounds weird

I guess I could post screenshots of our conversations for proof but I don’t want to expose him, also it kind of feels wrong. I think he’s just more physically attracted to me and it will just end quickly so Idk.

btw this is my first ‘relationship ‘ if I actually meet him 

[Jassu]

Like I never had any Sikh/Punjabi guys obsessed with me but this man is obsessed with me and gives me a lot of attention.

[Jacfsing2]

12 minutes ago, Jassu said:

Yes the Dutch guy is real & he wants me to move to the Netherlands. But I realised he is only saying things I want to hear I don’t think he’s going to convert to Sikhi. So i don’t think I can be in a relationship with him. He is kind of obsessed with me but that is also my fault because I didn’t stop him and I faltered in my beliefs. Also I told him that I liked him too and I would have liked to be his gf which was wrong of me. 

He’s wealthy, he’s 6’4, he has a good job and he wants to make 4+ children with me. haha lol sounds weird

I guess I could post screenshots of our conversations for proof but I don’t want to expose him, also it kind of feels wrong. I think he’s just more physically attracted to me and it will just end quickly so Idk.

btw this is my first ‘relationship ‘ if I actually meet him 

If you are genuine, I’m going to say that you should be extremely cautious of what people say online especially if you’ve never seen someone irl, they can say the perfect words but act completely different, with wrong intentions. 

12 minutes ago, Jassu said:

Like I never had any Sikh/Punjabi guys obsessed with me but this man is obsessed with me and gives me a lot of attention.

A man who’s high value should never be obsessed with a woman even his own wife. 

[Jassu]

Just now, Jacfsing2 said:

If you are genuine, I’m going to say that you should be extremely cautious of what people say online especially if you’ve never seen someone irl, they can say the perfect words but act completely different, with wrong intentions. 

A man who’s high value should never be obsessed with a woman even his own wife. 

Oh yeah I think he is kind of weird at times to be so obsessed with me even though I rejected him sometimes (like I straight up told him it’s impossible for me to be his gf). But I’m kind of attached to him. He is really kind and talks to me about issues. He also doesn’t like Muslims and we joked together that one day Muslims will be gathering in the streets and saying let’s kill/convert whitey and he said you’re a Sikh you’re supposed to protect meeee lol. He is really cute sometimes. I told him I’d be lonely in the Netherlands if I were to go there since I don’t know anyone and he said don’t worry I work from home and you’ll always have me to cuddle with and you can read your Sikh history and teach me about it too and that he’ll help me go to university in the Netherlands lol. He even offered to come to Manc when I said I’d be uncomfortable going to Amsterdam alone.

But yeah it’s kind of a red flag that he acts so perfect and understanding. Well, that’s what sucks about the internet.