Sikh Girls Marrying Muslim Boys

[JagsawSingh]

I know of quite a few well educated Amritdhari couples that are professionals , so I am not sure at what extent the amritdhari population is uneducated. You are making them sound as if they are like the ultra - orthodox jews.

Thats why I used words like "alot" and "most" rather than "all". Of course some highly educated ones exist. Even some Sikh astronauts exist but that doesn't mean most of us work for NASA. Where you've gone wrong then Ranjeet, is that you've got yourself so bogged down on the issue of semantics and numbers you haven't been able to comprehend the actual point.

[Ranjeet01]

Thats why I used words like "alot" and "most" rather than "all". Of course some highly educated ones exist. Even some Sikh astronauts exist but that doesn't mean most of us work for NASA. Where you've gone wrong then Ranjeet, is that you've got yourself so bogged down on the issue of semantics and numbers you haven't been able to comprehend the actual point.

No Jagsaw I got your point, and I agree that maybe there is an issue with education with perhaps a segment of the Amritdhari population but I find that using the word "most" or "almost" can generalise and builds unnecessary stereotypes.

[Quantavius]

I fail to see the connection between education and wanting marry your own. I don't get it. "I'm a neurosurgeon so now I'm more interested in marrying my own"....I just don't see that. In fact what I've witnessed is the complete opposite. It's the educated ones that have tasted freedom and now have money due to education that marry outside.

The usual scenario, Sikh parents sends their daughter overseas and she comes back with a degree, a job overseas and a husband who isn't a Punjabi.

[Big_Tera]

can we really stop these threads?? this has been discussed enough. It happens but we need to concentrate on the many good Sikh girls out there. not the ones that will disrespect their faith, family, community ect for an ahmed.

who cares about them. those people are best out of our religion. let them go we dont need them.

Lets face it

muslim girl will not go with a non muslim because she will get killed by her parents

a sikh girl will go with a non sikh because there are no repercussions. at worst she will get a telling off and then convince her parents to come to the temple to marry her off to the muslim. these girls can wrap their fingers around their parents. as I said many of these girls are only childs or the eldest. hence the sikh parents just go along with it as they have no choice. because they only have two kids hence they do everything for them and dont want to hurt their chidren. mean while these muslim predators get away with it.

[simran345]

I fail to see the connection between education and wanting marry your own. I don't get it. "I'm a neurosurgeon so now I'm more interested in marrying my own"....I just don't see that. In fact what I've witnessed is the complete opposite. It's the educated ones that have tasted freedom and now have money due to education that marry outside.

The usual scenario, Sikh parents sends their daughter overseas and she comes back with a degree, a job overseas and a husband who isn't a Punjabi.

Agree with this, education has got nothing to do with it. It's lack of love for Sikhi that is the problem, and lack of respect for parents. I too have seen the more educated is the more they class themselves as having more choice and choosing to love who they want regardless of taking into consideration their religion. I know love cannot be forced or one cannot choose who to fall in love with but these people do have the choice of learning about their own faith which they can't be bothered to do.

[DailyMail]

Jagsaw,

This is probably one of your best responses by far. On any thread.

I'm from down the road from you, the other side of the borough, and I noticed this trend especially in Hounslow around the mid 90's and it has continued. The Sikhs attracted to amrit were the less academic. You're correct about institutional "uneducatedness", anti-scholar, anti-evidence base, anti-debate, anti-academic theme that runs through many jathebandi's and gurdwarae. It's a case of "let's follow the baba" - not the guru's, who encouraged debate.

As a medic, I can recognise what you say about medical placements and muslims. I saw first hand how some Sikh girls were drawn to them, and other non-Sikhs. This may shatter the illusion of some on this forum, but these Sikh girls were not groomed, or from broken homes, or single-parent families or otherwise vulnerable. In fact, the opposite was true, the crème de la crème as the French would say.

As you say, there is a huge strata of Sikh women who are not amritdhari but not clueless about Sikhi either, they are academically superior to many of the men, particularly the amritdhari cohort, and they reach their mid to late twenties in ratios far greater than men in terms of professional occupations and look around and wonder.....where are the amritdhari barristers, the amritdhari surgeons, the amritdhari chartered accountants etc. Unable to find them, this leads to socialising amongst certain circles and marriage in certain circles.

The amritdhari men need to up their (academic) game.

[MisterrSingh]

1. Stop telling moneh and moniyah that they aren't Sikhs and that they're apostates destined for hell. Treat them like brothers and sisters like things use to be back in the 70's, 80's, and 90's, not to hoodwink them into Gursikhi, but because it's the right thing to do, and observe how the prem for their fellow Sikhs and Sikhi grows in their hearts when they aren't treated like they're surplus to requirements. Lead by example. The rest is on them.

2. Take your cues from Gurbani. Prioritise Man over Guru Sahib at your peril. If not, we deserve everything negative that happens to us in the context of this issue. Stop this worship of anyone who rocks up to a stage and says a few agreeable words to stroke your agenda and your ego. Your Baba or your paracharak will not be with you when your time is up; he won't be standing on the Other Side putting in a good word for you; you're on your own.

Probably a gross over-simplification of what needs to be done, but it's a start.

[Big_Tera]

1. Stop telling moneh and moniyah that they aren't Sikhs and that they're apostates destined for hell. Treat them like brothers and sisters like things use to be back in the 70's, 80's, and 90's, not to hoodwink them into Gursikhi, but because it's the right thing to do, and observe how the prem for their fellow Sikhs and Sikhi grows in their hearts when they aren't treated like they're surplus to requirements. Lead by example. The rest is on them.

2. Take your cues from Gurbani. Prioritise Man over Guru Sahib at your peril. If not, we deserve everything negative that happens to us in the context of this issue. Stop this worship of anyone who rocks up to a stage and says a few agreeable words to stroke your agenda and your ego. Your Baba or your paracharak will not be with you when your time is up; he won't be standing on the Other Side putting in a good word for you; you're on your own.

Probably a gross over-simplification of what needs to be done, but it's a start.

Why would sikh women medical students be drawn to muslim medical students? Thats where the problem lies. girls only develop feelings for a male when she spend long periods with that male. the question is why are they spending so much time with muslims in the first place. the fact of the matter they have not been taught properly by the parents about respect. Muslim girls have by their parents hence . they never go with a non muslims even though they could.

[Ranjeet01]

Jagsaw,

This is probably one of your best responses by far. On any thread.

I'm from down the road from you, the other side of the borough, and I noticed this trend especially in Hounslow around the mid 90's and it has continued. The Sikhs attracted to amrit were the less academic. You're correct about institutional "uneducatedness", anti-scholar, anti-evidence base, anti-debate, anti-academic theme that runs through many jathebandi's and gurdwarae. It's a case of "let's follow the baba" - not the guru's, who encouraged debate.

As a medic, I can recognise what you say about medical placements and muslims. I saw first hand how some Sikh girls were drawn to them, and other non-Sikhs. This may shatter the illusion of some on this forum, but these Sikh girls were not groomed, or from broken homes, or single-parent families or otherwise vulnerable. In fact, the opposite was true, the crème de la crème as the French would say.

As you say, there is a huge strata of Sikh women who are not amritdhari but not clueless about Sikhi either, they are academically superior to many of the men, particularly the amritdhari cohort, and they reach their mid to late twenties in ratios far greater than men in terms of professional occupations. These leads to socialising amongst certain circles and marriage in certain circles.

The amritdhari men need to up their (academic) game.

I think our culture puts people who are more "academically superior" on a pedestal.

Education impacts males and females in different ways. An academically superior male can marry a less academic female but for an academic superior female it's harder to marry a less academic male as social status and hypergamy takes precedent.

[Balkaar]

1. Stop telling moneh and moniyah that they aren't Sikhs and that they're apostates destined for hell. Treat them like brothers and sisters like things use to be back in the 70's, 80's, and 90's, not to hoodwink them into Gursikhi, but because it's the right thing to do, and observe how the prem for their fellow Sikhs and Sikhi grows in their hearts when they aren't treated like they're surplus to requirements. Lead by example. The rest is on them.

Exactly.

There's barely 30 million Sikhs in the world, and half of them are determined to have the other half branded apostates and reduce that number further still...

It happens but we need to concentrate on the many good Sikh girls out there. not the ones that will disrespect their faith, family, community ect for an ahmed.

... and others seem perfectly happy to bid good riddance to wayward Sikh children who wish to marry into Islam, a religion whose adherents outnumber us 50 times over.

Big Tera Veerji, there simply aren't enough of us that we can afford to lose people without a fight.