Physical Appearance Of Your Partner [mature Topic]

[B4ND4]

I guess we are going off topic here. I knw times have changed and knowing u'r potential partner b4 marriage is a must. I would prefer that too but only with the involvement of elders.

The purpose of the thread was something diff. and i guess we all know the answers as to why we can't see some physically challenged person as our partner.

Chalo Guru Kirpa karan.. summaat bakshan :lol:

[JustME]

I guess we are going off topic here. I knw times have changed and knowing u'r potential partner b4 marriage is a must. I would prefer that too but only with the involvement of elders.

The purpose of the thread was something diff. and i guess we all know the answers as to why we can't see some physically challenged person as our partner.

Chalo Guru Kirpa karan.. summaat bakshan :lol:

going back to the origional topic wot if u married someone and after marriage they became physically/mentally challenged? would u then leave that person?

this is an interesting topic but not many seem to be giving a direct response...................

for its the same as finding someone of this calibare before marriage if u can do it after marriage then why not before?

for me physical appearance is attachment..........if i could go back i would have had a aranged marraige and gone whenever folks sent me... ...cos this jeeven is ALL hukam............im seriously begininning to doubt this "free will" business............... everything is hukam then we marry when Waheguru tells us.......................so either way we dont realy have a say in it.............

[Medallion Stallion]

for me physical appearance is attachment..........if i could go back i would have had a aranged marraige and gone whenever folks sent me... :lol: ...cos this jeeven is ALL hukam............im seriously begininning to doubt this "free will" business............... everything is hukam then we marry when Waheguru tells us.......................so either way we dont realy have a say in it.............

I think that people want to marry someone on their level and if something happens after marriage then would probably deal with that together..........just y thoughts.

[B4ND4]

this is an interesting topic but not many seem to be giving a direct response...................

:lol: Coz most of us are just good at talkin... no direct response has actually answered the question. Shows how shallow we really are.

[Heera Singh]

i gave a direct answer to the question...

[GABROO KHALISTAN DAH]

man to many people acting to gangstah...

ie. the only reason i want to get married is spiritual support.

buddd we're humans, and meant to live as humans, guru ji has given us a path to which we walk along. but we must also use that path to be humans, and part of it is enjoying LIFE.

[Bored]

fat ppl shud loose weigh !

share with the poor wat u dont need damit

u gotta b fit...b ready to battle ....yeye!!

we got the fattest ppl on earth

eat all that butter and wat not

cholesterol!

wat rehit are u following?

a eating contest?

[Pheena]

Been doing some thinking about this and i fail to get proper reasons behind that. Why is it that everyone barring a few individuals can't or don't marry somone whom thy find not so fit for them based on the person's physical roop??

Ik passe we advocate that this body is nthg te dujje passe we can't imagine ourselves being widout someone who is not a proper match for us?? why is that... is this hypocrisy?? Is that our weakness??

This question has been playing with my mind for sometime now and i dont see any answers :lol: . There were times when ppl married where their parents finallized everythg but those marriages were based on many factors aswell looks being one of em. What i dont understand is why dont i see our parents approving such matches?? what is itttttttttt?? Is this all fake?? All the sikhi talks seems so fake to me whn i think of this issue

Plzzzzzzzz share u'r views

I think its important to take into note that our mind discriminates based on its natural/karmic development and beauty of an individual is always a subjective matter. I might consider someone to be very beautiful, but another might not. Does that mean that the other person is wrong or I am right?

For Example, just as we are inclined to be attracted to one color more than others, one shape, size more than others etc, similarly our mind might find the features of someone attractive and others not so much. Do you have a Favorite color? Do you have a Favorite Car, Food item?

Do you eat everything you are given or do you prefer a single item more than others? If you do like one daal or sabji or food item over another then you are using the Mind to prefer one taste over another. Just as the mind is attracted to one face over another. So if you can say that we should see everyone equally regardless of what others look like and enforce this with Spiritual Giaan then you have to equally use this Giaan towards everything else. Then all colors are beautiful, all food tastes good, all faces, shapes and sizes are beautiful.

Now certainly this can be taken to the extreme of physical attachments of wanting a supermodel wife/husband. These are obvious issues of the shallow mind, but let us not ignore our natural tendencies to be attracted and to pursue that which attracts us. Until and unless you go do not go beyond the mind and its dualities, we will continue to discriminate based on the preference of mind's development. Its not about what issues (looks or colors or food) are small and what are bigger concerns. The point is that we use our mind to discriminate, to like and dislike, this duality itself is the mind. To get to the root of the issue you have to first deal with the duality of the mind. When there are 2, there will always be a conflict.

Personally, I want to marry someone who I find attractive and who find me attractive. Being attractive to someone is not bad nor is trying to find someone who you are attractive to.

[Medallion Stallion]

there must be more to it than looks......you could be with someone who is the most prettiest in the world with the most tiny waist or with someone who has a great six pack BUT it doesnt mean they are as good on the inside as they look on the outside!

[B4ND4]

The point is that we use our mind to discriminate, to like and dislike, this duality itself is the mind. To get to the root of the issue you have to first deal with the duality of the mind. When there are 2, there will always be a conflict.

Personally, I want to marry someone who I find attractive and who find me attractive. Being attractive to someone is not bad nor is trying to find someone who you are attractive to.

You said you'll marry someone who you find attractive. Does that mean you won't marry a person who is unattractive to you? So am i right in assuming that you are discriminating too? There is duality in your mind aswell?

How would you get married...Through parents/elders or would you find a person yourself? If your parents find a match for you (they find the person attractive and having sikh values) but you dont find her/him attractive, would you say NO to the rishta?? Would you tell them the true reasons for saying NO??