Lust N How To Get Rid Of It

[Prem]

Getting rid of sexual desire is impossible and leads to unhappiness and repression. We have to channel sexual desire into a healthy and loving relationship - which is why Sikhi says we should marry and love our partner. The point is not to let lust rule you and distract you from acting a good life. It means not being promiscuous. It means knowing the value of sexual love as an expression of love for our life partners.

Sikhi is a pragmatic religion - it has never demanded chastity as other religions have. Denial of the sexual impulse can lead to misery, neurosis, psychological damage, and ultimately can lead to repression which can burst out later in life - look at the scandals that hit the Catholic Church.

Guruji knew all this - it is why he says to get married and have a good relationship with your husband or wife. Sikhs are not to live outside the world - they are to live in society as full human beings and sexuality is a part of our human life. We must control and channel it - but we must not seek to destroy it.

[Balwinder Kaur]

Getting rid of sexual desire is impossible and leads to unhappiness and repression. We have to channel sexual desire into a healthy and loving relationship - which is why Sikhi says we should marry and love our partner. The point is not to let lust rule you and distract you from acting a good life. It means not being promiscuous. It means knowing the value of sexual love as an expression of love for our life partners.

Sikhi is a pragmatic religion - it has never demanded chastity as other religions have. Denial of the sexual impulse can lead to misery, neurosis, psychological damage, and ultimately can lead to repression which can burst out later in life - look at the scandals that hit the Catholic Church.

Guruji knew all this - it is why he says to get married and have a good relationship with your husband or wife. Sikhs are not to live outside the world - they are to live in society as full human beings and sexuality is a part of our human life. We must control and channel it - but we must not seek to destroy it.

118133[/snapback]

yes.

[gupt_paapi]

Getting rid of sexual desire is impossible and leads to unhappiness and repression. We have to channel sexual desire into a healthy and loving relationship - which is why Sikhi says we should marry and love our partner. The point is not to let lust rule you and distract you from acting a good life. It means not being promiscuous. It means knowing the value of sexual love as an expression of love for our life partners.

Sikhi is a pragmatic religion - it has never demanded chastity as other religions have. Denial of the sexual impulse can lead to misery, neurosis, psychological damage, and ultimately can lead to repression which can burst out later in life - look at the scandals that hit the Catholic Church.

Guruji knew all this - it is why he says to get married and have a good relationship with your husband or wife. Sikhs are not to live outside the world - they are to live in society as full human beings and sexuality is a part of our human life. We must control and channel it - but we must not seek to destroy it.

118133[/snapback]

yes.

118134[/snapback]

fanx :wub:

[DivineJourney]

Neuton's Law "Energy can neighther be created Nor be destroyed" but only can change forms..and we have to work towards "Transforming" it into Love. and when we are able to fullly transformed into love..then the 'Enlightenment' happens. and we have to learn from the past that it had been possible in the past n if has happend in the past it can happend wid us too....

"TIME IS CERTINALY SHORT BUT IT IS ENUFF TO BE ENLIGHTENED"

So let us give our sincere effort towards being Enlightened......meditation is the key to it...

[DhadiMania]

Singho, shehat aap nu patha hai that someone replied in the gupt section to say he had a bad problem on kaam. i tried to post some points and suggestions, but as i got typing, i realised i was going to post in the wrong thread!

so i tried going back to the gupt section, but thanks to the wonderful admins of the site, i am not allowed to post in that thread :wub:

so, now i decided to put this in response to "HELP_ME" question.

gustaphi maaf

simran is not just the answer, you also have to consider the sangat your in. now you see, the classic formula of sangat is this.....

the following is in regards to finding good sangat

breaking up with bad sangat by ending a relationship + going gurdwara more regularly = a very happy chappy who does not have a serious problem

but....

mixing with bad sangat and refusing not to end a relationship = a damsel in distress.

now, obviously if your inner circle are the ones that tempt you to be like this, its going to be very very very hard to give up watching it all. but what you can do is this, try distancing yourself away from them. of course talk to them to some extent, but dont whatever you do buy the porn off them. no matter how tempting it is, a straight no.

i assume that your main source of porn is the internet, because if it was on tv, your mum and dad would have given you a joothe and that should have set you straight :wub: .

eitherway, make sure you bring your computer from yuor room downstairs to where your family is normally. you can do your work in front of them. always do whatever you wantto do in your day in front of your parents, one little moment away from them can be the time when you get tempted.

try having a quick cold shower whenever you can. that makes you not think of kaam (from what i have gathered this is the reason why people back in the days of the gurus said its important to have a cold ishnaan? not sure on that one). dont spend too long in the shower, 5 minutes, in, then out.

but the point is, you ought to be doing everything in your parents hajaree. it may be disgusting that we have our tempations, but what cans et one straight easily is if you do your work downstairs with your parents watching.

gustaphi maaf

[randip singh]

Singho, shehat aap nu patha hai that someone replied in the gupt section to say he had a bad problem on kaam. i tried to post some points and suggestions, but as i got typing, i realised i was going to post in the wrong thread! 

so i tried going back to the gupt section, but thanks to the wonderful admins of the site, i am not allowed to post in that thread  :wub:

so, now i decided to put this in response to "HELP_ME" question.

gustaphi maaf

simran is not just the answer, you also have to consider the sangat your in. now you see, the classic formula of sangat is this.....

the following is in regards to finding good sangat

breaking up with bad sangat by ending a relationship + going gurdwara more regularly = a very happy chappy who does not have a serious problem

but....

mixing with bad sangat and refusing not to end a relationship = a damsel in distress.

now, obviously if your inner circle are the ones that tempt you to be like this, its going to be very very very hard to give up watching it all. but what you can do is this, try distancing yourself away from them. of course talk to them to some extent, but dont whatever you do buy the porn off them. no matter how tempting it is, a straight no.

i assume that your main source of porn is the internet, because if it was on tv, your mum and dad would have given you a joothe and that should have set you straight  :wub: .

eitherway, make sure you bring your computer from yuor room downstairs to where your family is normally. you can do your work in front of them. always do whatever you wantto do in your day in front of your parents, one little moment away from them can be the time when you get tempted.

try having a quick cold shower whenever you can.  that makes you not think of kaam (from what i have gathered this is the reason why people back in the days of the gurus said its important to have a cold ishnaan? not sure on that one). dont spend too long in the shower, 5 minutes, in, then out.

but the point is, you ought to be doing everything in your parents hajaree. it may be disgusting that we have our tempations, but what cans et one straight easily is if you do your work downstairs with your parents watching.

gustaphi maaf

118240[/snapback]

Kandola me old fruiy. How's it going.

I disagree with what you are saying. See what Prem, me and divine journey has written.

Kaam is lust with is an unhealth obsession with sex. The key here being obsession, and it should be you as an individual (with the help of waheguru), dealing with this obsession. When I say you, I don't mean you in partciular, but an an individual. Don't be relyiong on others for what you should be dealing with internally.

We all have thoughts about sex (its natural), but the unhealthy obsession with them in unanatural and takes you away from humanity, and that is what Kaam is.

Let me give you an example. I see a picture of a naked statue of a woman/man, and think to my self, what a great work of art (or not as the case maybe). The individual obsessed with Kaam will only see it (the statue) as an object of titilation and sexual onsession. So the problem is not with the statue (or as in your case the computer), but the individual viewing the statue (or computer). :wub:

[UntitledSingh]

It seem to me that you guys are saying it is ok to have sex with your partner for recreation, and if that is true then you are probably going to use protection. I dont think that using protection is the Sikh way or the natural way. I doubt men or women used protection when they were first created lol, (I also doubt that men or women cut their hair when they were first created). There is nothing wrong with sex, but what is the purpose of sex? to get pleasure or to create life? If pleaseure is so important then why not turn to drugs, why not use bung(marajuana). I think men and women need to contorl or hold their sexual instincts for when necessary-to create life.

VJKK

VJKF

[S.S.F]

It seem to me that you guys are saying it is ok to have sex with your partner for recreation, and if that is true then you are probably going to use protection. I dont think that using protection is the Sikh way or the natural way. I doubt men or women used protection when they were first created lol, (I also doubt that men or women cut their hair when they were first created). There is nothing wrong with sex, but what is the purpose of sex?  to get pleasure or to create life? If pleaseure is so important then why not turn to drugs, why not use bung(marajuana). I think men and women need to contorl or hold their sexual instincts for when necessary-to create life.

VJKK

VJKF

132525[/snapback]

yh true :TH:

[Pheena]

I think Prem said it best.

also here is something that relates to his post:

Once I was on a journey and someone asked me which word in a man's vocabulary was the most valuable. My reply was, "Love". The man was surprised. He said he had expected me to answer "soul" or

"God". I laughed and said, "Love is God."

Raising on the ray of love one can enter the enlightened kingdom of God. It is better to say that love is God than to say that truth is God, because the harmony, the beauty, the vitality and the bliss that are part of love are not part of truth. Truth is to be known; love is to be felt as well as known. The growth and perfection of love lead to the ultimate merger with God.

The greatest poverty of all is the absence of love. The man who has not developed the capacity to love lives in a private hell of his own. A man who is filled with love is in heaven. You can look at man as a wonderful and unique plant, a plant that is capable of producing both nectar and poison. If a man lives by hate he reaps a harvest of poison; if he lives by love he gathers blossoms laden with nectar.

If I mold my life and live it with the well-being of all men in mind, that is love. Love results from the awareness that you are not separate, not different from anything else in existence. I am in you; you are in me. This love is religious. The doors of love only open for the person who is prepared to let his ego go. To surrender one's ego for someone else is love; to surrender one's ego for all is divine love.

Love is not sexual passion. Those who mistake sex for love remain empty of love. Sex is only a passing manifestation of love. It is part of nature's mechanism, a method of procreation. Love exists on a higher plane, and as love grows, sex dissipates. The energy that has been manifested in sex is transformed into love.

Love is the creative refinement of sex energy. And so, when love reaches perfection, the absence of sex automatically follows. A life of love, an abstinence from physical pleasures is called brahmacharya, and anyone who wishes to be free from sex must develop his capacity to love. Freedom from sex cannot be achieved through supression. Liberation from sex is only possible through love.

I have said that love is God. This is the ultimate truth. But let me say as well that love also exists within the family unit. This is the first step on the journey to love, and the ultimate can never happen if the beginning has been absent. Love is responsible for the existence of the family and when the family unit moves apart and its members spread out into society, love increases and grows. When a man's family has finally grown to incorporate all of mankind, his love becomes one with God.

Without love man is an individual, an ego. He has no family; he has no link with other people. This is gradual death. Life, on the other hand, is interrelation.

Love surpasses the duality of the ego. This alone is truth. The man who thirsts for truth must first develop his capacity to love—to the point where the difference between the lover and the beloved disappears and only love remains.

When the light of love is freed from the duality of lover and the beloved, when it is freed from the haze of seer and seen, when only the light of pure love shines brightly, that is freedom and liberation.

I urge all men to strive for that supreme freedom.

[UntitledSingh]

Very true, many people mistake the word sex with love, but love is so much higher.