Sexual Grooming Methods Revealed

[gsingh12345]

Hope that twats wife one day realises that she got married to a complete <banned word filter activated>.

Yes all sikhs should listen to dasam granth and carry shaster you never know when these scumbags will try it on.

I'm lost for words reading about these cases.

There was a documentary by the sikh awareness society detailing the methods used, all females should be aware of this.

[jkvlondon]

@jkvlondon .... your an inspiration who has come out the other end a stronger person. I hope that you can now live your life the fullist and have put all this in the past thank you for being open about the topic

What I have found is that this violence is so commonplace now that I personally have met around seven ladies who have been through it from all faiths and my open nature has encouraged them to feel safe to share , it is almost like the damaged can feel a like soul out . My eldest son also has this knack to make the people in pain feel safe , it is a blessing I wish we could all cultivate so the healing could really begin for all the families and Girls .

One thing I will say is during my secrecy years I would get mad at all those bollywood propaganda in movies that girls who have been attacked should end it , I was vehemently against such an attitude , this is kurdi maar in another guise, it is NOT the Sikh way, look at our history . How many Bibian were attacked in India over the past decades was it their fault ?

Today rape is used as payback in India for disagreeing with the status quo, to settle feuds, to humble our people, to destroy a bloodline, a tool of warfare used extensively by the Arabs, Africans, Chinese(tibetans) and now even us: we have hit rock bottom. In the eighties it was one on one attacks in the movies , now surprise surprise it is gang rapes they are educating the cowardly how to go about these crimes.

The fault lies in us not empowering the girls by emphasising their bir rass and giving them the mental and physical tools to look after themselves . I remember reading about SInghnian visiting the harem of a muslim king because the Begums were curious about our women and how they were wearing armour carrying full sized arms just like the men, riding and going into the battlefield . We have made our daughters vulnerable because we have not taught them their real roop, their real value , we have not made them familiar with their ancestors, or gurbani and that gap in knowledge has made them an easy target to hoodwink into thinking SIkhi is not so great compared to other paths .

Teach a woman her history , her faith, her bani and you will save countless generations of Gursikhs ...you want sikhi to flourish ? this is what we need to do

[simran345]

I hope you're right.

Sometimes we think that those that have hurt a soul will reap what they sow in next life or not at all, but God may deliver justice quicker than one thinks. There were two separate individuals who wanted me dead for what reason I do not know as I used to be very humble with them, maybe jealousy.But I used to say How do these people get away with such badness and be so nasty as to want to hurt so much.

I really thought well nothing's going to happen this life and I won't see it next life if I come back or not.

But one day one of our relatives told us her husband had got very ill but survived. And the other out of the blue, 5yrs later lost a family member and is now going through the consequences of lies and Hera pheri they did.

I would never wish anything bad on anybody, but at the time it hurt a lot and I felt like ending it all, but somebody I met, I feel God sent as support said to me don't worry they will get what they reap this life, not next. And I kept saying no they won't it's karm de khel next life like I have from my past life have dukh. But he just laughed and said God will do it this life. I thought he was talking nonsense, but he was right God took away from them what they were trying to do with me. And instead of being happy that God delivered justice which I never wanted or expected, I cried for them, it hurt to see the pain they went through. But now I trust Guruji is always there for me be it through bad times even when I think they are not.

jkvlondon penji is right sodhna is always done.

[Big_Tera]

People are reluctant to come forward about it because of the shame, pride etc that is associated with it. I have never spoke to anyone about this or what I went through even though I knew that other people knew. I would still see my friends and they would know what was going on but neither one of us would say anything. In fact, this is the first time ive ever come out about it and even this is behind a screen where nobody knows me ... very difficult to talk about but if people dont talk about it, we will stay blind and this will continue

It good to know that you came through it. It all comes down to trust and naievity. alot of Sikh girls are just not brought up with a strong sence of keeping safe. They are fooled by the flattery of an older person who makes them feel special with false compliments and gifts. Then before they know it they are getting up to all sorts. This is not the fault of the girls but the fault of the perpetrators who hunt girls like predators.

[Cisco_Singh]

One thing trust is not going to change is the "predators", they have always been there, they will continue to be there, they're methods will change but their aims will remain the same

The internet and social media had made their activities much more easier and had made it more difficult for family to keep an eye on their children.

Education and supervision is key, keep a very close eye on the technology and gadgets you give children, keep regular dialogue and communication with them.

But ultimately to be blackmailed you have allowed yourself to be manipulated into such a situation in the first place, people have to take accountability for their own actions, these are not one sided " predator" "victim" stories.

[jkvlondon]

One thing trust is not going to change is the "predators", they have always been there, they will continue to be there, they're methods will change but their aims will remain the same

The internet and social media had made their activities much more easier and had made it more difficult for family to keep an eye on their children.

Education and supervision is key, keep a very close eye on the technology and gadgets you give children, keep regular dialogue and communication with them.

But ultimately to be blackmailed you have allowed yourself to be manipulated into such a situation in the first place, people have to take accountability for their own actions, these are not one sided " predator" "victim" stories.

there are a spectrum of scenarios mine was a one off attack which left me in a precarious position not involving grooming per se(prior to social media thing), others are sweet talked by guys that portray themselves as SIkh , I think if mone started being serious about Sikhi this would really make a difference too...This whole liberal 'find your own' attitude to life partners is somewhat to blame as it has opened the door to sikhi-unaware BOYS and GIRLS starting conversations with non-sikh Punjabis who fail to hear the alarms bells because they don't know the right questions to ask or maybe are too busy living it up being MODERN (facepalm) that anyone who does the same is alright in their book.

It is not just girls who are being lead astray , the guys are also being targetted especially by Muslimahs ... The shame game can also affect them too ...

My kids only use PC in the family spaces and I also talk to them , but yes sangat they keep is important get to know your kids' friends , invite them around , if your kids are going out know where and with whom , they usually arrange to meet up at mine . If something has gone awry , it is not the end of life , talk and keep channels open and show them that you still care about their welfare, anger blinds and deafens everyone .

We grew up in an all-white area and Mum and Dad always emphasised what sikhi said about the alcohol, drugs, shaving, cutting hair etc but because we also could see the people around us getting destroyed by those habits we never once felt tempted . Don't overprotect your daughters equip them with realistic knowledge take them to talks from Sikh Awareness Society and your boys too , so they can understand what a Singh and Kaur is supposed to behave like and protect women of all faiths against.

[dallysingh101]

First thing, jkv and the other brother whose sister was targeted.

My heart goes out to you. It is really heartening to see how you're dealing with this head on. We've been sweeping this issue under the rug for too long and this had made things even worse.

I'd like to share some my own experiences (more like frustrations actually).

People talked about groomers using flattery to entrap their victims. I've seen a fair few cases of this.

But from my experience no talking to, or explaining patiently to a young girl ever seems to work (or it does but VERY rarely). I (and many people I know) have seen so many young Sikh girls actually getting off on the whole rebellious thing in this respect, that many people have given up on even trying to warn them.

Even Singhs going to the family house and telling the parents hasn't worked.

It appears as if the girl's mind is made up and nothing can change it.

I would like to think that today, given all the media outpouring, maybe apneean would be a bit more careful, but then I find that so many Sikh girls are really gullible and naive that they continually fall for the same old strategies. It's like the girls can't see through the attention - and the efforts of other Sikhs to try and warn them becomes a part of the fun.

I don't see this in other communities like I see it in ours, why?

[jkvlondon]

First thing, jkv and the other brother whose sister was targeted.

My heart goes out to you. It is really heartening to see how you're dealing with this head on. We've been sweeping this issue under the rug for too long and this had made things even worse.

I'd like to share some my own experiences (more like frustrations actually).

People talked about groomers using flattery to entrap their victims. I've seen a fair few cases of this.

But from my experience no talking to, or explaining patiently to a young girl ever seems to work (or it does but VERY rarely). I (and many people I know) have seen so many young Sikh girls actually getting off on the whole rebellious thing in this respect, that many people have given up on even trying to warn them.

Even Singhs going to the family house and telling the parents hasn't worked.

It appears as if the girl's mind is made up and nothing can change it.

I would like to think that today, given all the media outpouring, maybe apneean would be a bit more careful, but then I find that so many Sikh girls are really gullible and naive that they continually fall for the same old strategies. It's like the girls can't see through the attention - and the efforts of other Sikhs to try and warn them becomes a part of the fun.

I don't see this in other communities like I see it in ours, why?

like I mentioned that I was idealistic more than my peers because I thought Sikhi was open , all accepting etc etc that was because I didn't get to Guru Pita ji 's advice about not trusting Muslims and those who give oaths (Hindus like nehru and Gandhi come to mind) ...we 've heard the same girls saying 'I don't know why people are against interfaith anand karajs , I mean we allow other faiths in our gurdwarey don't we?' A lack of full knowledge of history and faith is so so dangerous ...

we have been feeding them poison via bollywood productions and singers for years , they think they are MOdern if they act like the gorian classic quote was 'we like to be individual innit not wear salwar kameez like our Mums' then you see them in identical jeans and Ts with the same haircuts (facepalm) those girls who were my peers are now having the same problems with their girls because saying NO is out of fashion

I watched this vid yesterday and came away thinking if they can make their own daughters accept the kool-aid then why do we feel our girls wouldn't since they versed neither in sikhi or the quran

[Jonny101]

Never let the blackmailer win. Blackmailers will never stop blackmailing. They have no sympathy for the victim especially if she is a non Muslim. Penji was very brave to tell her parents. Parents will get temporarily angry when they find out but eventually they will understand and work together to protect their daughter.

[dallysingh101]

Do people feel that progress has been made? Are our people (especially young girls) a bit more clued up about this now?

This isn't to try and put it all on the girls btw because there have been a fair few retarded apnay who've pretty much 'delivered' girls to their Pak friends. Especially in areas they dominate like East London.

I know people have been trying to highlight this within the panth since the 80s. I saw a lot, especially in uni during the 90s.

Is the message getting through? These days I see apneean in goray areas and it's weird how they like to throw the fact that they are creeping around in your face when you pass by. They look REALLY pleased with themselves, like they are winning! lol

And jkv bhen ji, I've seen girls from quite religious backgrounds do this too. So it isn't always down to lack of upbringing or familiarity with the faith?

Again I'm wondering, given decades of activity by groups like SP and now SAS as well as all the media coverage, are our people awake now or are they still walking around asleep?